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No engagement ring syndrome


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#1 YIweddings

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    Posted 29 March 2010 - 04:03 PM

    I am blissfully planning my destination wedding for February 2011. Without a proposal or ring for that matter. Please tell me I'm not the only one.

    History:
    We've known we were going to get married for a while and talked about the summer of 2011. I'm not getting any younger here! We got really excited about a destination wedding that it moved everything up several months. We wanted to give family notice so they could start to save money and after the millionth time told everyone 'no he did not propose yet but..'

    He's actually asked me about a dozen times but more or less 'will you marry me when I ask?' He says we're engaged but I feel ripped off, why?... no ring and no fabulous engagement story.

    Yeah yeah we just bought a house, but am I selfish? yup! can't argue it. We've decided to have a nice wedding band for the ceremony. But I think I'd like to at least have a fabulous engagement story, are you with me ladies?

    I was so looking forward to taking out a full page ad in the paper to announce my engagement (we weren't sure if it would ever happen for me). I could see the headline 'Wedding Planner Finds her Happily Ever After. (note: as a wedding planner I was called JLo a lot and asked to not steal the groom). Now it reads more like "Impatient Wedding Planner Couldn't Wait for a Ring' "A story about an aging bride waiting at the alter for her groom".

    Love him dearly, always will, ring or no ring.
    Soon to be Mrs. Kramer

    #2 cathyandchin

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      Posted 29 March 2010 - 04:17 PM

      GIRL!
      Same thing over here... we knew we were going to get married "one day." We bought a house last year, we've been talking babies, etc.
      Our moms got together and started talking about funding a DW so he and I said OKAY! and we have sent the STD, paid our deposits, gotten our passports, etc... but NO RING!!
      he finally proposed this weekend but I totally feel you on the proposal story!
      Don't worry, a ring doesn't symbolize the commitment unless the sentiment is there.

      Be patient!
      http://tickers.Ticke....7ab3/event.png

      18 adults + 2 kids booked + bride and groom

      #3 YIweddings

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        Posted 29 March 2010 - 04:21 PM

        Quote:
        Originally Posted by cathyandchin
        GIRL!
        Same thing over here... we knew we were going to get married "one day." We bought a house last year, we've been talking babies, etc.
        Our moms got together and started talking about funding a DW so he and I said OKAY! and we have sent the STD, paid our deposits, gotten our passports, etc... but NO RING!!
        he finally proposed this weekend but I totally feel you on the proposal story!
        Don't worry, a ring doesn't symbolize the commitment unless the sentiment is there.

        Be patient!
        Thanks! and congratulations on your engagement.
        He shows me he loves me everyday, so I'm a lucky girl.
        Soon to be Mrs. Kramer

        #4 TATrisha

        TATrisha

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        Posted 29 March 2010 - 04:24 PM

        I joined this site in what, January? February of 2007? Had my wedding basically completely planned... and finally got engaged in August!! So you're not alone!

        ~Trisha~

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        #5 Cassie

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          Posted 29 March 2010 - 04:57 PM

          I also joined the forum before officially being engaged. Joined in February and just finally got my ring right before Christmas. I know there are several others as well, so yeah you're not alone!
          Married! -- July 11, 2010

          "I hope your marriage lasts 10 dog years" -- what my 4 yr old flower girl had my sister write in my guest book!

          My Planning Thread

          #6 YIweddings

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            Posted 29 March 2010 - 07:26 PM

            Thank you Thank you!
            Soon to be Mrs. Kramer

            #7 sunstarsmoon

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              Posted 30 March 2010 - 08:20 AM

              You are not alone. I still do not have my ring. We have bought it but he is waiting for his official divorce papers before I get it. It frustrates the heck out of me. He has been legally separated for 6 years! The official papers should arrive any day. But I am tired of waiting and waiting and waiting!
              July 8, 2011, Couples Sans Souci Ocho Rios, Jamaica

              #8 Girasole

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                Posted 30 March 2010 - 09:52 AM

                Committment is about you & your FI. If you feel the ring is important you may want to make sure he understands why...he may just be thinking you don't care since you have started planning. I know my FI is clueless when it comes to things & even thought we discussed marriage a lot, I had to tell him, I need a ring first, ha!
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                #9 MichelleS

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                  Posted 30 March 2010 - 10:02 AM

                  Hang in there.....it will come.

                  #10 YIweddings

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                    Posted 30 March 2010 - 10:26 AM

                    I think it's more silly than anything, the poor guy is hassled by everyone who knows and is grabbing my hand to see the ring. It would almost be a relief for him to at least put a twist tie on my finger. I just feel awkward when people ask how he proposed but nothing is official. THey all make fun that since I'm a wedding planner that I went behind his back and did all the work. I know I shouldn't worry about other people and that's what I'd tell people in the same situation but it can get tedious after awhile.

                    I'll carry a photo of our new house and call it my ring.
                    Soon to be Mrs. Kramer




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