Having a hard time know my friends cant come

[*HOLLY*]

So planning this DW can be soooo stressful. All of the BM dresses are picked out except for 2 which will be done tonight. I know half of my BM will not be able to go on the cruise to see my FI and I get married and it saddens me. He really wants his beach/cruise wedding and so do I but I want not only my family there but friends. If we booked a resort it would be much differant but we are on a 10day cruise Anyone have insite on this?

[Outdoor_girl1010]

I only ask this because I dont know, how would it be much differant being at a resort? If its the number of days. What if your BM made the trip to what island you are getting married at and make it a long weekend or something. I know they wont be with you on your whole trip, but then at least they could be at the wedding. I dont know just a thought!

[*HOLLY*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Outdoor_girl1010 I only ask this because I dont know, how would it be much differant being at a resort? If its the number of days. What if your BM made the trip to what island you are getting married at and make it a long weekend or something. I know they wont be with you on your whole trip, but then at least they could be at the wedding. I dont know just a thought!

Ive told them they can just fly down to St. Thomas and be there for the wedding and just have a mini vacation of there own. The problem is one is saving up for a car another for a home and so on.
Would you be upset if you could only where the dress at the AHR and not be in the actual wedding itself?
I mean I could do a small wedding here but what is the point of a wedding on the beach if I do something here kwim?

[Outdoor_girl1010]

I would not be upset. Just think when you are in a wedding state side most the time you only where the dress once. My MOH is not going now because she is due in Dec, but she went ahead and got her dress for the AHR.

[karenk77]

That sucks..im sorry

But in the end all that matters is what you have always dreamed of is actually going to happen and the rest dont worry about...would it be better having it here so that its more comfortable for everyone else but not what you have always wanted? no that isnt right either. Dont do a small wedding here...your doing it once so do it the way youve always dreamed of. you may not even be friends with the same people years from now ,hopefully that will never happen but you never ever know

[Lara]

Scubadiva, I am having a similar problem. My MOH is getting married a few months before I am, and she is unable to confirm if she will be able to come until after her wedding. The problem is, who knows if there will still be space on the plane/at the resort by the time she can confirm...we're coming on a charter flight from Vancouver to Jamaica that only flies once a week, so there's a chance that she might not be able to get on the plane =( And that's only if she is able to afford it - if they go too much into debt after their wedding, they've warned us that they might not come.

 

At the end of the day, I'm just looking forward to marrying the love of my life in a beautiful setting. Whether I'm surrounded by ALL of my family and friends or just a few of them, I'll be happy=) As for my MOH, if she isn't able to come on the trip, she will simply be a big part of the AHR and she is fine with that.

[islandbride317]

Oh, Holly.....soory sorry to hear of your bridesmaid troubles, love!

 

Everytime I hear about someone's BM drama, it makes me feel like I made the right decision not to have any myself -- there are just too many variables to deal with when trying to have a bridal party attend a DW, and the stress it causes (as you WELL-KNOW, I am sure!) is intense.

 

I think if your friends can't attend, then maybe they shouldn't have to buy the dress (and if it means that much to you that they wear it for your AHR, then maybe you can help them pay for half?) Or maybe they could just be announced as bridesmaids at your AHR in a dress that is special to them (that they may already own), so they could still participate without the added cost to anyone?

 

Maybe these are silly ideas I am suggesting, and I know it's tough to find a solution to this problem, but I wanted to at least grab at some straws and see if I could help! Sorry, and good luck Miss Holly!

[*HOLLY*]

I have talked to all the ladies and the feel bad they all cant go but more or less they dont want me upset they cant go. One of my BM said they know they wont be able to make and dont care they bought a dress they can only wear for the AHR. So that got me thinking yeah they wont be able to go on the cruise however they will be able to celebrate with me all night when I get home. They will be a bridal table and they will be announced as bridesmaids at the AHR. Most of them knew before they bought the dress they cant go so that makes me happy they are not getting upset for buying a dress!

[*HOLLY*]

Quote:

Originally Posted by islandbride317 Oh, Holly.....soory sorry to hear of your bridesmaid troubles, love! Everytime I hear about someone's BM drama, it makes me feel like I made the right decision not to have any myself -- there are just too many variables to deal with when trying to have a bridal party attend a DW, and the stress it causes (as you WELL-KNOW, I am sure!) is intense. I think if your friends can't attend, then maybe they shouldn't have to buy the dress (and if it means that much to you that they wear it for your AHR, then maybe you can help them pay for half?) Or maybe they could just be announced as bridesmaids at your AHR in a dress that is special to them (that they may already own), so they could still participate without the added cost to anyone? Maybe these are silly ideas I am suggesting, and I know it's tough to find a solution to this problem, but I wanted to at least grab at some straws and see if I could help! Sorry, and good luck Miss Holly!

Not silly ideas at all. I will be purchasing shoes and jewelry for them. If I have enough in the end I will pay back for the dress as much as I can or at least throw in something for the dress when they pick it up!

[luciel2820]

awww i know what youre going through.. i have told my friends more than a yr in advance about my wedding plans and theyve all said they'll go but i have a feeling some wont be able to make it last min... it also makes me sad cause i would love the ppl that i love to be there on such a special day to me, but i am having an

AHR and they will all be there to celebrate with me.. hope everything works out for you