Well I am in a similar position, except my cousin told me that she refuses to give me a shower because I have already had one!! That kind of struck a cord with me, but what can i do?!? I was married 4.5 years ago, did not last long, and gave more than half of my "new" stuff to him. I believe that any marriage you are having is a "new life"...so in my opinion I think you should have a shower!!
Very interested to hear in others' comments on this topic...