I know where you're coming from. I decided to do a destination wedding because I love the idea of making a vacation out of it. Hawaii sounds wonderful, but I felt the same way about going all inclusive. We're going to go to Mexico in the Mayan. Beautiful resorts, beautiful scenery...
I've accepted that not everyone will be able to attend, but I also plan to hold a reception after we come back after a while for those that couldn't attend.
Good luck!