It wasn't my fault! Why am I the one getting punished???
Posted 09 September 2009 - 05:42 PM
I give my fiance all the info and he starts contacting the insurance company. He seems to think we won't get anywhere because i didn't get her policy number. THEN he starts riding MY ass for not calling the cops immediately. He's giving me crap, making me feel even worse - talking about how I ignored him and it's my fault. I called her back and she again refuses to give me info. Said that if I EMAILED her OUR insurance info, that she would send hers. She never ONCE mentioned anything about getting our information (other than wanting contact phone numbers).
SO my fiance sends me the number for the police department and tells me to call them and file a report. I call them and they won't talk to me unless i'm at the scene of the incident. I go back over there, call for a cop. Then when he comes and I tell him the story - he starts getting on ME about how he could charge me with fleeing the scene of an accident if she won't cooperate and come back to the scene. He claims that we made an "agreement" when we both left (who the hell decides WHAT we agreed just by leaving). The cop calls her. She gives him her info and claims there's no damage on her vehicle. So he tells me that he's writing the report indicating that we both left but is NOT charging us since she's willing to talk to him. He takes all my info as well and says that's he's going to go see her car (SHE apparently doesn't have to come back to the scene to talk to a cop). Then he gives me the "call us immediately no matter what" talk - says they don't mind and informs me that insurance will probably drop the claim because we both left and that it'll end up in court. And then the cop tells me that she works for a lawyer "a BIG, GOOD one" so it doesn't look good for us. He basically implies that it's something so small that we should just ignore it. Of course i'm in tears the whole time he's talking to me.
Again, fiance is all over my ass about "not listening" to him and calling the cops immediately. Then has the maturity to tell me that I have to pay to have it fixed with my "birthday money". My birthday was Sunday - HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO ME.
I'm so upset right now. I've lost all faith in humanity and the justice system. Ok, I should have called the cops right there. It's not that big and its really only paint - not a dent or crease. I THOUGHT I was being nice by not calling the cops on her right there - seeing as I THOUGHT she would cooperate. She didn't even offer me cash to just go away! AND THEN I've got my fiance making me feel even worse - acting like it's my fault and taking all his anger out on me when I DIDN'T DO IT! The person who's fault it was is going to get off - not have to pay to have it fixed. I've got a scratch/missing paint on my car now that i'll have to pay to fix when it wasn't even my fault AND a fiance who's being a DICK. Ok, thanks for letting me vent. Sorry about the language.
Posted 09 September 2009 - 06:48 PM
I didn't even know you were supposed to call police unless there was a minimum amount of damage of like $1,000 or someone was injured. I would figure the police would laugh at you if you call them for a door slam.
Is the damage really bad? What if you just don't fix it?
Tell your FI that he is not helping the situation by getting mad at you and that he is not working with you he's working against you. What is done is done. So blaming you obviously isn't helping!
Try and relax and think about the big picture. In the grand scheme of life this isn't really a big deal. Everything is going to be fine
Posted 09 September 2009 - 06:51 PM
I would have done the same thing and tried to be nice.
Do all the things you have to do with calling the insurance company - if you have her insurance maybe it can just go insurance without you having to pay?
cops sometimes just talk to hear themselves (no offense to any police officers out there) and just bc he's a cop doesn't mean he knows anything about car damage and her working for a lawyer doesn't mean anything if she dented your car...
Hopefully your FI will calm down and be more reasonable about this in a day or 2.
Posted 09 September 2009 - 06:55 PM
Posted 09 September 2009 - 06:59 PM
I’m so sorry that this happened to you! He’ll get over it- mine did. It could have been worse (I hate it when people say that!!) and thankfully it was only a scratch!!
Posted 09 September 2009 - 07:02 PM
While he shouldn't be making you feel worse than you already do, I'm sure your FI is just frustrated with the situation itself. People tend to take their frustration out on the wrong person...I know I can sometimes. So hopefully after writing all that out, you feel a little better. It'll all work out
Posted 09 September 2009 - 07:17 PM
On a side note - I talked to his mom. Apparently he called her on his way home from work. She agrees he was being totally ridiculous and was checking on me to see if I was ok. She told me that I had 30 minutes to fix a nice dinner or put a nightie on before he got home. Haha. I LOVE her! I think she calmed him down a bit - she always can! And yes- in the whole scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal! We DID just buy the car new a year ago but it's not the first ding so whatever...
Posted 09 September 2009 - 09:53 PM
Posted 09 September 2009 - 10:23 PM
I can't believe how big of an issue this has become. BIL is a cop and if this had happened in a parking lot here a cop would just come over make each of you sign a form w/ your insurance info and each one of you get a copy and you deal w/ it from there. Although since we're friends w/ most of the cops in town they would laugh at anyone who even thought of filing a report for someone hitting your car w/ their door..... I mean seriously have you never flung open your own door and hit another car. I have several times, and I didn't do it on purpose i accidentally just pushed to hard.
I also don't leave them my info saying hey sorry I hit your car when I opened my door..... who does that?
They make touch up paint for a reason. You can go into any automotive store they have small bottles of paint for every make and model to match exactly... like $5 a bottle.
Tell your FI to take a midol, take a bath and go to bed.
0 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users