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Bridesmaid Picking Advice

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#1 MagsieMexico

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    Posted 19 January 2007 - 02:24 PM

    I have a group of 5 best girlfriends in California from my 10 years living there.

    I have a group of 5 best girlfriends in London from living here growing up, and again now (moved back 5 months ago).

    I have a sister.

    My fiance has a sister.

    If I had all of those as bridesmaids, I'd have 12 bridesmaids, and that would be half of the people at my destination wedding!!!

    I really like the idea of bridesmaids... for many reasons, and a lot because i am really close to these girls... but I just don't know what to do.

    So maybe just have none??

    What do you ladies think?
    Margaret & Eric

    #2 anaderoux

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      Posted 19 January 2007 - 02:29 PM

      I think if you like bridesmaids you should have BMs, doesn't matter if they're many.. the pics will look gorgeous with you and the girls you love the most, dressed in the same color :)

      #3 Christine

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      Posted 19 January 2007 - 02:31 PM

      I would pick the three you are closest too then and make sure to have the other girls be VIP's and give them special jobs, like a reading, being in charge of something. For example, my sister is not in my wedding, but is a hair stylist and is doing my hair, one of my best friends went to pastry school and is making my cake.
      Christine + Will (married 7/20/07) + Ainsleigh (born 6/25/08) + Nolan (born 11/9/10) + Delaney (born 12/31/13) = One Very Happy Family!

      #4 Janet

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        Posted 19 January 2007 - 02:36 PM

        I think I might just do the sisters...then it's not like you are picking favorites among friends. The friends can still be super involved and part of everything...they can just wear whatever dress they want. Honestly, sometimes it's a relief NOT to be asked to be bridesmaid, ya know? Plus I think it makes sense to have a number proportional to your entire wedding. I think that 12 BMs at a 30 person wedding would be a bit much. Just my 2 cents though...when you are the bride you get to do whatever you want!! :)

        #5 LCBride2007


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          Posted 19 January 2007 - 03:29 PM

          i had a similar dilema. i could easily pick 1 girl - i have 1 sister. but if it went beyond that, i'd have trouble - how do i pick out of all the friends? and then there's paul's sisters. so we went with no bridal party. part of me regrets it because i don't get to pick out BM dresses and have a party with them. but the other part of me is relieved i don't have to pick out BM dresses and have a party with them!

          #6 TammyB

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            Posted 19 January 2007 - 03:33 PM

            I like Janet's idea, use just the sisters.

            #7 TammyWright


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            Posted 19 January 2007 - 03:33 PM

            i would just pick the sisters...too many BM's=PITA!

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            #8 JulieG

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              Posted 19 January 2007 - 03:53 PM

              If you are close to his sister, then put her in as well. If not, you can just have your sister. I think all of them would be too much. You have to sit down and think about who would be the best people to have. I have some friends who are good friends but are really flaky and I don't think will do the things they need to. I also have friends who are a little self centered and I don't think they would want/do, what is best for me. So, you have to think about that. Or, just use your sis or both if you are close to his sister.

              #9 MagsieMexico

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                Posted 19 January 2007 - 05:37 PM

                Thanks Ann, I had pretty much decided to do none, exactly for the reasons that all you wise ladies mention, but then I read your post earlier today saying you kind of regretted it!!

                i think I will tell all of my best friends that I want them involved but with such a small wedding, I am only going to have my sister, although I'm closer to them than to my sister in most cases! But I love my sis a tonne too, and it's a different kind of closeness....
                Margaret & Eric

                #10 Nrvsbride

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                  Posted 19 January 2007 - 05:46 PM

                  I have the same problem. If I put all the people I am closest to I will have 12 bridesmaids. It seems like so much especially at a DW. I think ultimately you should have as many bridesmaids as you want. If you pick and choose a couple from each group someone is inevitably going to feel hurt and left out. If you want all 12 then do all 12. If not I would do just your sister and your FSIL. Good luck.


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