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RSVP ettiquette?


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#1 michelle6114

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    Posted 25 August 2009 - 05:35 PM

    Ok so is this just people I know or what
    We are having an AHR in a private room at a nice italian restaurant. I sent out printed beach themed invites, matching rsvp cards (self addressed and pre-stamped) and directions how to get there. We sent out about 75 invites.
    Well, we have gotten back 15 so far. Out of the 15, 3 have come back without a name or return address on the envelope, so we have no clue who these people are. The rsvp card is simple, write the name and how many people are attending, right? Some of these people have just checked "will attend" without saying how many people total. I have never seen anything like it. How hard is it to fill this thing out properly? Are we supposed to call everyone from these 3 postmarked cities and ask if they sent back their cards blank? What is wrong with people? I spent a ton on postage and printing, trying to make it easy on all the guests.
    I guess every-day ettiquette is lacking in my crowd. I have even recieved wedding invites over the years where the rsvp card isn't pre-stamped. No biggie, but how hard is it to write your name and a number??

    #2 marryinghimagain

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      Posted 26 August 2009 - 11:52 AM

      I know this won't help you now but may in the future. I assigned each invitation a number. On my guest list, I had a number next to the invitee's name/s. I wrote this number in pencil on the back of the invitation way down in the bottom corner. I was then able to know whose invite it was when it came back w/o a name, which I also had a few of.
      But that doesn't help you now, does it? lol If you are having place cards, you will need their names. Maybe you will receive the responses from the other guests from the same city and be able to figure out who it is by process of elimination. If not, then you will probably have to call. If they didn't include the number attending, you probably will also need to call. How do people make something so difficult that should be so simple??

      #3 Lady_Di

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        Posted 26 August 2009 - 12:27 PM

        Some people can be just lazy, inconsiderate, too busy and etc...

        I would say to contact them, unfortunately.

        I always take time to send back any RSVP card I get!

        I wonder if I'm going to GET ANY RSVP on my wedding website if people can't take a minute to fill out a name and send the RSVP card back.

        #4 aimee!

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          Posted 26 August 2009 - 01:19 PM

          ahh! ohmygosh! how frustrating.
          i'm not sure i could be nice when calling people who filled out rsvp cards like that :)
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          #5 ~Debra~

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            Posted 26 August 2009 - 02:24 PM

            I completely feel you girl!! People are so inconsiderate when it comes to RSVPing. We had like 1/3 of our guests not RSVP and we ended up calling them to ask if they were coming & how many people were coming with them.

            And I have NO idea why send the RSVP card back and not write the number of people attending! Its very frustrating. No advice because I'm going through but I definitely feel your pain!

            #6 Jess

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              Posted 26 August 2009 - 05:08 PM

              yeah I agree - frustrating! I would call people I guess? I also put a pencil # inside each envelope like marryinghimagain and it has helped a lot.

              #7 Huey

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                Posted 27 August 2009 - 03:21 AM

                Boy that is insane - so how are you going to figure out whose RSVP's those are!?

                #8 Lashawn

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                  Posted 27 August 2009 - 04:53 AM

                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by marryinghimagain
                  I know this won't help you now but may in the future. I assigned each invitation a number. On my guest list, I had a number next to the invitee's name/s. I wrote this number in pencil on the back of the invitation way down in the bottom corner. I was then able to know whose invite it was when it came back w/o a name, which I also had a few of.
                  But that doesn't help you now, does it? lol If you are having place cards, you will need their names. Maybe you will receive the responses from the other guests from the same city and be able to figure out who it is by process of elimination. If not, then you will probably have to call. If they didn't include the number attending, you probably will also need to call. How do people make something so difficult that should be so simple??
                  That is a great idea, assigning a number.. why didn't I think of that :-(..hoping for the best.

                  #9 islandbride317

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                    Posted 27 August 2009 - 04:56 AM

                    Ugggh! What a mess...is there any way to tell from the postmark on the return/RSVP where it came from? That might help narrow it down, unless the majority of the people you've invited are all from the same area. Just a thought, since my FI currently works for the US Postal Service

                    Good luck, and thanks marryinghimagain -- I'll be sure to mark my RSVP postcards with a number before I send them out!

                    #10 michelle6114

                    michelle6114
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                      Posted 27 August 2009 - 08:16 AM

                      Hi again
                      There are 3 different cities, one of them looks like it was mailed from a train station in NYC (if thats possible?) and none of the cities actually match the addresses on the guests addresses. I suppose we can narrow it down eventually, but it is still frustrating, especially since we are doing a seating chart.
                      The hint about pre-marking the cards with a number sounds great. I hope all future brides do this!
                      Seriously, how hard is it to fill this thing out properly (I'm still ranting, lol)




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