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Telling your bridal party to keep their drinking in 'check' - HOW??

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#1 Sunshine2680

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    Posted 25 May 2012 - 01:32 PM

    Hi all - I've glanced over the top forums in this section looking for something similar but couldnt see anything - so I'm sorry if i'm posting this over again.

    I'm looking for advice on how to tell my bridal party to keep their drinking in 'check' the day before and day of the wedding.
    I dont want to be a bridzilla b!tch - and I realize we're in Mexico and its all-inclusive etc. BUT i also dont think its right for anyone to be hungover on the wedding day - or plastered during it. For me once the formalities (ceremony, pictures) are done - they can go to town for all I care. But I dont' want them to hit it hard as soon as we start getting ready or as soon as me and my FI say 'i do'.
    I'm not saying they have to be stone cold sober (though thats of course my preference) - one or two drinks is fine...and to me its common sense to not overdo it out of respect for the wedding but some people just dont think that way - and I really dont want to assume they do either.

    So my FI and are looking for a 'nice' way to tell them all of this without coming off like we're bossing them around or killing their 'fun' either.
    Also - not sure WHEN to go about doing it either. Before we travel down there? the day before?

    The only idea i had was when we handed out their 'schedules' regarding the wedding day (indicating who's getting ready in what room @ whatever time) - we could add a little blurb at the bottom saying something like "We understand you're in Mexican paradise and its easy to get carried away but we'd appreciate if could restrict yourselves somewhat the day before and the day of the wedding out of respect for the bride and groom and their families"

    How does that sound?
    I really hope other brides have encountered this!
    ANY suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

    #2 AllieH

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    Posted 25 May 2012 - 02:10 PM

    I would just talk with them about it. I've already been joking with my friends that I would like them to be at most a happy buzz for the ceremony, but no drunks... 


    If you have friends who are the type to start drinking at 10am and keep on going, then a frank and honest discussion is in order. 


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    #3 Branya2012

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      Posted 25 May 2012 - 02:25 PM

      I agree with what AllieH said - talk to them about it and try to keep it light. It might take some courage to get up the nerves to say something, but just think of it in reverse, if you were a bridesmaid and your bride had something like that to say to you. I, personally, would want to hear it from her directly. I think the note in the schedule seems a bit bride-zilla-ish and controlling, in my honest opinion. 


      Have your fiancee by your side, I'm sure that will help! And there's no harm in talking to them about it before you go.


      Good luck!

      ~ December 5, 2012 ~

      ~ Las Caletas, Mexico ~

      #4 whatsup

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        Posted 27 May 2012 - 05:30 AM

        One thing to do is assign responsibilities of some kind, so they will need to be "sober" to fulfill that responsibility.

        #5 Sunshine2680

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          Posted 28 May 2012 - 05:33 AM

          Great pointers ladies! Ya - I think we'll just have a chat with them and maybe it won't come off so bride-zilla-ish!

          #6 june92012

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            Posted 02 June 2012 - 06:30 AM

            I wouldn't have really thought to address this- good tips!

            #7 Sunshine2680

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              Posted 04 June 2012 - 05:29 AM

              Originally Posted by june92012 

              I wouldn't have really thought to address this- good tips!

              well I didnt think about it too much at first...just assuming that everyone would 'know' they should keep it in check - but unfortunately not everyone thinks like we do and you do need to bring it up to them .

              here's hoping they respect us and our wedding enough to do what we ask!

              #8 Adesir8

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                Posted 04 June 2012 - 07:33 AM

                so glad you posted this, because it's something i've been thinking about too!!!


                great idea whatsup!

                Originally Posted by whatsup 

                One thing to do is assign responsibilities of some kind, so they will need to be "sober" to fulfill that responsibility.

                #9 DwBride2Be

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                  Posted 04 June 2012 - 12:08 PM

                  This is funny because I actually just brought this up with my family yesterday, and everyone seemed to think it was fine to drink.   They might have just been saying that to give me a hard time though!    Either way, I have a plan:


                  When the groom and Groomsmen are getting ready I'm going to ensure lunch gets sent to them so they eat, and hopefully it will be really carby - like sandwiches, or hamburgers or something so that should soak up any excess alcohol.  I just have to hope they will be smart about it!!  I'm more worried about some of the guests getting hammered that day, and not the actual bridal party.


                  Also I'm not too worried about the girls because I plan to be with them all day, and it's just my sister (who doesn't really drink), my friend Stacey (who does drink but wont excessively till the party) and myself.


                  Good luck!

                  #10 Mufin1785

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                    Posted 04 June 2012 - 12:10 PM

                    We are having a Welcome dinner the night before the wedding, and I am meeting my bridal party bright and early the next morning for breakfast and hair and make-up appts and portraits.  I think your girls standing in the will definitely understand it is the groomsmen you need to worry about.  Since I know groomsmen show-up drunk to weddings stateside. 

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