14 replies to this topic

[JHarwood2Be]

Arggh...my last BF before FI requested to be my friend on Facebook. I accepted because it has been a long time and I have no feelings for him one way or the other. But it still feels weird. Especially because he is in another state and I have no ties to him through mutual friends.
The other 2 ex-bfs, one from high school and one from college, I still have some mutual friends.
I really don't think my FI would care and I'm not asking because it feels "wrong" to me. I'm just wondering if it is common?

[*Lo*]

hmmm I think if it makes you feel weird, then delete him! But there's really nothing wrong with it in my opinion.

My ex's have added me to FB, my FI doesn't care, and I only still talked to one...but we don't really keep in touch anymore at all. Actually since he found out I was engaged he hasn't contacted me! Strange. Oh well.

[Kat81]

I am friends with one of my ex's on myspace. All the rest were slightly stalking me so I blocked them. My very last one before DH was checking up on me every day. If someone new wrote on my wall he would email me or text me some nastly thing. The only reason I have one of my ex's is because we were together five years and broke up on good terms. He has a baby now and has been with his gf for like three years. Totally not stalking. So, if it creeps you out delete him. Or just put yourself in Fi's shoes. How would you feel if he added an ex? That is what I usually do.

[boscobel]

Personally, I don't think it's weird. I am "friends" with most of my exes. I put that in quotes, cuz it isn't like we still talk, but we are cool when we run into each other. And that happens alot since there is alot of overlap between my exes and my friends. So I don't think it's weird, as long as it doesn't feel weird.

However, I have to add that if my husband found out I had an ex as a friend on there he would flip. He's super jealous. It's an emotion that I don't really understand since I was never a jealous person, so I figure to leave well enough alone. Since he's the one that makes me happy, then I do what I can to make him happy.

So it's totally a judgement call on your part. Just make sure you think of your FI's feelings also.

[BachataBride]

I am only "friends" with people on facebook who I am actually friends with and contact on a somewhat regular basis. I do not need old bfs or people who I went to high school with sticking their nose in my business!!
I say if you have not talked to this person in the last 2 years and will more than likely never talk to them on facebook then do not add them. When facebook first came out all I did was add, add, add. I went through & deleted more than half of the people I was "friends" with. And most of them have since tried adding me again (multiple times!) and I just ignore them!

[Sloan]

My ex happens to be one of my best friends and FI is fine with it.

[1elephant]

i have one ex on myspace, but i don't use the account. we talk via AIM once in awhile. his wife HATES me so he only ims when she's not around, lol. usually he only talks about her anyway...
i've tried contacting another ex to say hi b/c we were in touch for awhile, but he never responded.
dh has no problem w/ me being in contact w/ any ex. i also don't add people just to have more friends, so i wouldn't search for any other dudes i've dated.

[dolfinluck]

i'm friends on myspace with one of my ex, but we mostly talk on aim every couple of weeks. we dont ever talk thru myspace but i know that he looks at my often because FI and I dog sat for a month the damn thing ate my earing and had to take him to the vet so we got the x-rays on a cd and i put the picture up on myspace. So anyways we were talking recently and i told the ex was going to phoenix for vacation and he was like "what are you going to do with your dog while your gone?" and i was like dont have a dog and i know that i never told him about the dog ....stalking much

[RedDiamond]

I'm friends with my ex before FI. We'd been together for many years and I broke up with him because he wouldn't help keep the house clean. I was working two jobs and going to school. The maid was coming in every two days and he still managed to make a disaster out of the house. He's really smart, and fun, but not good to live with. FI wasn't thrilled that he's on my myspace, but I think he's gotten over it.

[Bianca]

I am actually pretty good friends with some of my ex's and they are my friends on FB. Ironically, one that constantly tried to talk to me after I told him I was not interested, so I did go ahead and blocked after debating if i should or not. It was more annoying to repeat myself constantly than anything else. We were best friends for a long time. He committed suicide about 2 months later. I know it is not related at all... but now I wish I would have not blocked him and left that communication line open. I was the person he would always to talk to when he had problems, so i feel like I could have been there if he needed someone if I didn't block him.