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At Home Reception (AHR) Do's and Don'ts

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My parents are throwing us an AHR about a month after our DW. The only cost is going to be whatever I need to pay for my lengha’s alterations (the outfit itself is a gift from my parents), otherwise we just need to show up and look pretty. ;) I know very little about what will be involved, but I know there will be at least 300 people (as opposed to our DW which is 30-40 people), it’ll be catered/buffet. No photographer, no cake, no formal invitations, just a big Indian party with good food and dancing and 90% of my parents’ friends. :P

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We are waiting 2 months to have our ahr. Mainly because of work schedules, when we return from our wedding. So we decided to combine my Birthday and ahr! We are having a church blessing followed by a buffet dinner and DJ in a local hotel. We are calling in a lot of favours from friends and family to keep the costs down! I'm going to make my own cake. I was thinking to make cupcakes and make candy trees instead fof serving a dessert.

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I want to do this but our budget is pretty high for our wedding, and can't stand a thought of adding something else to it..

 

Any tips for doing something like this on the cheaper end?

 

We were thinking maybe a BBQ over the summer- which my FI was supposed to be in charge of. I don't think its going to happen though, because not a single thing has been done for it lol.

 

I feel bad that not all of our friends and family will be able to attend- :unsure:

 

Maybe we could just host a dinner somewhere semi-formal in the area? We are getting married in November 2014- and we live in New England. So anything outdoors is kindof out of the question...

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I want to do this but our budget is pretty high for our wedding, and can't stand a thought of adding something else to it..

 

Any tips for doing something like this on the cheaper end?

 

We were thinking maybe a BBQ over the summer- which my FI was supposed to be in charge of. I don't think its going to happen though, because not a single thing has been done for it lol.

 

I feel bad that not all of our friends and family will be able to attend- :unsure:

 

Maybe we could just host a dinner somewhere semi-formal in the area? We are getting married in November 2014- and we live in New England. So anything outdoors is kindof out of the question...

I'm also getting married in November, but in Jamaica at a Sandals.

 

Anyways, a ton of our family/friends won't be able to go, so my future mother-in-law suggested we do like a "Jack and Jill" party before we leave. Something that won't hurt the bank account... BBQ-ish. We haven't done anything about it yet either lol so don't think you're alone.

 

I think it'd be worth putting together though.. I'm not having a bridal shower. We already have been living together in a house for over 3 years so it's kind of silly to have a party just to ask for things I don't need. I could, of course, when doing the Jack and Jill, make a Sandals registry or just politely ask for gift cards to Target, etc. since we're already established.

 

I also live in the Northeast, upstate NY, so right before or after the wedding isn't feasible for an outside type thing. My future mother in law has a decent backyard and we know people who can provide tents/tables/chairs. We could just do some chicken, burgers, hot dogs, and some side salad stuff. Or maybe using a restaurant's catering would be cheaper - we'd have to price it out. It probably would be cheaper doing something at home than at a restaurant..? Not sure. Septemberish would still be nice outside I would think..

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I want to do this but our budget is pretty high for our wedding, and can't stand a thought of adding something else to it..

 

Any tips for doing something like this on the cheaper end?

 

We were thinking maybe a BBQ over the summer- which my FI was supposed to be in charge of. I don't think its going to happen though, because not a single thing has been done for it lol.

 

I feel bad that not all of our friends and family will be able to attend- :unsure:

 

Maybe we could just host a dinner somewhere semi-formal in the area? We are getting married in November 2014- and we live in New England. So anything outdoors is kindof out of the question...

 

 

Hello - I am getting married in October and also live in NE - We only invited a few people to our DW so we want to do something for other people that we didn't invite but would love to share our wedding with.  I am unsure of when we are going to do an AHR though.  We come back from our HM in the beginning of November so I don't know if we will be up to planning something for the following weekend and then it gets into all the holidays.   Also, like you mentioned the weather is always an issue that time of year.  So for that reason I think I am going to plan for spring - anything further will seem just too far I think.

 

As for ways to not spend too much - there is the obvious DIYing things like decor.  Also, check places like craigslist for listing from people trying to get into specific fields ie: photography, baking/cake decorating, floral design, event planning, and so on.  Be sure to meet them (more then once) and get some samples of work and any references they might have. If you can find someone that seems like a good fit it is a great way to save you money and give them work for their portfolios.

 

Hope that helps :) 

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Thanks guys! The more people who drop out of coming to the wedding, the more I'm opted to do something like this for everyone who can't attend.

 

We were thinking of making a video of the whole weekend and sharing it at the party somehow.

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A cheaper alternative to the reception is having a "cocktail reception" that starts at 7pm (or around there), and is AFTER dinner. That way you can serve some appies, meat/cheese platters, dessert platters, etc, without having a fully catered meal. This way you skip the tableware too. We'll also have a tooney bar which will help pay for the alcohol.

 

This is how mine is roughly breaking down:

Hall Rental $400

DJ Rental $495

Appie Platters $600

Alcohol $100-200 after the tooneys

 

Obviously there will be lots of other little costs like the centre pieces, if we choose to do a cake, (Probably not) and if we choose to include our DW photos at all. The main thing about the reception I want, is a good dance party, so the whole thing can be pretty bare bones, as long as I have a hall, liquor and a DJ. :)

 

Will send out a pretty informal invitation 6 months prior to the event, and I will be wearing my dress again.

Edited by nikkicraig10
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We are having a very simple reception at home, its going to cost us about 1900 € ( 2500) with alcohol, food , DJ, and linen rental

Edited by stefadile

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A cheaper alternative to the reception is having a "cocktail reception" that starts at 7pm (or around there), and is AFTER dinner. That way you can serve some appies, meat/cheese platters, dessert platters, etc, without having a fully catered meal. This way you skip the tableware too. We'll also have a tooney bar which will help pay for the alcohol.

 

This is how mine is roughly breaking down:

Hall Rental $400

DJ Rental $495

Appie Platters $600

Alcohol $100-200 after the tooneys

 

Obviously there will be lots of other little costs like the centre pieces, if we choose to do a cake, (Probably not) and if we choose to include our DW photos at all. The main thing about the reception I want, is a good dance party, so the whole thing can be pretty bare bones, as long as I have a hall, liquor and a DJ. :)

 

Will send out a pretty informal invitation 6 months prior to the event, and I will be wearing my dress again.

I love this idea!! I just worry that serving drinks may end up costing more than serving dinner.

 

The majority of our families do not drink very much, but we do have a few members who like to guzzle down boose, so we worry about the cost of having liquor.

 

What is a "tooneys"?

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I love this idea!! I just worry that serving drinks may end up costing more than serving dinner.

 

The majority of our families do not drink very much, but we do have a few members who like to guzzle down boose, so we worry about the cost of having liquor.

 

What is a "tooneys"?

I've got a similar problem, my family wouldn't be big drinkers, but some of the guests are. We've decided to just buy a set amount of alcohol, and once its gone, people are on their own.... I know it seems cheap, but we just can't afford to do an open bar.

Edited by stefadile

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