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The text message @ 3am from your EX!!!!!!!!!!!

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#1 samanthag

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    Posted 18 October 2008 - 01:36 PM

    First of all, is it just me or are all the guys you have ever dated trying to get in contact with you now that your engaged
    I'm not talking about guys who hear that you are getting married, but guys who you dated in the past -who know nothing about your current situation- and now want to see you. Has this happened to any of you?

    I'll go first. About 8 years ago I thought I met the man of my dreams. I was only 24 years old then. He was everything I thought I wanted in a man. Tall,super handsome,sexual,very smart,funny, you get the picture. He has a great job and
    makes tons of money but was always working!
    I, on the other hand, a flight attendant enjoying life. Young and immature. Those were my drinking years! One night, while we were out & drinking, we apparently (I don't remember much) had an argument. Our first/only argument! I supposedly kissed another guy? Not my proudest moment, but I don't remember much?? I called a girlfriend of mine to pick me up because I was really drunk & couldn't drive. The next day I called him but no answer. The following day I called him again, no answer. That was it. It was over.
    I didn't see him or hear back from him. -I'm the kinda girl who DOES NOT call guys so the two attempts I made were HUGE for me.
    A year passed, and I saw him out. We ended up hanging out that night and he proceeding to tell me that he was leaving San Antonio to Miami for his career. I was heartbroken! This is the ONLY guy who has ever broken my heart!!!!!!!!
    Fast forward to 3am this morning & I receive several text messages from him. They all say that "I'm the one that got away. He thinks about me all the time. He's sorry for never giving me an explanation. It was all bad timing.He was focused on his career. -He lives in Charlotte now- He knows it's been several years but he still compares every girl he meets to me,we had a great thing...
    I received several more messages at about 10am saying that while he had been "drunk texting" he remembers everything he said. He also said that HE LOVES ME. WTF? While we were dating those were the words I waited soooo long to hear but never heard them!
    I can't confide in any of my friends because they would probably want to punch me!
    Please don't think bad of me for even putting so much thought into this but I can't help it.
    Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my FI!!!!!!!! He is the most caring, loving, unselfish man I have ever met!
    So why am I letting this guy get to me?
    Is it because he is the only man that ever "dumped" me?
    Please don't be upset with me for even posting this!
    I already feel guilty! -And I've done NOTHING. Not one response to his 6 texts!

    What so you girls think?

    Honestly, I can't even believe I'm posting this.....
    But I want to hear your thoughts!

    #2 RoryS

    • Jr. Member
    • 230 posts

      Posted 18 October 2008 - 02:36 PM

      I had a guy who called me after I had started dating my husband. This guy and I had a somewhat rocky relationship, but I thought he was very hot (at the time). I told him I was dating someone else and I had never been happier in my life. Never heard from him again. Just set this guy straight... tell him you are engaged to be married, and have never been happier in your life. Sometimes when the day to day issues come into play; we think that maybe things could've been different with someone else. But you know what - the day to day things will come into play no matter who you're with. If you're in love with your FI and he's a great guy - go with the love that you have - not with what you "had".

      #3 tvt

      • VIP Member
      • 4,812 posts

        Posted 18 October 2008 - 02:44 PM

        i know several other girls have had this happen too. me included. something about being engaged makes them THINK they want you. You know the saying "want what you can't have"?

        but you're engaged to your FI for a reason, and not to this EX for a reason as well. just remember that, if his text is stirring up emotions.

        #4 1elephant

        • VIP Member
        • 15,998 posts

          Posted 18 October 2008 - 02:48 PM

          Originally Posted by tvt
          i know several other girls have had this happen too. me included. something about being engaged makes them THINK they want you. You know the saying "want what you can't have"?

          but you're engaged to your FI for a reason, and not to this EX for a reason as well. just remember that, if his text is stirring up emotions.
          yes! i've had the 3am texts too. i LOVED saying "sorry, i'm engaged to a wonderful man who makes me very happy!" and have not talked since.

          #5 Hartyt509

          • Sr. Member
          • 2,262 posts

            Posted 18 October 2008 - 03:47 PM

            Happens to most people lol Just text him back saying i'm engaged getting married and happy so tough on you deal with it loser lol you'll tear yourself in knots otherwise x

            #6 JennyK

            • Sr. Member
            • 3,502 posts

              Posted 18 October 2008 - 03:59 PM

              Ive had that and the LONG LONG blog about me now being someone else's wife and we'll never be together again..blah blah.. last thing I ever told him was to go play in traffic..of course we'd never be together again lmao

              #7 JBinjour

              • Newbie
              • 107 posts

                Posted 18 October 2008 - 04:14 PM

                let him know that you are with a great man and move on. if you want to avoid any additional problems, you should change your number too.
                "Love is like swallowing hot chocolate before it has cooled off. It takes you by surprise at first, but keeps you warm for a long time.'' ~Unknown


                #8 rdhbride

                • Jr. Member
                • 313 posts

                  Posted 18 October 2008 - 04:25 PM

                  don't you just love how a man can mess with you or your head at a time that you just don't really need the drama!

                  #9 Mrs D To Be!

                  Mrs D To Be!
                  • Sr. Member
                  • 1,634 posts

                    Posted 18 October 2008 - 04:39 PM

                    if i were put in a situation like this by an ex, especially one who hurt me, i would take GREAT pleasure in telling him he is tooo late...this ship has sailed....and onto better things!! Get in there and make sure he is left feeling the way he made you feel!


                    #10 Jacilynda

                    • Sr. Member
                    • 2,777 posts

                      Posted 18 October 2008 - 05:14 PM

                      I'm with all the other girls on this, just let him know what's up straight forward. What baffles me, is that you still have the same number after 7 or 8 years!!! That's crazy!

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