I am struggling also. To help keep costs down, I would like to keep the guest numbers for the wedding small, 20 or less, and then invite everyone to the AHR. I guess this could hurt some peoples feelings but what do you do when you want to keep it smaller and more intimate??
I have been thinking of sending STDs/invites to the smaller group with the wedding website information on it for travel as well as info for the AHR. We have no plans to invite people we work with to the wedding but only the reception.
Would it be fair to send out more STDs closer to the AHR and make it more of an invite for the AHR without having to send out another formal invite for the AHR?
I never thought it would be this difficult to decide how to do it.