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Your relationship with your MIL/FIL

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#11 Sloan

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    Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:19 PM

    My FIL's are wonderful people. They've been on board with the whole DW thing from the get go. They were excited that were werent doing an at home thing! However I would say that I get along better with FFIL. FMIL wants a "daughter" to hang out with and do super-girly things like going to plays and gossiping over coffee -- that is just not who I am. I dont think she gets my brand of sarcasm either, even though her son (my FI!) is exactly the same. But whatever, thankfully my FBIL's girlfriend and soon to be fiancee is a super suck-up and loves to hang out with FMIL. Not to mention we live in a small town ( I am not from small town, I am from big city - hehe and need to get the F out of small town) so everyone is all up in everyone else's business and it drives me nuts! FI and I can not wait until we move back to my home city. I love anonimity!

    #12 beachbride08

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      Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:29 PM

      My relationship with FILs is interesting. FI's parents are from Italy. The mom speaks more English than the dad, but both are limited. Plus, their accents are pretty thinck so even when they speak English I have a hard time understanding. Also, they never speak English if FI or any of their family or friends are around. I took an Italian class last semester so I can at least understand some of what is going on without FI having to translate for me all the time. They raised 3 boys, and don't necessarily care for their other two daughter-in-laws. I also try to stay out of the family drama and keep to myself so I have gotten in good with them.

      The rest of FI's family is another story. FI and his one brother had a falling out last year and they haven't spoken in over a year. I didn't care for his wife so not much lost there. Although, I get along with his other brother and sis-in-law i don't feel I can trust them. Again, I try to stay out of the family politics.

      #13 cougs


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        Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:34 PM

        my first thought was wait until harty gets a hold of this thread, LMAO!

        i really like my FILs for the most part. but since i am 9 years older than tom, one weird thing is that my FMIL is actually around my sister's age! i think that fact alone helps us get along well. i've already told her that i would feel weird calling her "mom" because of it. strangely tho, i have no problem calling his grandmother "mom-mom" like they all do, even tho she is the same age as my parents! maybe it's because i don't have any grandparents still living? anyway, i never had brothers, and tom has 3, so i'm all set now in the "little bro" department, LOL.

        don't get me wrong, they are a very big close-knit bunch compared to my small family, and are all sorts of in each other's business. some of them get gossipy, demanding, and even manipulative, and their home is a disaster. but i wouldn't trade them for the world. they have never made me feel like an outsider ... they are warm and welcoming and have made me feel like a member of their family since day one.

        #14 Hartyt509

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          Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:40 PM

          I hate mine - the bloody lot are crack pots lol FI has 2 sisters, one is a fruitcake and FI finally realised last year that she was and now he doesn't speak to her. His other sister is very ill but think the world revolves around her so I don't have anything to do with them lol FMIL is a different story I wouldn't get sick of punching the selfish bitch in the face all day long lol I haven't spoken to her in 10 months (which is fab!) and FI and I have an understanding he doesn't tell me all the horrible shit they do and I don't have ammo to fire lol

          Mine are a bit strange 2 lol my mum is dead and my dad lives on the otherside of the world so FI doesn't really have any contact with dad which is probably a good thing because dad is very sarky and FI doesn't get it lmao

          If I could have got away with her not coming to the wedding I would have because she just boils me on sight lol especially now she has a new hubby who is an ass lmao

          #15 Hartyt509

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            Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:41 PM

            Originally Posted by mummergirl
            my first thought was wait until harty gets a hold of this thread, LMAO!
            I was typing as you were lmfao

            #16 MonoAmor

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              Posted 10 October 2008 - 02:41 PM

              I think my FIL's are the sweetest people. I have only known them for about 2 years and dont live close enough to visit more than 2 times a year. They have always gone out of their way to make me feel welcome and like family. However, I still feel like we dont have a lot to talk about for most of the time. I would love to have a closer relationship with them, but it is hard being so far away. The rest of the family are awesome people and we get along really well. I would like to be able to open up more with FMIL and FFIL though. What have some of you girls done to try and bridge the gap a little more??

              #17 *Lo*

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                Posted 10 October 2008 - 03:43 PM

                I am in sort of a similar situation, I guess I see my FIL's at least 2 times a year, maybe 3 or 4 if they make visits out to Toronto. One thing I did, was keep in touch via email with my FMIL. She has told me she really appreciates keeping up to date on our lives as my FI is TERRIBLE at doing that. He calls her about once every 3 or 4 weeks! And rarely emails. He loves her to death but is just busy and isn't really the Share-y type with his mom.

                So her and I have developed this email relationship, she updates me on what is going on in Calgary, and I tell her about new wedding stuff, sent her photos of the dresses I was considering, she has 3 boys, so I think she is excited about having a daughter!

                #18 Angel

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                  Posted 11 October 2008 - 10:19 AM

                  I love my FIL's. His whole family is just as sweet as they could be, his mom, dad, sister, cousins aunts and uncles. Everyone is just so nice. From day one they've always treated me like part of the family.

                  #19 FoxyBride

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                    Posted 11 October 2008 - 12:58 PM

                    One thing that has help me is that my FMIL's in-laws were sooooo mean to her, so she doesn't want to put me through that. They really treated her like crap so she knows what it feels like. We get along well although I wasn't her favorite at first. (She's VERY religious and I'm... not.)

                    #20 BeautifulBridetoBe

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                      Posted 13 October 2008 - 10:01 AM

                      Hey ladies:

                      It is an age old joke that MILs are a nightmare. There are even websites dedicated to the subject.

                      So, what is your relationship with your future mother-in-law like?

                      Looking forward to hearing all about it !

                      Interested in sharing a Photographer: May 9 - 16, 2009
                      Punta Cana, Dominican RepublicPM me if interested....

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