72 replies to this topic

[cougs]

all i know is that tom and i are booked, we are staying 7 nights in a jr. jacuzzi suite at dreams cancun, and we're supposedly getting married while we're there.

everyone said they wanted to do it ... if immediate family wasn't on board we were going to nix the whole idea from the start. everyone was in. everyone wanted it at an all-inclusive. everyone said they were willing to spend around $1500 per person for a week for may of '09. we struggled to find the perfect place within everyone's budget, and most importantly, that allowed children. then dreams offered kids stay free and everyone with kids was excited! then we booked our date, signed our contract and sent a deposit ...

now one by one they are dropping like flies. not the people we were unsure about, but the so-called "definites" whom we based all our decisions upon. half of our bridal party is on the fence or out entirely! some are complaining about finances (airfare did go up substantially), but some of the other excuses are just classic: "the following week my kids have exams and i don't want them to miss the in-class review." SERIOUSLY. we're talking about 3rd grade here. not to mention these are the children we tried so hard to accommodate, choosing a place that might be a little more expensive for everyone else, just so that these people with children would be able to afford to come (since kids stay free). the dad is tom's uncle (and best man!) and one of the kids is tom's Godson (and our ringbearer)!

i'm ready to just get hitched at city hall, and just go enjoy our honeymoon at dreams. *maybe* we'll suck it up and take the free package for a symbolic ceremony for the 2 or 3 (out of 50-something) people who decide to show. or maybe we'll say eff the whole thing.

*SO AGGRAVATED!*

/the end. thanks for listening.

[Hartyt509]

Chick it happens to us all - I had originally over 30 people saying they would come 7 have booked!!

Let it go over your head its a year away and if prices drop, which I'm sure they will, people will book - and if not shite with them you are the only 2 that matter anyway xx

[jajajaja]

Oh gosh. I'm so sorry. I think you should still do what's in your heart (assuming this is still in your heart.) I don't have great advice- just wanted to say I'm feeling for you!

[Yari]

That stinks!

You will be surprised how commn this is...I say have the wedding of your dreams with just you and your FI!

[JaimeLynne]

I'm so sorry It is a long way away so maybe there's hope.. that's all I can think of to say. I would say maybe switching the weekend might help (when kids are out of school) but it sounds like those same ppl would just come up with more excuses... I'm sorry, that is so disappointing

[beachbride08]

I don't think there has been a bride on here that this has not happened to, me included. I think you should move ahead with your plans and have your DW regardless of who comes. I didn't look at your wedding date, but you never know who may book closer to the date. If you have a wedding at home you are still going to deal with the same bs from people. They don't like the hall, the food, the date. You can't please everyone and this is your day so the only people you should be pleasing are yourself and your FI.

[mhoudek]

I agree with everyone else! I think this happens to everyone-it is also currently happening to me! But you have a long time and people can easily still change their minds!!!! Try not to stress too much about it and all you really need is you and your fiance.

[**~Jenn~**]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mummergirl all i know is that tom and i are booked, we are staying 7 nights in a jr. jacuzzi suite at dreams cancun, and we're supposedly getting married while we're there. everyone said they wanted to do it ... if immediate family wasn't on board we were going to nix the whole idea from the start. everyone was in. everyone wanted it at an all-inclusive. everyone said they were willing to spend around $1500 per person for a week for may of '09. we struggled to find the perfect place within everyone's budget, and most importantly, that allowed children. then dreams offered kids stay free and everyone with kids was excited! then we booked our date, signed our contract and sent a deposit ... now one by one they are dropping like flies. not the people we were unsure about, but the so-called "definites" whom we based all our decisions upon. half of our bridal party is on the fence or out entirely! some are complaining about finances (airfare did go up substantially), but some of the other excuses are just classic: "the following week my kids have exams and i don't want them to miss the in-class review." SERIOUSLY. we're talking about 3rd grade here. not to mention these are the children we tried so hard to accommodate, choosing a place that might be a little more expensive for everyone else, just so that these people with children would be able to afford to come (since kids stay free). the dad is tom's uncle (and best man!) and one of the kids is tom's Godson (and our ringbearer)! i'm ready to just get hitched at city hall, and just go enjoy our honeymoon at dreams. *maybe* we'll suck it up and take the free package for a symbolic ceremony for the 2 or 3 (out of 50-something) people who decide to show. or maybe we'll say eff the whole thing. *SO AGGRAVATED!* /the end. thanks for listening.

Don't get aggravated Mummrgrl!! This is your day! And if everyone backs out and its just you and him, That's all that matters!!
I haven't got my booking info yet, however..I know when I do, I'm gonna have lots of complaints..Oh well :-)
Hang in there!!!

[cougs]

thanks to everyone for their support here ... i certainly didn't think i was alone with these problems (but it's probably even more common than i think it is) ... but first one of my sisters bailed (had my mom tell me ... never said anything herself yet), and at least one of tom's brothers is out. then my niece (matron of honor) and her hubby were all "SEVEN NIGHTS BABY!" ... now she's saying they don't know how they'll afford it at all (she's my most favorite person in the world). now tom's best man (who happens to be one of the only people who HAS booked) is giving us this crap about "can't we move our date because the boys have exams" ... i swear if no children end up coming and we could have gone ANYWHERE, i'm going to be pissed.

it's all bullsh*t. i know we'll be there, and our parents are definitely going, so that's us and our four witnesses. i was wrong about the deposit before (it hasn't been sent yet) so there's no contract in play yet ... not sure if we should just downgrade to the free package and just hire a good photographer. we obviously have lots to discuss.

thanks again, ladies. it's good to know i'm not alone, but sucks to know you guys are going through it too!

[jajajaja]

I really know how bad it sucks. Let me tell you that when we started having "definitely" turn into "maybe" or the dreaded "oops- i lied" we too became VERY upset. We even talked about giving in and doing a home wedding.

Instead we had a long talk and decided that we wanted to do a DW no matter what. We changed our perspective to one of "we will just think about those that come, not those that don't." It was the best move we made. We didn't worry about anyone else and consider them bonuses- not let downs. I hope that once you get past all the intial shock and pissed off feelings you will find the light at the end of the tunnel. I was there too girl- it's possible for it all to turn around. Just keep your head up in the meantime and don't let the assholes rain on your parade.