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How to handle invitations/save the dates

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#11 finleys7

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    Posted 28 October 2009 - 10:42 AM

    Originally Posted by shauna_grant
    Why is it proper etiquette to send invitations to family members who have already "opted out" of the trip and wedding altogether? IMO, if they already RSVP'd "no", then it would simply be a waste of paper and money (and pretty ribbon! :P) to send them an invite. :S
    I think it's just the nice thing to do. Also you never know, people may say no and then try and figure something out. And then of course you have the people who say yes in the beginning and when it comes time to book...something comes up and they don't go. Is that a waste of paper and money? Just looking at the other side.

    In my opinion, even if you have a Great Aunt in another state who you know isn't coming, it's just the polite thing to do. And who knows, you might get a gift out of it because they feel bad that they aren't coming...

    YEAH---We Did It! **May 1st, 2010**
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    #12 SuperKate

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      Posted 28 October 2009 - 11:16 AM

      Thanks for the input, everyone. I think we will send STDs to everyone and take it from there. Now it is just a matter of making a list!

      #13 affiwin

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      • 177 posts

        Posted 28 October 2009 - 11:19 AM

        We are sending out an e-Save-the-Date to everyone. We will then have two types of invitations...1 really exquisite set of invitations that will go to our guests that RSVP yes and/or who we know will come and another simpler invitation for those we know that no way in the 21st century are they coming or those that RSVP'd no. We have people coming from 3 Continents and have a good idea of who and who will not be there (barring a few).

        #14 shortnsweet7675

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        • 483 posts

          Posted 28 October 2009 - 04:55 PM

          Originally Posted by shauna_grant
          Why is it proper etiquette to send invitations to family members who have already "opted out" of the trip and wedding altogether? IMO, if they already RSVP'd "no", then it would simply be a waste of paper and money (and pretty ribbon! :P) to send them an invite. :S
          I don't know if it's proper etiquette or not, but I'm sending invitations to older aunts/uncles and grandparents that cannot make it due to mobility issues or illnesses. A couple have expressed to me that, even though they cannot come, they would like to keep the invitation as a "souvenir" and would like to be informed of our plans. I guess they just want to be "kept in the loop" for whatever reason. I'll spend the extra $$ for that. My grandmother, for example, keeps every graduation announcement, wedding invite, graduation program, etc. Don't know why, but she does.

          #15 frazali

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          • 245 posts

            Posted 13 December 2009 - 06:41 PM

            We sent out STD's and invitations to everyone on the invite list - there was no A or B list. I figured that there may be some who say that they're coming who won't be able to, and those who initially think that they can't and then are able to - so I didn't want to try and make the determination.

            #16 Tilly in the Sun

            Tilly in the Sun
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              Posted 13 December 2009 - 11:57 PM

              We sent out STD postcards/magnets from Vistaprint to everyone, even those we knew couldn't make it.
              We are now in the process of getting together invitations, and I think we will send out really nice invites with packing lists and hotel info to those who have RSVP's yes and we know are joining us...for the remaining group who have RSVP's no or said nothing at all I am thinking of doing a very simple invite, with a letter included regarding travel and hotel info in case they change their mind.
              Our AHR is four months after we get home from Cuba, so we're gonna need to do a whole new invite for that, which we will send to everyone.

              #17 debbmach

              • Sr. Member
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                Posted 14 December 2009 - 02:56 AM

                We're sending our STD and invites to everyone. There are a lot of family members that we know won't be able to come (for a variety of reasons) but we don't want them to feel excluded. You also never know who may say yes, and see this as a reason for a vacation themselves. I think the money spent on the invites, postage, etc is worth not making your family members worthy of being invited to your wedding, even if you know they won't be able to come. At least that's how I would feel in that situation.

                58 people booked...and counting!!!

                #18 buckain

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                • 37 posts

                  Posted 15 December 2009 - 03:03 AM

                  we struggled with this too, but decided in the end, so we didn't hurt any feelings, we sent everyone a STD and will send an invite to everyone. You never know who might come, I was surprised those i had put on the no list, are a yes!

                  #19 Barrierunner

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                  • 166 posts

                    Posted 15 December 2009 - 01:18 PM

                    We sent out STD magnets with a letter to family and close friends. That was around
                    30ish people. For other friends, work buddies etc, we will send out a STD email. We are not sending out invitations and are using a website that we built through ewedding.com to include all the wedding info needed.

                    #20 latina77

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                    • 24 posts

                      Posted 22 December 2009 - 02:34 AM

                      I'm a little concerned about something so I'm hoping someone will help me out!! I sent out a save the date but never asked for a potential RSVP reply..I'm starting to realize that for planning purposes I really do need to know the maybe's.

                      The wedding is for July 8 2010. Should I request a potential RSVP list I plan on sending out formal invitations by February - should I just wait until than how do you follow up afterwards - any suggestions on posts maybe with people that have inquired the same....

                      I like the idea of a wedding brochure and a website does anyone have examples of wedding brochures they gave guests and what they included in there? Also I would like to put up a website too - how can I go about doing that at a low cost? Any ideas of what I should start posting and what potential guests want to know? I created my own save the date cards and sent out FAQ's mostly about the booking info for now they are already mailed out. Our wedding is July 8th - BUT guaranteed group rate and reserved rooms come to a close though Jan 15th...so I know I definintely want to post that info and make some personal phone calls to remind people of the deadline!!

                      thank you! Renata

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