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~Stephanie~

How long would I be in prison for running over Ex's FI with my Car? (long rant)

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Sorry this will be long. For anyone that was married before and has children, do you go through the same things? You know wanting to back over your Ex and/or his FI with your car several times? voodoo.gif

 

When I asked Ex for a divorce we were civil about it, used one attorney and promised to do whatever was in the best interest of the kids and not let "another person" come between that (apparently I was delusional). We even continued to take the kids places and go out to dinner with them. When I started seeing FI, FI had no problem with this. When Ex started dating his now FI he turned into the biggest a$$hole. (Well he was before to but this was different). Obviously the outings stop which was understandable but anytime we have to talk on the phone or in person and she was with him he is an ass and to the point and whenever he is by himself he is joking and talkative with me. (This is not a complaint but it is annoying).

 

Over the last two years I have been nothing but nice to this woman, I have been trying to "kill her with kindness," anytime I see her I am pleasant and try my hardest to make conversation with her. My parents were divorced and I saw first hand how my stepmom made things difficult for my mom. Underneath I loathe this woman. She is constantly trying to make it clear to me that she knows what is best for my children and acts like she would be a better mother than me. (She has no children of her own yet). It makes me want to scream at her to go get her own babies and leave mine alone! rant.gif

 

I have no problem sharing my children if she wasnâ€t such a hateful bitch to me. I donâ€t understand why she has to be that way. I know Iâ€m the “EX†but I havenâ€t done anything to be treated this way and there is no reason why we can be nice. I am by no means suggesting that we be friends. I not even allowed in their house when I drop of the kids or pick them up and she is there.

 

I have the kids call their Dad every night before bed because that is something we started when we split (as annoying and inconvenient as it is). But whenever he takes the kids he wonâ€t answer his phone and waits hours to call me back and never has the kids call. I donâ€t expect to talk to them on his weekends but I do when they are gone for a long period of time. Or for example, my youngest had surgery a few weeks ago and I let his dad take him for part of his recovery time with the understanding that I would need to be updated on his condition. He never called. When I called he wouldnâ€t answer and would wait hours before having my son call me back.

 

Last night was my breaking point. Nothing major but something completely unnecessary. I was talking to my Ex at soccer practice (he coaches, she came with) about an Easter egg hunt this Saturday (his weekend) and how badly the kids wanted to go. He is not sure if he will take them, they live 30 mins away. (he chose to move to another town away from his kids). I didnâ€t push it but offered to take the kids Saturday morning and then drive them to his house (we usually met halfway) if he would allow that so they could go. She was sitting in the car, not a part of the conversation and says in the snottiest bitchiest tone, “They donâ€t need to go to that one, there will be another one!†So I was tired of being nice and in the same snotty bitchy voice I said, “Well Ashton really wants to go to this one.†She proceed to make snotty remarks about how this is not enough notice, Ex and I both said that the note was just sent home from school that day. She shut up. (And from what I understand she isnâ€t even going to be home sheâ€s going out of town for something). Obviously this is not an earthshattering conversation but it was how unnecessary the bitchiness was over something so stupid that made me so pissed off. mad2.gif

 

At this point I feel like I need to get Ex alone and let him know that this needs to stop because Iâ€m not going to take it anymore and he needs to get her under control or I will put her in her place. I just donâ€t think I am strong enough to keep looking the other way and not stand up for myself even though the kids are involved. My FI doesnâ€t treat Ex this way despite his desire to hurt him every time I get upset so why should I have to deal with it. I just wish they would grow up.

 

Ok sorry, rant.gifrant done. Thank you to anyone that lasted till the end.

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I think you should totally say somehting to your ex (not confrontational ro anything) just causally something like "you know she's a btihc and it's un-necessary- and it's not a good example for the kids!"

i'm sure he alreayd knows this- but maybe it fhe's scared you'll snap some day and F her up he may say something to her! LOL

 

good luck! OH- and i think you will only get jail time if you get caught!

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Stephanie - wow, sorry to hear that this woman is such a nightmare to deal with. As a child of divorce, I understand that you just want your kids to be happy. I don't really have much advice to offer other than ignore the crazy biotch lol. I'm not sure what the rules about kids and divorces are where you live but when we turned 14 years old, we were not obligated to visit our dad anymore if we chose not to...so we didn't. Best decision I ever made lol. Luckily for my sisters and I our stepmom and stepdad are/were really nice people, so that was easy...just my dad was an ass haha.

 

I agree with kiki317, maybe you can have a heartfelt discussion with the ex about how her behavior is setting a poor example for your children. Good luck hun! *hugs*

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Im very impressed that you have been able to keep yourself in check this whole time!!... i would definitely let the EX know that you really do not appreciate her meddling in your children's lives and that it would be appreciated if she could keep her mouth shut when it comes to something they want to do... In reality these are yours and your EX's children and she is nothing to them except someone that their dad sleeps with... if you know what i mean.. and so i think if you make it clear to him that you are no longer going to take her vindictiveness... then hopefully he will get the hint and get her undercontrol!

 

... it may be tempting to run her over... but im not too sure you would see the light of day after that!

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Stephanie, this sucks! I would totally say something to your EX, but in a non-confrontational way like others have said. Just tell him that her attitude is not necessary and it makes a difficult situation that much harder. Maybe he will agree and already knows she is out of line, but just doesn't say anything to her to avoid a fight. She may be his FI, but they aren't her kids and in the end her opinion doesn't really matter.

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Aww Stephanie - that blows! ugh what a bitch. You are definitely the better person :) You should talk to your EX and just be honest with him...

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Steph ~ that totally blows. I would definitely say something to him. If you need to, get firm. I don't know what your legal custody arrangement is but definitely use the "she's not a good influence for the kids" and if he balks explain to him that you feel so strongly about her behavior you may have to do something legally about it. I know it may sound incredibly bitchy but you seem like a good mama-bear and sometimes people just need a kick in the ass!

 

Good luck!

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aww Steph - this is horrible! I can't imagine having to deal with that bitch - I'm so sorry! I would for sure tell your ex you needed to meet, just the 2 of you and talk it out with him - make sure she doesn't come though

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I second drtracy's advice-- it sounds like her behavior (limiting phone calls and interaction) may violate the terms of the custody agreement. I would check with an attorney to make sure all of the custody stuff is in order.

 

Honestly, I'm not sure that talking to the ex about her bad behavior will help anything. She's clearly jealous of the relationship that you have with the ex and the kids, so she's trying anything to muck that up. People like that don't tend to be swayed by opinions.

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You're damned if you do and damned if you don't I think chick. Next time she starts don't be nice just shoot her down in flames. Seems like the ex defended you you might get a shock maybe it pisses him off 2

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