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RSVP's .... non-responders

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#1 Sheree10

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    Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:13 PM

    Okay so we sent out our formal invites a few weeks ago and have a rsvp deadline of May 1. There's still some time to go but we've gotten very few responses- about 20%. There's some people that we haven't heard from AT ALL since we got engaged or sent out the STD's last year. We have a pretty large guestlist and I know everyone is not coming so why don't they let us know?

    Some people still say they would like to come and haven't booked a room or flight( They're gonna be in for a suprise... the tickets that were once ~400 have increased to ~700+, this doesn't include their room.)Some are still looking for a "better" deal. I've had people complain about how expensive it is, well geesh it is almost double now- we're only a few months away!!

    It's all so frustrating when I would like to plan for a welcome reception, oot bags, favors etc.

    When the deadline passes what do you suggest, do I reach out to non-responders( particularly those who expressed some type of interest) or do I assume that they're not coming if I haven;t heard from them? FI thinks I should just plan for those who I've heard from and don't waste my time finding out about the others. I already have enough on my plate anyway.

    Anyone have to deal with a similar situation? Any suggestions on dealing with non-responders.


    #2 tracy0716

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    • 431 posts

      Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:19 PM

      I feel your pain! When we ordered the invites the woman at the store made a comment about calling people who didn't RSVP after the date had passed to find out the response. My FI and I refuse to call anyone. We had some people not rsvp to our engagement party and the stress and frustration from that has made us decide not to extend the courtesy. I have no sympathy for people who do not rsvp. Unless someone specifically calls you and asks for more time I would count them as a NO. When a plane ticket, time off from work, and a hotel reservation are needed I don't think anyone will decide last minute especially with the high prices. Good luck!!

      P.S. My rsvp date is May 4th. We should compare notes and see how many people actually don't respond. Haha.

      #3 *Karla*

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        Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:20 PM

        All I can say is it happens. It is VERY frustrating and aggravating, but basically, people suck when it comes to RSVPs. I think I got about 50% of mine back. I would not go chase people down. Bottom line, if they want to come, they will book, if not, they won't.

        #4 CanadianLindsey

        • Jr. Member
        • 284 posts

          Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:30 PM

          Our deadline has come and gone and we haven't heard from more than a few people. Too bad for them, we already booked everyone! The worst one is a friend that sent us an invite to her wedding, which I RSVP to before it was due, and then she didn't RSVP to ours. She of all people should understand about needing a guest count for favors and caterers, etc. I have a feeling a lot of it has to do with the DW factor! Argh!!

          #5 missgomes

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          • 296 posts

            Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:34 PM

            Sorry.. but it sucks.. but the ladies are right. If they want to go, they will do what they have to. I'm sure we'll all be in the same boat.

            #6 mnh1983

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              Posted 12 April 2010 - 07:51 PM

              I wouldn't waste time chasing anyone down. I have decided that if they can't take the time to RSVP, I probably don't want them there anyway. Hope you hear back from more of your guests soon.

              #7 vdaybride

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                Posted 12 April 2010 - 09:36 PM

                Every bride on her has gone through the same thing, myself included. I hate that I called anyone to see if they were coming! If I could do it again, I would not have made any phone calls after people didn't bother to mail back the RSVP. I put the stamps on them, all they had to do was check the box and mail back! I say please don't waste your time calling or emailing anyone after your reply deadline. People will say they are coming and they are looking for a better deal, but if you haven't heard by the deadling, unfortunately they are probably not coming. Sorry girlie, I say plan for the people that you heard from and just a few extra. Good luck.
                Married 2-14-2010 Dreams, Los Cabos


                #8 DWbridetobe

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                  Posted 12 April 2010 - 09:50 PM

                  I'm so glad someone asked this. My RSVP deadline isn't for a while, but it gives me an idea on how to handle it once it comes!

                  #9 dolfinluck

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                  • 2,424 posts

                    Posted 13 April 2010 - 09:30 AM

                    I hear you, my deadline was 3/15 and only got about 50% back. I had FI take care of his side and my mom take care of my side and I reached out to a couple of friends. In the end most said no and we have 2 maybes

                    #10 Melidell

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                      Posted 13 April 2010 - 09:37 AM

                      Yep, I went through this one too. I think we all have. My FI was just irrate about it, actually, it was pretty funny. He was so ticked that we put stamps on the envelopes and everything and yet some folks still didn't mail them back- he was ranting about it like the worst bridezilla you've ever seen lol. I just wrote them off, or sicced my mother on them to find out if they were coming for sure. I think that's all you can do- the folks who are coming got their RSVPs back to us right away for the most part, I think.
                      Loving married life!

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