JOSIE

Wow.... I LOVE THEM!!!!!!!!! Very Cute!!!!!!!!

Well of course I'm going to say I understand, being that (you know) I'm dealing with a lot of the 2nd wife issues myself. I was hurt and offended when my FMIL said they would not contribute to our wedding, not because of the money, but because he's already been married- which they contributed for...but again, they have the money. It's hard to swallow because its really the one time that you want and feel the need for some attention and acknowledgement and positive experience considering you will be spending your life with their son. You are clearly self-aware and know that because of your FI's previous statements about his family, its making this situation more offensive. He probably just doesn't want you to get your hopes up that the family will ever be like yours is Is it worth going furthur and expressing your concerns to the FMIL? How well do you know her? Is it worth spelling out that you do not want any gifts and were only hoping for a small inexpensive gathering (IE casserole in a house). Is there any chance it IS about money or her thinking they need to do any sort of "production"? When I look at my situation (my FMIL is religous) I think she feels embarassed calling attention the 2nd marriage, because it inevitably means he had 1 marriage that failed, and I don't think she likes to broadcast that. Again, I'm just trying to put any POSSIBILITIES out there for you to analyze. At the end of the day, I had to completely tell myself that I am so lucky my own family is so loving and generous, and willing to do these things for me. I said while I am disappointed and hurt that his family is not partaking, there are many people out there where both sides give NO support, and that would be crushing. I said I wouldn't let it ruin our marriage or honeymoon dammit!! I just want to finish with the fact that email is SO annoying. You know damn well when you write an email how it sounds. It frustrates me that she gave you no explanation as to "why". It's also obnoxious that anyone has to feel like they need to "prove" themself. IMO, you are living and loving for you and Brandon, and not for his family. Nobody ever goes into a marriage HOPING it doesnt work out, and some try harder than others. (sorry that was a random tangent). At this point I'd be thankful that you are far away and won't have to be constantly reminded (by living close by) that you have to prove yourself. Good Luck- Keep me posted! I competely understand your feelings and my heart goes out to you!

hmmm. I like the "Please call to Informally RSVP by: ____" Can you put something like "Formal Invites will be sent to those who express interest" or anything like that? That may be too long. How much space do you have on the STD? How many people are you inviting? I sent 110 STD's that said Formal Invite to follow, and now I'm dreading having to send that many formal invites when I know a lot of these people arent interested. I'm glad you thought of this before you sent them out! I'm sure everyone understands that you need to have a head count for budgeting & wedding planning purposes. I'll probably send out a follow-up email to my guest list because I think a lot of them got the STD, thought about it, then got on with their lives and I want to make sure they can book while the prices are still reasonable. Good Luck...Let us know what you decide! PS: Super cute sig. pic!

Wow! What an amazing story!!! Congrats he did a beautiful job! How exciting that your wedding is in 10 days!!!!!!!!!! Have an awesome time

You're so beautiful!!!!! I'm SO excited for you!!!

That is so sad How many people are you planning on having? Were people booked and then had to cancel? There are a lot of questions I have before answering properly...but I'd say to give it 3-5 months to allow proper grieving time for the family. I think they will understand though, that your wedding was planned before your grandfather fell ill and will be happy for you either way. It will be a positive family experience to have everyone together. It also might depend on resort availibility and what type of ceremony/reception you were planning to have. Good Luck & Best Wishes in this hard time!

I know, the whole thing is totally confusing to figure out. I have no idea how much extra it would be per person, or if they will charge for extra chairs at the ceremony, etc. They do sound pretty lenient though, because half the girls just say what they want and get their way, whether it be the outside photographer, DJ, or whatever. My thought is to just try to do everything like you want your way and negotiate with them. If you have 60 guests staying at the resort it's insane to me they would charge you for extra dinners/setup etc, just my opinion though! PS: Your calculation sounds right to me

Girls- Brief update. I was feeling totally empowered by all of your posts so I emailed the FI to tell him that I'm working on this issue of mine to better our relationship & that I want him to be able to completely move past that point in his life without having to worry I can't get over it. It was a really long email but I had so much to say after reading everything you guys posted. Here was his response to me: Aw... babe. Thank you so much for that. You're so cute! I think you hit the nail on the head with the insecurity and her. I 100% agree with that statement. I appreciate how much effort you put in to "us" as a couple and bettering our relationship. I couldn't ask for a better fi! Love you! He's such a keeper & I am so thankful to all of you! Keep the posts coming - I love hearing your experiences too! I wonder if theres already a thread on here to bitch about the ex-wives!!! hehe

Jaime- It depends on your coverage, normally it wouldnt be covered unless it was specifically "scheduled" like how you add your ring, etc. Did you have a warranty on the TV Good Luck!!!

More Information: Here are some final answers! Dear Sherryl (thats my TA), Thank you for contacting Riu Weddings Sales Department. Regarding to your first question, it is correct the only way to have a dancing floor is having a private reception dinner and the cost is approx $1700 usd (this can change) including the Sound System or DJ, as you wish, because the Sound System belongs to the DJ, so he charges the same for playing him self or for renting the equipment, and it is necessary to have 50 guests, but it depends of how many people you will be celebrating we can maybe make an exception, the Brazilian restaurant is indoors and has air conditioner but it does not have ocean view nor garden, and the Disco can be rented from after your ceremony for the 3 hours long. If you wanted a restaurant close to the beach for the reception can be held only at Riu Palace Mexico. If you shall require further assistance, please do not hesitate to contact me. Warm Regards, Mariana Naranjo Weddings Sales Coordinator Mayan Riviera Weddings by RIU America's Division

Girls- I'm posting the contents of an email RE: this that was sent to me in feb. I hope you can decipher it OK! I. RECEPTION DINNER I have questions about the reception! Mainly being...can I do the "semi- private dinner" that is included with the package and pay a lesser amount for a DJ afterwards? Or is it DJ & Private dinner and the $1,700, bottom line? Also- as I highlighed below, do you have to have 50 (or over) to eat at the Brazilian Place? When it says on the attachment DJ with Sound System (for private dinners only for 3 hours)- what does that mean? The dinner AND DJ is only 3 hours, or the you have the dinner, and then the DJ is on for 3 hours? How much extra is it for more time with the DJ, and is this possible? From my experience you would have the dinner then get 3 hours DJ time. I am with you on the cost issue so I am sending a note for clarification. I will advise. Will also address your other concerns of the # of guests. By email you will pick up your restaurant of choice for dinner, the wedding spot and the cake flavor. If you have a large wedding party it will be more things to arrange via email. Groups over 27 people for dinner will be accommodated during the 2nd seating. The on site wedding coordinator is always glad to assist you, just keep in mind that she can not book providers or restaurants more than one month in advance of your wedding day, Everything is very well organized so you will not need a rehearsal dinner, though this may also be requested. The interviews are normally the day after your arrival. All the meetings are in the morning as the wedding planners are doing weddings in the afternoon. - Location of Reception. The wedding reception is held as a sit-down dinner at one of Riu´s Specialty Restaurants. An area is reserved for the entire wedding group to celebrate. Please notice that all restaurant reservations are subject to availability and capacity. We can not provide you other locations for dinners like beach or gardens. - Costs and Capacities. The cost of the wedding reception is included in the package and covers the food and beverage for the entire wedding group. It is important to keep in mind the number of guests each package can accommodate. Your final guest list will determine the package suited for your group size. On the other hand, there is no minimum number of guests required to have a wedding reception dinner. Wedding Package Guest Capacity Classic 10 Royal 50 Caprice Max. Capacity of the hotel you have chosen - Private Receptions The reception dinners offered in the Wedding Packages are semi-private at no extra charge. Private dinners are possible only at Riu Palace Riviera Maya & Riu Palace Mexico. There are only for one our and a half and during the second seating, with the following restrictions. Riu Palace Riviera Maya: Brazilian Restaurant: Minimum of 50 guests maximum of 60 all staying at this resort. Second seating 8.45 pm (can you not have a private dinner with less? or can you just not have a private dinner at this place? CHECKING ON THIS TOO…..I think I know theses answers from other dealings with RIU but I want it in writing from this resort Steak House: Minimum of 80 guests all staying at the resort. Second seating at 9:00pm Riu Palace Mexico: Brazilian Restaurant: Second seating 8.45pm Steak House: Second seating 8:30pm For both we need a Minimum of 50 guests maximum all staying at this resort. If you want to extend the time of private dinners, you can do it with an extra cost. NOTE: Riu Yucatan, Riu Playacar and Riu Tequila do not offer private services. - Dinner Menu. The main course of the wedding reception is table served by waiters. The restaurant’s regular menu is open for dinner selection. A self service salad bar and desserts bar is also set up Thanks,

I was planning to send my formal invites sometime in August. I have no idea if this is correct or not! Most of the people who I know for sure are coming (and I want to come) have already booked or are in the process. I did Save the Dates, so the balance of invites are for the people who probably won't come anyway.... I hope it works out!

Erin - Good Luck on friday!! I hope that Satan steps out of hell for a second to do the right thing for Brianna! No matter what- I say REFUSE Satan's presence at the wedding. I would DIE if my FI's ex wife came! Thanks for your great advice on my other thread I'll be checking back and praying everything works out for u!

Girls- I truly appreciate ALL of your kind words and advice. Believe me, it is REALLY helping me! I have so much to say to all of you!! Thank you all for your reassurance and helping me look at the situation from your outside perspectives. Now I know I'm not too crazy, and that my feelings are somewhat normal and I can conquer them. I know I just have to keep telling myself over and over that the past is the past. It's so nice to have people that can relate and share similar experiences. Everyone in my life that I talk to is like "you're amazing, you're crazy!". haha Rachel- To answer your question I have talked to him about it several times. He is very patient and loving but he always just says he doesn't understand why I'd ever compare myself to her, and that he cannot even do it, because it's like comparing apples to oranges. I feel guilty talking to him because I totally see and understand his point of view. I don't want him to think I don't accept him for who he is, and I don't want him to think I can't get over his divorce. I love him so much and can't stand that I'm focused on this minor portion of his life that happened 5 years ago. I did find an old wedding website of theirs and he was like "why do you torture yourself!?" I guess part of me just had to "know". Ah!! I'm trying to get over it and you girls are really helping me! THANK YOU SO MUCH GIRLS!!!!!!!!!

Gina, As far as I know you have to have 50 people for Chili's. I think it's even more than Bogo Foto! But I'm going off memory and hoping that someone else can answer 100%. I have at least 40 that have said they're coming, but I do wonder what people do if they only have a small group. I think Desiree is bringing an Ipod and bose system to play music

So, My fiancé was married right out of college to his college sweetheart. They were divorced a year later and she'd cheated and left with him with some hefty amounts of debt. During the time they were engaged/married she quit or was fired from over 6 jobs. She left him in a really tough situation because he'd moved for her and didnt know anyone. She even served him with divorce papers at work when she promised she wouldnt. My point is that the experience was horrible for him, and I know he does not have "positive memories" when he thinks about her.....but for some reason I'm still having trouble getting over "her". I used to tell myself it was because she was actually "married" to him and I wasnt at that point yet, but now I am and I'm still struggling with it. I'm big into self-analyzation and I know that my insecurity factors into it. She was just SO different than me, in every way. She was this tiny blonde who had awesome fashion sense and only wore designer clothes. My body is average at best, and I suck at shopping! Most of the time I wear t-shirts and jeans or sweats and I think my most expensive purse is from target. I know that doesnt make me better or worse than her, it just makes me self conscious because I assume that he had to see "something" in her, and based on everything else I know (and some talks with his mom) I've concluded that I think she was somewhat of a "status symbol" for him, meaning that she was that trophy kind of girl. I tell myself all the time that IT DOES NOT MATTER. Why should it? My FI is the first to say that he was immature in that relationship and I have changed his life. He tells me all the time that he never thought a relationship like ours existed and it was the best thing that ever happened to him. I've seen such big changes in him since when we first started dating and he does so much for me. For those who read my proposal story - - you understand what extent he went (and goes to still) for me!! I'm feeling totally guilty that I'm still insecure about this girl who does not matter to him. I don't like to talk to him about it (or admit it!) because he feels like he just wants to move past those horrible memories and when I bring them up or am insecure he feels like he's not doing his job of reassuring me that we are different and better. Then I feel awful because he does more than enough and i know its part of his past and I truly do accept it and KNOW he's better for it. I know it's my issue - I've known for a long time, and even though all of his friends, all of his family, and he himself have repeatedly told me they love me and are so happy he settled down with "a person like me"....i still have nightmares that she probably looked so amazing in her wedding dress and i cannot compare. part of me feels like a pyscho for writing this! but the other part wants to know if anyone has ever struggled with something like this - and how did you get over it? Thanks for listening girls - I needed to write it out.

thats adorable! i want matching rings too, but it was my idea..... i would be in heaven if he'd thought of it! sounds like a great guy

Ms.Betty- Thanks and Kelly is right....you and your fi are adorable!! It was SO HELPFUL to read your review and gave me so much piece of mind knowing and seeing how things go!! I was also undecided on the cocktail hour, but now think maybe it's a good idea! I love the gazebo location............looking at the pics made me SO EXCITED!!!! Also so great to see Chilis & Bogo, I wondered what to plan on. last but not least, CONGRATS ON PASSING THE BAR!!!!!!!!!!!! That is such a HUGE accomplishment!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THANKS AGAIN, FOR EVERYTHING! We're not doing a site visit, so this was so so so so helpful to me!

Good Luck!!! I can't wait to see a few teasers, and Tyler is going to LOVE IT!!!!

Kelly- That is so pretty and flowy- perfect for the beach! Plus you still get your green color tied in!! My girls definitely came around after they saw it. I think hearing the word "orange" people automatically get freaked out. I have a few girls who are kind of pale, and they thought it would wash them out, but in person it was much brigther and slenderizing! yay!

Hi Girls. There is an awesome thread on there for November 2009 Brides. Check it out, girls often post what all they've done or need to do! http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/t35417

Hi Girls! I can hardley contain my excitement. I bought my bridesmaid dresses this weekend. ( I decided to buy them as a gift to my girls who are coming to mexico) I orginally found a few I liked at JC Penny a few weeks ago, went I went back this weekend they were half off. These dresses cost me $25 dollars each and are exactly what I wanted!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm SO happy!!!!

Don't worry Desiree - I'm sure the CDC will change the alert in the next 2 months! I can't believe your wedding is SO close!!! I'm happy that the SIL & bro are not officially cancelled I had an awesome weekend wedding-wise! I went back to have a few other girls try on the orange dress I liked, and it was 1/2 off!!! All the girls loved them and they were exactly what I wanted, so I bought them. Literally they were $25 dollars each!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So here are my actual BM dresses!!!! (i am really fortunate all my girls are really small, cuz this dress was in the juniors section!) I'm guessing it was originally for homecoming or prom or a HS dance, and now that school is almost out and prom is over....they're all on sale!

Katie! It's gorgeous, congrats!!! can't wait to see pics of it on you! I love how sophisticated - yet beachy it is!!!!!!!

love this thread! my mom only had 14 people at her wedding, and on top of that i am the only daughter and granddaughter. My parents went to a DW and fell in love with the idea so they are paying for pretty much everything. MY FI's parents refuse to give money because it's his 2nd marriage and they already contributed 10K to the bitch that cheated then left him after a year (hes only 27 and we've been together 2 years...). I'm trying not to be bitter about it because they stated that they have the money but they already contributed to "1 wedding". I consider myself lucky that my parents are willing (and able) to bear the cost and we decided to help and pay for our honeymoon!!! I agree with Virg though, we just avoid the topic so its not awkward!!