Gr8ful

And, if this doesn't beat all, we got 2 cancellations today via email. Do people just not get it? Oh well, I would rather know now.

Congrats Keira & Mel -- you both look gorgeous! I leave tomorrow. My FBIL is down there already and sent us a picture from Playa Del Carmen -- looks sunny & gorgeous, so everyone who is up this weekend should be all set. That Ida, she really wanted to shake things up, didn't she? Hugs to all, I can't believe it's happening!

Our wedding is in eight days! Thank you for this website, it looks better than what the Weather Channel has for us (rain on the big day, UGH). Wish me luck, and send all your good weather vibes, we'll need it! :-)

GORGEOUS! We have the same wedding date! Congrats & have an AMAZING time! Hooray!

Ladies, once again, you are spot on with everything. I did some soul-searching last night, and it would be SO wrong to do something for everyone else and not for her. She is a good friend and has been so amazingly supportive of me for such a long time (in addition to the wedding). I am a little disappointed in myself that I can't bring myself to be more giving without resentment (this is one of my personal issues that I am trying to deal with in general -- I think I need to call my therapist!), and the right thing to do is to give her the gift like everyone else, and pay for her transfer b/c I promised I would. And, I know that she would do the same thing for me. Gotta treat all your children the same. And, when I think about it, it does come down to budget, so I may have to scale back on the hair / makeup for everyone -- they might have to pay for that on their own if they even want it. I have been in situations where I have paid for it, and in situations where it was paid for by the bride, so I think either way it is acceptable. I'll think about this one a little longer. Thank you for giving me a place to vent and to hold these thoughts while I did my soul searching last night. I know now that what I was thinking was not the right thing to do, and I'm glad that your collective voice of reason set me straight! I'm so glad I took the time to think about it and I appreciate you for being so honest!

Oops -- I just said the same thing as Nadine. Please ignore!

I think it would be fun if you could get each person to tell you (and you only) something that NOBODY else knows about them. And make it into some sort of bingo game or guessing game around a table, and whoever gets bingo first, or gets the most correct answers wins a prize! That not only would be a game, but then people will know a little more about each person to break the ice. I did this for a work event once and it was really fun and well-received. But the little-known fact has to be interesting & fun. It can't be: "I once visited France." It has to unique and fun, like I can say "I love you" in 8 different languages, ask me how". In fact, have them submit three ideas, and you choose the one you like the best.

Here is inspiration from our friend Martha: Table Number Ideas Using one of these pix as inspiration -- I am using Mexican tiles for our numbers! There are a lot of options at this website. Some are pretty pricey. We have a small party, so hopefully this will work. Mexican Tile - Ceramic Tile House Numbers

J2K: You should send the mis-spelled cake to: Cake Wrecks to have it posted. Have any of you seen this site? It's hilarious and a great distraction...

Thank you TheOneDay -- I can't believe it is coming up so quickly! I am really excited. I did our budget yesterday, and it actually looks pretty good, so I'm proud of that. But we'll have to see how the actual event goes! That is so great you were engaged at the Tulum Ruins! How romantic! I love it there, and I'm so glad that we are getting married in such a magical place (on the beach, too bad we can't do it at the ruins themselves). Are you sure you want my wedding party? They have been great, but trust me, I have had my share of headache and tears...

Totally not necessary. The only reason why we are having one is b/c my FMIL offered to do it, and we jumped at the opportunity! Cocktails, or even a night to relax in your room would be perfectly fine.

I have a vent that ties into an etiquette question: - Background. I have a BM who has been out of a job for a while, so she obviously has money issues. However she has been great b/c she is coming down, and has been so supportive and wonderful about everything. - Vent. She needs money to get from the airport to her hotel. I was feeling generous so I offered to pay. Now I'm resentful b/c she has money to do other things like stay in a higher-end hotel and take a trip afterwards. - Etiquette Question. I was planning to pay for hair / makeup & I had gifts for the BM that equal about the same amount as the money for her cab. Do I (1) Just suck it all up and stop being so selfish and pay for everything, or (2) Ask her what she wants -- either the money for the cab, or the gift + hair / makeup. The costs balance out, and I think I would feel less angry about this. I think one of my driving issues is budget (big surprise!). I just don't have the money to pay for everything, and I feel bad about even offering to pay for the cab, but I felt kind of cornered. People call me up to complain about everything, and I feel like throwing money helps make the problem go away, but then I shoulder the cost, which doesn't seem quite fair. Then I get angry and resentful. I wish I was a more generous person, but it doesn't seem to be working out that way. What do you think?

PS. I think they had an agreement with the restaurant as to who they would use as their entertainment (again, it was just a guitar and a singer, who had a great voice). It was enjoyable to wedding guests and restaurant guests. Also, there was no dance floor for their first dance -- if you think about it, you don't really need that much space to squeeze in a first dance unless you have some serious choreography that you have been planning. It was really very sweet....

I just went to a reception this past weekend with no dancing! They only had the courtyard of the restaurant, and the rest of it was still open to the public, so they had to keep the music calm b/c of their other patrons. They had a live guitar and a singer, who was actually quite good. People were "dancing" in that they were moving to the music, but no serious "getting down" was to be had, if you know what I mean. They had a first dance together, but they didn't do the dancing with parents, etc. It was unusual, but to be honest, as a guest, it didn't matter to me b/c that's what they wanted, and it was tasteful and nicely done. Nobody really cares b/c they just want to see you together and happy. At least, that is how I felt. They had an after-party planned, where I think there must have been dancing and wild times (I think they like to party), but we didn't go to that part. That is always an option for your party crowd! Hope that this helps!

Thank you for this list -- I am printing it out as I am typing this out. Awesome!

I love the Phillippa Gregory books about Anne Boleyn & the Tudors (The Other Boleyn Girl, The Boleyn Inheritance, The Constant Princess, etc. etc). Great historical fiction -- very interesting, some history (so you learn something) and a dash of trashiness that I cannot resist!

Kristy: You are SO right! Part of it is about the attitude. Thanks for that re-adjustment!

I used to go regularly when I lived in SF, but not so much anymore in S. Cal, which is ironic b/c Bikram's first studio is here. However, I have been to a few of his classes and he's mean -- he yelled at me (this is how he teaches BTW -- breaks you down to build you up kind of thing), and I get it, but I do not like being yelled at even if I am wrong. It's amazing you are in this room with over a hundred people and he will single someone out and berate them. He's got good eyes, that's for sure, and once he's on you, he will be like that the entire class. So I don't go to that studio anymore (plus it's more expensive than the others). I'm e-scared of him! I do like it though -- I always feel cleansed after I do it with the sweating and drinking lots of water. I'm doing more "power" yoga these days (e.g. Bryan Kest) b/c I like being able to work out from home. Not the same, I know, but that's where I am right now! =)

Catamarans are kind of expensive, so I'm not sure if we will do it or not. FMIL is kind of crazy about it, so we'll see what happens. I am open to everything -- if all I have to do is show up, then I'm all for it! She & my mom are going to pay for it, so I don't want them to go broke on this event. We have been quoted $90 pp! So $50 pp sounds like a good deal! If this doesn't work out, we will do lunch and maybe hire a salsa dancer. This is what we were going to do until catamarans entered into FMIL's brain, and now that is all she can talk about! TheOneDay: The guy's trip is being organized by the Best Man (hooray!). I think they are going fishing and snorkeling, and I am fairly sure that frosty adult beverages will be served. I'm not even worrying about it. As long as they show up to the wedding (not even the welcome dinner!), I'll be happy. haha When my FMIL heard that the boys were having a party, she felt left out so she wanted to plan a "Ladies Lunch". She keeps adding on events, which is a bit maddening, but at least our guests will have something to do! Plus, I'm glad SOMEONE is excited about my wedding! I would have been fine just having my own private spa day, but I need to take advantage of seeing friends and family that have made the trek down. Plus, on a personal level I need to get out of my introverted shell. Also, since we are getting married in Tulum, the day of our Welcome Dinner, during the day, we are meeting people at the ruins, getting some guides and going in for a tour. That's an easy option for us b/c we are just down the road, and if people show up, great, if not, then we'll go by ourselves. I'm pretty sure that people will show up, however. So it goes: Thursday -- Gender-specific events Friday -- am Tulum ruins / pm Welcome Dinner Saturday -- pm Wedding / Reception Sunday -- sleep, sleep and more sleep hahaha Sorry so long, but I can't stop thinking about all of this...

What kind of echinacea, where did you get it? That is a good idea.

I love LC's hair. She is a great hair icon! I tried to do the braid thing that she does, but I looked like an idiot, so I'm glad that I tried it out. If you can get your friend to try out hairdos beforehand, that might help as well. I really recommend trying it out. I'm so glad I did b/c it was bad. The knot has quite a few hairstyles as well. Good luck -- I am sure you will look gorgeous!

What are your hints for staying healthy and not getting sick during the final weeks before your wedding? Being stressed is not helpful for the immune system, so if you have any helpful hints, please let me know. I am also traveling for work the week before we leave for Mexico (don't ask), so I am very worried about catching something. I plan to wash my hands obsessively, take a multivitamin every day, try to sleep as much as possible -- any other thoughts or secret remedies that you can share?

Yes, SgtPepperette -- get your hair and makeup done for your photo shoot -- make up will make a difference, and you should definitely get it done. Blow up as much as you want -- your day is coming up fast, and although I'm 3 weeks out, I feel overwhelmed as well, so go for it! Also, congratulations to you and all the early November brides! Our big month is right around the corner! OMG, I can't believe it, and I can't breathe when I think about it.

We are looking to do a catamaran trip as our "Ladies" event the day b/f the welcome dinner. Another option, which would require some energy would be a visit to Chichen-Itza. The only problem is that it is 3 hours away. But you are so close to one of the wonders of the world! Could be fun, but again, it is an all-day affair.

I don't think they need to match from a material standpoint, but they should have the same general feeling -- i.e. If you are going to have a big ballgown wedding dress, your BMs shouldn't be in casual sundresses (although who knows, maybe that would work). I love how your BM dresses look and although I can't see what your dress looks like, they both sound like they would go together.