At Home Reception (AHR) Do's and Don'ts

[Brenners]

Ok, I am mainly focusing on the DW right now, however, I know I have to also plan an AHR as most people won't be able to attend or won't be invited (we are keeping the DW small) to the DW.  I have a few questions for those currently planning or those who have recently held an AHR:

 

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We are thinking about having it in the small town where I grew up and many people just put an announcement in the local paper for people to attend but then it is difficult to determine the amount of food you need.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day?

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? 

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how?

 

That is all I can think of for now.  If anyone else has any questions, then please feel free to add.  Any advice is helpful.

[Brandy]

As far as budget goes, I cant really answer that question, our families are pretty much covering everything.

 

I would say ours will be pretty formal, we will have sit down dinner and dancing.

 

Ours will be held exactly 2 weeks after our DW.

 

Buffet style

 

I will be wearing my wedding dress again and FH will be wearing his suit again.

 

Formal invitations will be sent out, 5-6 weeks before the AHR, with RSVP's due 2 weeks before.

 

A friend of the family will be doing our photography

 

Cake will be traditional

 

Decorations will be sort of similar to the DW, not sure exactly what they will be because FMIL will be taking care of most of that.

 

And we plan to have photos of the DW sitting out for people to view, havent figured out how yet, other than a few in frames on a table out front near the guestbook, and maybe some photo albums scattered on some of the tables or something like that.

 

[mochamakes3]

We are planning an AHR but don't have anything scheduled yet, but here are some of my answers.

 

1. Hoping around $5K. It had it's own budget.
2. I'm hoping for a brunch celebration. No dancing, but probably speeches.
3. We were hoping for this summer (4 months after DW)
4. Probably do a buffet since it is brunch.
5. Will most likely wear my reception dress and FI will wear his suit.
6. Formal invitations.
7. No photographer.
8. I plan on making a formal three tier cake to be served.
9. I'm hoping that we will find a venue with enough of it's decor that we can just use some from our DW.
10. We are most likely having a videographer for DW so we will play that.

[Brenners]

We will be paying for the AHR ourselves. My parents cannot afford to really contribute so that is why I am asking. I want to keep it simple but not make people feel that it is cheap.

[PurpleUnicorn]

i have started thinking about planning a DW just because so many of guests cannot come, i will definitely keep it informal though.  the one thing i am struggling with is invitations. i am happy to make them myself to save money, but i am wondering if i should even just do an e-vite - not sure yet.

 

i dont have a budget, but want to keep it as cheap as possible.  so we plan to do a BBQ summer party my sisters house. it will include dinner and hanging out for the evening. i will have music, but not sure how much dancing there will be.

 

i will definitely not wear my wedding dress - way too fancy! i bought a similar dress for my TTD, so if i dont really trash it, i might wear that. but even then i am thinking to get a cute white, cocktail length summer dress and wear that.  FI will likely wear shorts! he wants to wear shorts for our actual wedding, but that is where i drew the line!

 

definitely not hiring a pro photog - i have one for the DW and thats enough for me!

 

for cake, i am going to get my beach themed cheesecake that i dreamed i could bring to Jamaica! (but obviously cant and for my DW, i am just getting whatever cake is included in  my wedding package and sticking my cake topper on it). i think i will use the cake topper again - why not!

 

i havent really thought about decor. since it will be at my sisters house, i cant think of what we would do besides put tiki torches in her backyard and maybe get a banner or something,

 

i plan to do a running slide show of our pro photos - have to talk to FI about that since he is the technologically inclined one!

 

 

Originally Posted by Brenners 

Ok, I am mainly focusing on the DW right now, however, I know I have to also plan an AHR as most people won't be able to attend or won't be invited (we are keeping the DW small) to the DW.  I have a few questions for those currently planning or those who have recently held an AHR:

 

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We are thinking about having it in the small town where I grew up and many people just put an announcement in the local paper for people to attend but then it is difficult to determine the amount of food you need.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day?

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? 

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how?

 

That is all I can think of for now.  If anyone else has any questions, then please feel free to add.  Any advice is helpful.

[PurpleUnicorn]

oh and for when, we would do it in august - about 4 months after the DW, just because we wont be back in our hometown until then (I am away on internship this year).

[Starfish0512]

We have our own budget for the AHR - trying to keep it around 8k think it will be very do able... Our DW is immediate family only so the AHR will have around 100 guests.

 

Very Informal, we are doing a traditional style clambake, the place I am really interested in serves it buffet style.  there will be a dj but we wont be having any formal dances or speeches.

 

We are planning the AHR approx 1 month after our return from The DW

 

Food - clambake, buffet style

 

Attire - Will not be wearing my wedding dress, most likely wear my "rehersal dinner" dress from the dw, appropriate for the informal day, FI - shorts, linen shirt and flips.

 

Invitations - a casual pocketfold style, DIY, many of our friends are out of town so it allows a bit more flexibility for the amount of info I can include.

 

Photography - my sister will be shooting the day, luckily she is very talented in that arena

 

Cake - we are doing a cupcake tree with a small round for the topper, thinking about doing a grooms cake too...

 

Decorations - I love detail and am fairly crafty so I will be handiling the table displays myself, centerpieces, menus etc.  The location is on the water and will be outside, thinking navy blue overlays atop white table cloths using kelly green and crisp summery yellow as accents.

 

DW Photots - they'll be displayed on a table for those who couldn't attend....
 

Originally Posted by Brenners 

Ok, I am mainly focusing on the DW right now, however, I know I have to also plan an AHR as most people won't be able to attend or won't be invited (we are keeping the DW small) to the DW.  I have a few questions for those currently planning or those who have recently held an AHR:

 

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We are thinking about having it in the small town where I grew up and many people just put an announcement in the local paper for people to attend but then it is difficult to determine the amount of food you need.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day?

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? 

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how?

 

That is all I can think of for now.  If anyone else has any questions, then please feel free to add.  Any advice is helpful.

[Brenners]

Thanks ladies.  This is a great starting point for me.  Ours will likely be indoors so will need to do more decorating than if it were outdoors.  My FI just bought a smoker recently so am thinking that we can smoke some turkey, ham, etc...for some make-it-yourself sandwiches with fixings.  Make it informal buffet style for the food.  I have no desire to wear my wedding dress as I want it to be relatively informal so I like your idea of wearing your rehearsal dinner dress.  Thanks so much ladies!

[deannamarie85]

1. about $7,000 might be more

2.Semi-Formal, about 5hrs long with dancing

3. It will be two months after our return(enough time for our pro DW photos to be done)

4. we are having seperate buffet stations with passed hourderves(?)
5. I am wearing a fun, more informal tropical print wedding dress

6. We ordered semi-formal invitations

7.We hired a professional photographer

8.A fun, tropical themed cupcake tree

9. Tropical jamaican theme!

10. we will have  a slideshow that will be shown!

Originally Posted by Brenners 

Ok, I am mainly focusing on the DW right now, however, I know I have to also plan an AHR as most people won't be able to attend or won't be invited (we are keeping the DW small) to the DW.  I have a few questions for those currently planning or those who have recently held an AHR:

 

1.  Budget.  What amount are you looking to spend since you will have just spent quite a bit of money on your DW?  Did you include this in your overall wedding budget?

 

2.  Type.  What kind of AHR are you planning?  Is it formal or informal?  How long will it last?  Will you also have a dance after the reception?

 

3.  When.  How long after your DW are you planning the AHR?

 

4.  Food.  Are you having a buffet or a formal sit down dinner?

 

5.  Clothes.  What are you wearing to your AHR?  Your wedding day attire or something else entirely?

 

6.  Invitations.  Formal or informal invitations?  We are thinking about having it in the small town where I grew up and many people just put an announcement in the local paper for people to attend but then it is difficult to determine the amount of food you need.

 

7.  Photographer.  Are you hiring a professional photographer for the day?

 

8.  Cake.  Are you having a traditional wedding cake for the AHR?

 

9.  Decorations.  What kinds of decorations are you having for your AHR? 

 

10.  DW Photos.  Are you going to have these on display and if so, how?

 

That is all I can think of for now.  If anyone else has any questions, then please feel free to add.  Any advice is helpful.

 

[Samantha88k]

We just booked our venue for our AHR and hope to keep the total costs around $5500.

 

It will be a formal sit-down dinner reception because in our area sit down meals are less expensive than buffet and we will also have a dance because our DW will be very intimate so the majority of our relatives and friends will attend the AHR.

 

Our AHR will be 3 weeks after our DW, I would have preferred for it to be later but my fiance wanted it shortly after and I will be studying to take the bar exam within a couple weeks of our DW so rather than wait over 3 months to have an AHR, we decided to do it right away.

 

I will be wearing my wedding dress again, I figure if i get more than 1 use out of it I can justify spending a little more! 

 

I will be making our invitations and STDs, we are sending STDs for the AHR in order to hopefully avoid some people being upset that they are not invited to the DW.

 

We have hired a professional photographer who is just starting her business and was willing to give us a great deal because we didn't need the "typical" wedding coverage.

 

We have already purchased the decorations for the AHR, which will be similar to a typical wedding reception centerpieces.

 

I plan to show some of the pictures from our DW either on a slide show or framed around the room, I haven't quite figured out the logistics of that yet!