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AHR... in 2 places...how do we do this?

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9 replies to this topic

#1 nmoreau

  • Newbie
  • 80 posts

    Posted 07 September 2009 - 09:46 PM

    My FI and I decided we were not going to do an AHR at all.

    We told our parents and they had a different opinion. They both wanted to do something.... To make it worse they lives in separate states so that means 2, yes 2 AHR to avoid the family having to travel to separate states.

    How am I going to do this?

    Do we include this information in our main wedding invites?
    or do I send out separate AHR invites to each of the groups?
    I do not think that either even will be very fancy, more of a casual get together... but still there are 2!

    So any advice from brides that have been in this situation? Or anyone that has some great planning advice on this?

    Thanks for all your help!

    #2 luciel2820

    • Jr. Member
    • 474 posts

      Posted 07 September 2009 - 09:56 PM

      I think you can add this info to your reg invitations stating the places where the AHR's will be held that way the guest can decide which one they would like to go to.. Some may even want to go to both. Pretty cool that you get to celebrate your wedding 3 times

      #3 karenk77

      • Jr. Member
      • 369 posts

        Posted 07 September 2009 - 10:36 PM

        yikes..be careful because if you include this in your regular invite alot of people might not be inclined to fly and just want to come to the ahr..which depends on how you feel about that may make you happy or sad if you dont have that many people there. I would send the regular invite to the people you def would like to have away, and then have your parents tell their friends they would like to have at the ahr and create little cards for that?

        i have a situation where my fmil wants to invite alot of friends that she knows from her building and the neighborhood but doesnt feel that close to invite them to the wedding since my fi doesnt know them..so we are having a seperate at home party, when we come back so we can show them pics of the actual wedding and just have a casual celebration his mom can feel like she didnt miss out either..maybe something in her house and we are only going to mention it to her friends.

        #4 *Meagan*

        • Sr. Member
        • 5,521 posts

          Posted 07 September 2009 - 10:52 PM

          Hmm I also think adding it to the invite will cause a stir and maybe even some confusion. I was born and raised in Connecticut and just moved to Utah to be with FI last september and all his fam and friends are from here as well..

          So we did an "almost married" themed reception last weekend back home in CT for all the people who cant come to our DW this January, and even for people who can.

          Then when we get back we are having an AHR here in Utah for everyone else.

          It will all work out! keep us posted!

          #5 nsbride2010

          • Sr. Member
          • 2,528 posts

            Posted 10 September 2009 - 02:06 PM

            We are in the position of 2 AHR's as well, since the distance does not allow either group to travel for the other (Quebec and Nova Scotia). So we are having two as well! We have to do two separate invitations though, simply because a lot of my FI's family does not speak English... otherwise, we would put the info for both on the invites. Makes things simple! :)
            Enjoying marital bliss since July 1st, 2010

            #6 clfaidl2

            • Jr. Member
            • 333 posts

              Posted 04 November 2009 - 07:45 AM

              We are having 2 AHR's as well. We are not inviting everyone to the actual wedding, because the hotel has a guest limit. We are making separate invitations for the AHR's. However, we may invite some of the guests that are already attending the wedding in jamaica to the AHR's. I guess we will probably put a little notice in the invite about the AHR in that case. Good luck!

              #7 CristiandJamie

              • Jr. Member
              • 445 posts

                Posted 14 November 2009 - 12:43 AM

                Nice to hear I'm not alone! Likewise we are going to have two AHR (one in OHIO and one in TX, and maybe one in Denver where we currently live)... so that would be THREE!

                I was thinking about taking one of the pictures from the wedding and put it on a photo announcement card then include a separate stationary card with the AHR information on it. What do you guys think about that?
                Cristi & Jamie
                http://img.weddingco...er/7nhul9k2.png32 guests including Bride and Groom... and counting

                #8 **~Linda~**

                • Sr. Member
                • 1,326 posts

                  Posted 14 November 2009 - 02:53 PM

                  Oh god. Not in this position but id probably be inclined to go with 2 separate invites just to kinda keep everything apart. I love the suggestion of a picture invite sounds really cute and i think you can make them cheap at places like Costco image centers etc. Wishing you the best of luck with your plans!

                  #9 futuremrsgoodrich

                  • Jr. Member
                  • 361 posts

                    Posted 15 November 2009 - 01:56 PM

                    We didnt want to have an AHR either (we are low key and love our destination wedding idea) but! the parentals wanted one, so here we go... We included a separate announcement card in the envelope for the AHR and are sending a separate invite to people whom were not invited to the DW but are to the reception... I think I agree with the theme of the thread responses, 2 AHRs could get confusing, I think I would do separate invites.

                    Best of luck with the planning!

                    #10 KJT1985

                    • Member
                    • 694 posts

                      Posted 24 November 2009 - 02:12 PM

                      We have to have two AHRs as well. My fiance is Canadian and 95% of my family lives in Colorado. My FILs offered to host our Canadian reception and decided on doing it before the wedding since it works out better for us regarding time off work. When I sent out STDs I just said that there would be receptions at home to celebrate with those who couldn't make it to Jamaica - didn't give details, dates or anything. His mom sent out the invites for the pre-wedding reception (which was this past Saturday!!!!!). Now I'm sending out formal wedding invites. We haven't figured out the Colorado reception yet but when we do i'll send out invites for that.

                      I know some people say its rude to invite people to the receptions who weren't invited to the wedding but I don't see a problem with this. I've been invited to a reception before where the they had a tiny intimate wedding with just family and I didn't mind not being invited to the real thing. Besides, the receptions are more for your parents so they should get to invite whoever they want (assuming they're paying). I just can't justify inviting 200 people (spending so much money on invites and postage) knowing full well they won't come to Jamaica just so they can "rightfully" be invited to the AHR.

                      I do know a lot of brides include an option for the AHR on their wedding RSVP so that might work too. Just have an option for both so they can indicate which one they'll be attending. This would certainly be cheaper as far as the cost of invites and postage. IF it's informal you could always send out e-invites for the AHRs.... You really have lots of options and it's totally up to you.

                      On a side note - ALL guests invited to the wedding were invited to the AHR.

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