Jump to content


Who paid for your dress

  • Please log in to reply
127 replies to this topic

#21 ~Nicole~

  • Sr. Member
  • 4,512 posts

    Posted 29 June 2010 - 12:02 PM

    I honestly don't think I would even mention it to her. If you're ok to cover the cost, then leave it. If she wants to pay for it then she will, or maybe she has something else in mind... a surprise maybe? I never expected anything from anyone, so if you live by that standard you'll be less disappointed and can keep a realistic grasp on your budget.
    *Formerly Nikki07*
    My Planning Thread

    #22 MDLady

    • Jr. Member
    • 433 posts

      Posted 29 June 2010 - 12:06 PM

      I paid for my dress and everything wedding-related but my parents did give me a good sized check and offered more but I didn't want to take more $$ from them. I have no idea what the tradition is regarding the wedding dress but any time you assume that someone will pay for you and they don't, you end up disappointed. And most of the time they do not know that they are supposed to or you expect them to. So I think you would have been better off not expecting it and if your Mom did buy it, it would have been a wonderful gift.

      #23 MysTea

      • Member
      • 559 posts

        Posted 29 June 2010 - 12:24 PM

        My Mom paid for mine and she gifted us money toward our planning but she also is very opinionated on what she wants me to do or wear so I had to deal alot with the back and forth of what dress I should get....Ultimately I left the dress shop with nothing and in tears because I couldnt deal with all the drama, I cashed the check (that was supposed to be for the dress), spent it on something else (unknown to her) bought a dress of which noone saw or knew about and just dealt with the why didnt you 's afterwards...Oh well...I say plan to do whatever you can yourself and if a gift is given to contribute than its a bonus. Its easier that way. Good Luck!
        **Dreams Palm Beach HERE WE COME!!! 11.01.2010**

        #24 vlynnw

        • Sr. Member
        • 6,003 posts

          Posted 29 June 2010 - 12:27 PM

          Definitely sit down and talk to your mom about it, but not necessarily the dress, maybe just ask if she can help out with any part of the wedding. When we went dress shopping I was planning on paying for my dress and then my mom would start talking about her and my dad paying for it. However, when it came to put the deposit down, I was the one that made the deposit. My mom made one $150 payment on my dress and I paid for the rest of it. Then again both of my parents have been laid off this year so they've been pretty tight and I was just excited they made that payment. I keep telling them I just want them to save for the trip and not buy stuff for the wedding.
          Veronica & Adam - May 6, 2011 - Dreams Tulum

          #25 Ashley*

          • Jr. Member
          • 206 posts

            Posted 29 June 2010 - 12:49 PM

            I paid for my dress, but after I told my mom I took the plunge and bought it, she seemed upset as well. Not sure if she wanted to pay, but she never offered either. So, I completely understand where u r coming from, but I'm sure your mom will find a way to help somewhere else...
            Dreams Los Cabos is where I'll be on four twenty-three, 2011.

            #26 Beth0413

            • Newbie
            • 38 posts

              Posted 29 June 2010 - 02:47 PM

              FI & I are paying for our wedding ourselves. I paid for my dress & veil myself.
              Can't wait to marry my best friend!

              #27 ShawanaK

              • Newbie
              • 20 posts

                Posted 29 June 2010 - 03:04 PM

                Me and my FI are paying for the wedding ourselves and I did buy my own dress. My mom doesnt have alot of money and I dont expect her to pay for anything. She is paying to come to our DW and that is all i ask of her. She deserve a holiday and i am very excited she can join us on our big day!!

                #28 skadow

                • Banned
                • 1,853 posts

                  Posted 29 June 2010 - 03:18 PM

                  My FI parents gave us about $5000, bless their souls. We are using most of it on our resort stay and planefair. The FI wanted to say no, but I know it would have broken his Dad's heart. He's their only son, and I dont think his sister is getting married any time soon.

                  My parents just seperated. My mom gave us $2500. My Dad bought my dress (He got lucky, my dress was only $300) I am buying all my acessories I.E. shoes, under garments ans so on...../pounders hitting Dad up for those.

                  We are using our First Home Buys credit to pay for the rest of the wedding and any money that we get from the wedding goes to pay for a new roof and the AHR.

                  #29 Princess402

                  • Member
                  • 737 posts

                    Posted 29 June 2010 - 07:38 PM

                    Lindslou, I think I totally get what you are saying and feel bad that you are having this experience. I know that it's not about the $$$.

                    I think that I have a fairly similar situation in that my dad passed away 5 years ago, and so getting married without him is just plain hard. I guess I had always hoped that my mom would get that, and would really step up to the plate to make this time special for me, especially since my dad is not here to share in it. Getting the dress was definitely something important that I looked forward to sharing with her. She has gone dress shopping with me, but I have basically had to force her into it. She's just not enthusiastic about it, and while she tries to be supportive, she has not had any sort of emotional reaction to seeing me in a wedding dress. For me, it was really disappointing. That being said, I think she is just not a wedding person. Anyways, she did really like the dress I ended up choosing and I too was kind of hoping that she would buy it for me, but nope. It's not because I wanted her to give me money, but just that it would be a really special gift from her to me. It really and truly is not about the money, and this might sound dumb, but I just want her to WANT to do something special for me. I want her to care that I'm getting married! I'm hoping that maybe she will surprise me and buy my veil or something, but I feel kind of doubtful.

                    Anyways, again, sorry you are going through this. My mom didn't buy my dress either. And I totally get that it's not about the cost of the dress being covered, it's about what your mom buying your dress would have meant to you. It's so hard planning a wedding without your dad, and even harder when your mom doesn't quite live up to your expectations. I really hope she surprises you by doing something else before your big day!

                    #30 jenninjamaica

                    • Member
                    • 547 posts

                      Posted 29 June 2010 - 09:08 PM

                      I bought my own dress. When we set the shopping date I held this secret hope my mom might offer to contribute to my dress. As we were shopping my mom mentioned how when she married my dad she was so proud she paid for her own dress because then she knew it was totally for her. I saw her point, and didn't mind paying for my own because I didn't have to please her (she would have had me in the poufiest ball gown DW or not!!!). I'm so glad my husband and I paid for our own wedding!

                      0 user(s) are reading this topic

                      0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users