Planning for 2013 and so many questions!!

Sarah Spain · April 5, 2012

Hey!! I wanted to introduce myself as I have been lurking for a few weeks now. My name is Sarah and I live in Charlotte and we are planning a DW for 2013. I had originally wanted to wed 4/20/13 but now I'm having alot of second thoughts. It was looking like it would just be the 2 of us but now I am thinking of inviting people and giving them the opportunity to go or not. I guess I'm already dreading the reactions and comments of people complaining of the costs and travel. BUT the more I think about it I believe that people spend their money on what they want to so if they have over a year to plan they could go if they wanted to. Which means I'm seriously thinking of changing my date to middle of June 2013 that way it would be summer break from school for those who have kids. We have twin toddlers and a teenage daughter but I am not planning on taking my own kids since it will be our honeymoon also. At first I was against kids period. But I know my BFF could not / would not go if she couldn't bring her kids...soooooo I'm swaying along the lines of allowing other peoples kids. Very confused on how things go. I have my 1st skype meeting with a TA tomorrow who specializes in DW and I'm hoping she has good info for me. We are prob narrowing down to Jamaica or Mexico due to affordability.

So do I ask someone to be a bridesmaid before I invite them?? Because I'm afraid that the people who I have always thought would b in my wedding, will not be going.

Also, are there any important questions that I want to know from TA??

So if I decide on a place and book...say it is for June 2013 and I book in May 2012...do I immediately send STD so ppl can be aware and save?

Very excited to have a place with people in the same situation as I am!

finleya · April 5, 2012

Welcome and Congrats!!!

I had a lot of the same questions and I know it can kind of be overwhelming at first. Don't stress about family and friends and how they will react. Some will be upset and others will be really excited. The best thing I can tell you is to just go with the flow and remember that it is about what you and your fiance want.

As far as a date, I chose April 2013 because it is the cheapest time to travel that isn't during hurricane season. That being said, I don't have many children going so the out of school thing isn't really a problem I have to worry about. I am sending out my STD's this week so you are fine time-wise where that is concerned. The biggest thing you want to do is to make sure that you get word out to people so that they can start to make arrangements as early as they choose to.

I chose Jamaica as I want it to be legal when we have our ceremony, and Jamaica has shorter residency requirements than Mexico does (2 BUSINESS days versus the 4 you would have to wait in Mexico). Just keep that in mind when you make your decision. We didn't want to worry about having to be down there a full week before we got married.

When it came to bridesmaids, I simply met with each one individually and explained to them that I would love for them to be a bridesmaid, but since it was a destination wedding and I know it would be expensive, I understood if they just couldn't swing it. That way they can decide for themselves and know that I would be fine with whatever their decision was.

The one thing I would suggest about a TA is to make sure they specialize in Destination Weddings. I cannot stress this enough. I went with the travel agency from this forum and Teresa has been fantastic about answering my questions. Just know that you will come up with many more throughout the process so don't worry about asking them everything in the first meeting. The first thing I would make sure you ask though is "what do I need to do right now?" They will assist you on what is a priority to decide and what can wait, and this information is EXTREMELY helpful.

Either way, congrats to you and good luck! I hope this helps a little!

Mufin1785 · April 5, 2012

As soon as we knew, what resort and what date we sent out save the date, letters to our close friends and family, people we wanted there and may have needed time to save up, that was 18 months in advance. We are not preparing to send out traditional save the dates to all of our friends and family which is still 10 months from our wedding date.

I used vista print for the both save the dates, we got free post card and discount invitation stock.

You can also set up a discount code, which gives your guest 5% off, for groups of 10 or flying to the same destination with American Airlines, up to 10 months in advance

Good Luck!

JayKay · April 7, 2012

As soon as we chose a resort and booked a wedding date with the resort we sent out our STDs. We made them pretty general rather then specific. We only put the month (January 2012) and the resort as we didnt have the flight schedule at that time and knew the date might change (which it did).

As to bridesmaids, I asked my three girls to be bridesmaids about the same time invites went out. Only one was able to make it (due to pregnancies for the others) but at least they knew they were a part of the wedding when they were invited.

Jessica4LUXE · April 9, 2012

Great questions and comments all the way around!! The only thing I'd add is the rates tend to be fairly low from March-June depending on where your destination!! As soon as you sign a contract with your Travel Agent, absolutely send out a save-the-date! It can't hurt to start looking at different designs now! You'll also want to utilize a wedding website so you can put the URL on your save the date and invites and have your guests refer back to it for important information instead of just emailing you each time they have a question

I would hold off asking anyone to be part of the wedding party until you have rates for the travel portion and they can decide if they can go And if they can't afford it, just make an extra effort in involving those special friends/family in things like choosing a wedding dress, shoes, making any Do-It-Yourself projects, etc Lots of ways to include people!