What to do about guests who assume they are invited?
Posted 07 November 2009 - 01:40 AM
Posted 08 November 2009 - 10:35 AM
Posted 08 November 2009 - 06:24 PM
We have been working out the costings over the weekend, and after finally putting a dollar figure on the wedding per head - I have no hesitation NOT inviting them! I also discussed it with a coulpe of mutal friends who will be coming to the wedding, who will bring up "how much it is per head to have people come to the wedding, and how they can't believe that it will be more than a wedidng at home". That way if she asks where her invitation is, the budget explaination should suffice...
Posted 09 November 2009 - 11:40 PM
bags for all seasons..
promotional plastic bags
Posted 10 November 2009 - 10:30 PM
Posted 12 November 2009 - 02:34 PM
I had a friend from junior high message me on facebook and ask if she was invited to my wedding. I'd literally been engaged for a week! I responded saying that no dates have been set or guest listed started. She didn't respond.
A few weeks ago I had posted on facebook that I found my dress and I thanked my BM's who were with me. She sent another message asking if she was a BM!!!! WTF
I responded telling that I was honoured that she has offered, however I've chosen women in my life who have been instrumental in my life and who I'm extremely close with. I couldn't believe it!! I was baffeled!!!!
Now I'm torn... invite or not to invite. I feel like it would be a pity invite and I haven't even seen her in about 6 years. She wasn't even someone I was close with years ago!
Posted 12 November 2009 - 02:51 PM
I think your reply about how you chose your BM's was perfect and I don't think there is much further argument that this other girl could have and not really any reason for her to be offended by it either.
IMO, if you didn't think to have her on your guest list in the first place, even on the first pass before you started any sort of paring down, then you shouldn't worry too much and just keep being as polite as needs be if she continues with her questioning.
Posted 14 November 2009 - 12:40 PM
Needless to say...she did not get an STD. Honestly...I feel bad because I know she will feel bad once she comes to terms with her non-invite. I'm dreading facing her but...there is a saying "straight talk makes for straight understanding." I'm trying to live by this. I am finding that certain so-called friends are coming out of the woodwork. Many whom are just negative people. I do not want negativity on my wedding day.
As for the OP...IMHO...you should not invite anyone to an engagment party or shower whom you have no intentions of inviting to your wedding or AHR. Forget what ettiquette books say...think about how you would feel if the situation were reversed. I remember being shocked at being invited to a bridal shower but not the DW. I honestly saw it as a gift grab. That's why I have told all involved in my wedding...do not do that. I know many people whom I like and whom I would love to have at my shower...but just do not feel that it is right.
That being said...in the case of the OP...I would just tell her she is not invited. It is rude to assume an invite.
Posted 14 November 2009 - 03:43 PM
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