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Bridesmaids Dropping by the Day

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32 replies to this topic

#11 foxytv

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    Posted 10 August 2007 - 08:57 PM

    Oh, Shelley .... I am SO sorry to hear about this. It is heartbreaking, I know. How long have your friends known about the wedding? When I asked my girls, I told them I couldn't pay fr them to go and if they couldn't swing it that I woud totally understand, but to let me know then rather than later.

    Had the girls who have backed out put down their deposits yet or anything?

    All I can say is to realize that your wedng is more important to you than it is to anyone else ... and you do have to take it on the chin, as much as that totally sucks. Just know that your wedding is still going to be perfect because you will be there will those who ARE able to share in your day, and more importantly with the man you love.

    Hopefully, your girls who are backing out will make an extra effort to make your festivities before your wedding even more special.

    #12 foxytv

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      Posted 10 August 2007 - 09:02 PM

      Originally Posted by starchild
      Isn't that the rudest shit ever? Like you just told them in June or something, freakin losers. Not just yours, but mine and everyone's who bailed when they should have thought about their answer before saying "of course" from the start.

      It doesn't matter though, and you will have your dream wedding because you are marrying your dream man. My closest cousin told me she was going until the week before the wedding when she still hadn't booked then couldn't afford it . . . yeah stupid because what would have been $700 over 8 months is now $1200 due tomorrow . . . I still haven't talked to her. My mom says she's embarassed but you know what? We're all adults and people need to be honest. I would never agree to be in a DW if I knew I couldn't swing it.

      It hurts, I know, but it won't ruin your day AT ALL, trust me, you won't miss them when you see your man waiting for you!!
      Amen to that! It's true, you shouldn't agree to something so important to people if you aren't sure you can follow through (unexpected happenings not withstanding, of course).

      #13 michelle08

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        Posted 10 August 2007 - 09:09 PM

        shelly that sucks and at the last minute too! I know what you are going through and had my own issues with this. My situation might be a little bit different because I didn't really have a picture of my "dream wedding" but my friends are very important to me (I am closer to my friends than my family) and I wanted them all to be there but most of them can't because of kids, money, etc...I am only really expecting 2 out of like 8 close friends.

        Anyway, what keeps me going is that I figured at the wedding I would be preoccupied with so many things and happy with who is actually there and having so much fun that It won't matter at that moment that the other friends aren't there. Plus I am counting on my bachelorette slumber party I want and that is when I can really spend some quality time w/ my friends anyway, so if they can't make it to that..then they are in trouble! :)

        In the end, sure I will look back on my day and wish it would have been nice if they were all there, but really it won't change my ability to have fun or regret anything because as everyone else said, I am marrying the man I love and that is all that matter!!!

        #14 Chiquita

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          Posted 10 August 2007 - 10:02 PM

          That totally sucks Shelley.. I can't add too much more than what has already been mentioned in this thread.. but you will still have a beautiful wedding with Amos :)

          #15 Christine

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          Posted 10 August 2007 - 10:14 PM

          Shelley I am so sorry to hear that, I think that what's important at this point is that you and Amos have a beautiful wedding and share pictures with your friends.
          Christine + Will (married 7/20/07) + Ainsleigh (born 6/25/08) + Nolan (born 11/9/10) + Delaney (born 12/31/13) = One Very Happy Family!

          #16 cessyboston

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            Posted 10 August 2007 - 10:56 PM

            oh i just got home and saw this and it broke my heart ill be in your wedding........im so sorry but im going to say what you woukld say to me its about you 2... he is your family now....its so hard when the people we love dissapoint us but its about you2 and thats that.........we are all here for you....your weddingwill be your dream wedding.......it will be beautiful.....
            Married oct 10th 2008 ~ proud parents to Miss Sophia Emma feb 2, 2010

            #17 SusanK

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              Posted 11 August 2007 - 12:06 AM

              Shelley, you are going to have an amazing DW. Those that backed out on you are the ones that are really going to miss out. Hang in there, and remember it's really about the two of you :)
              Susan&Matt 10-12-07, Mia Lily 7-9-08, Charlie David 6-28-10

              #18 ~Melissa~


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              Posted 11 August 2007 - 12:19 AM

              I feel for ya hun. It's not fun being disapointed. But none of it will matter once you're there... well you may miss them being apart in the moment but it just wasn't meant to be.

              No matter what your DW will still be very special and you will be a happy bride. Promise

              #19 jajajaja

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                Posted 11 August 2007 - 01:36 AM

                How awful. I think every one of us can empathize with you on this because it seems to be a common theme. To me, it makes me wonder where common courtesy has gone. I mean, every day people bail. I make plans with friends all the time and it never fails that someone always cancels last minute, which I think is unnecessarily rude. Does people's word mean nothing any more?

                Not to mention, this is your WEDDING! How disappointing. I have a BM in the back of my mind that I'm just waiting to throw this ticking time bomb my way because she always bails on plans last minute with the "I can't afford it excuse."

                Personally, in your case Shelley, I don't think a money issue excuse is pretty lame this late in the game. You don't come up with money for a trip like that last minute if you have money issues. I'm sure you are aware of that...I digress.

                The whole point of your DW (or any wedding) is to marry the man of your dreams on your terms. Your (yours and his) terms so happened to be out of country. Enjoy yourself in the sand with the sun shining brightly above and the waves crashing next to you. It will be magical with or without BMs. Who needs them anyways? Right Ann?
                Happily married since 2008

                #20 StephanieMN

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                  Posted 11 August 2007 - 08:35 AM

                  Well no matter how you put it that just sucks! I think you have answered you own question by saying "dream" wedding. You are never supposed to give up on your dream. In the long run I guess it only matter that you two are there. I have known woman who can barely remember who stood to their left but know for sure who stood to there right, holding their hand.

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