To Be Pissed Or Not To Be Pissed.. That Is The Question

[GingerJ228]

Unless she plans on bringing all of her guests to your actual wedding you really don't have the right to be angry.  What is her other option fly to to destination wedding alone for a few days and come back or make an extended vacation out of it with her friends.  Who cares who else is st your resort as long as they do not interfere with your wedding.  

[Wedding2014]

I think she means inviting multiple guests to her wedding... In that case it's rude

[LoriGran]

As I mentioned in my first post, I completely understand that it is a public resort and anyone is entitled to go, but it did piss me off and I thought it was rude! It's someone I grew up with and consider a cousin, her significant other, her sisters along with other family members and her friend (the groomsmen's girlfriend) are going, I don't see what was the point of bringing more people along but whatever. It is what it is! If she decides to tell me she invited a group of people (because she hasn't told me, I found out about it) I will let her know that they will not be allowed to be a part of any wedding related events. I have been to 2 destination weddings, a friend's and a family member's and i would have NEVER thought of bringing my friends along regardless if I was there to vacation as well. 

[1BeachBride]

I found out last week that I have a friend who is bringing her friend along to the DR for our wedding. She never even rsvp'd so I assumed she wasn't coming, let alone bringing her female friend with her (who we don't even know). I was pissed too!

I didn't address it yet. In the meantime, I've calmed down and decided we aren't letting her friend attend any of our wedding events...We're not paying for someone we don't even know. And who wants be at a wedding where they're the only person who doesn't know the bride or groom...awkward! 

 

Relax and calm down, don't get upset before your big day!! Just don't let them attend wedding related events. They will be there on vacation but not at your wedding. But I still say it's very rude & upsetting! They could have run the idea past you out of consideration. I also have an inkling that they knew it was wrong which is why they didn't mention it to you and are probably going to try to crash... prepare your wedding planner about crashers and the situation ahead of time! I am!

[BusyBee280]

I have a girlfriend that wanted to bring friends with her on the trip. I didn't say anything about it (I was a little thrown off by it though).. I just reminded her that the events we are hosting are private..

[1BeachBride]

Someone brought up a good point on another post (similar situation of uninvited guests):

 

It is unacceptable to bring uninvited guests with you to a wedding at home so why do people think it's okay for a destination wedding?

[LoriGran]

@@1BeachBride That is very true!!!

 

@@BusyBee280 And that was my reaction very thrown off!

[kellymenning]

@@LoriGran

I think that's really rude of her! It puts you in a very awkward position. If you're like me, normally you wouldn't care, but since she didn't ask you BEFORE she invited them, that's really inconsiderate. Then it's just tricky because you don't want to be the mean bride who won't allow them to the wedding events because you don't want to have to pay for additional people you don't know, but then it looks bad. Just a bad situation to be put in. I'd definitely be upset with my friend if they did that. I hope it works out!

[BreMarie]

I think that with destination weddings you actually have to be a little more flexible with others staying at the resort who are invited by your guests.  If your single friend invited someone to bring along it makes financial sense, most resorts charge more for single occupancy.  Also, like many other PP's have said, this is also their vacation, your wedding should take up one day of the vacation and they're spending a lot of money to be there for it they should also get to treat it as a vacation.  One of the sayings for people throwing a DW is "You can have a vacation too!"   To help justify spending that much to attend your wedding.

 

I also think, unless you plan on spending all your time with single travelers to entertain them, you should support them bringing someone to spend time with...

[BusyBee280]

I think there will always be some people that don't see why its rude to do something like that.

 

We were actually called rude for "insisting that we make them go on a vacation filled with couples, and not let them bring anyone with them"-

 

We are at a point now- where they can bring whoever they want, but additional guests will need to find alternative activities while we are at our dinners/ceremony/reception. The majority of our activities are scheduled with family directly, and are included in the itinerary (no +1's allowed), and the rest is plans for my hubby and I. So I guess it's not too big of a deal (even though this particular friend that he wants to bring is kindof a shady character, so it makes it even more uncomfortable)

 

I guess we will see what happens lol