7 replies to this topic

[JayBee]

This morning I was looking at photos of arches that my WC sent, and I had just found the perfect set up, on the beach with palms and orchids. ahhh... and just as i'm imagining our perfect ceremony, my phone rings...

It was my 2nd bridesmaid, she lives in tx. And she's pregnant. Fan-freaking-tastic! let's just say that this one of those unintentional things that happens. Not to mention that we joked no baby-making until AFTER the wedding! So besides that that my unmarried, unemployed currently shacked-up friend is now knocked up, I don't know if I can even be supportive, because it just seems so... i don't know... irresponsible, I guess. And saying that just makes me feel like a bad person, or a bad friend. ...

And on top of all those feelings, I'm full of anxiety, because what if I lose my MOH, or my minister? Also I don't have another person to ask to be a BM, which only leaves me w/ 1 maid.

I know this kind of thing happens all the time. I'm not the only one. That's why I'm venting this here.

[BachataBride]

That sucks when something unexpected comes up. But I surely hope you didn't say those things to your friend!! I'm sure she is thinking all those things on her own. You just need to be supportive of her. And only one maid is not so bad...I only have one. And if your FI is still having two then they can both walk with her. It will all be ok. Just breath...

[KatyKo]

So sorry that she won't be able to make it. I am suppose to have 4 BMs...one of them is probably not coming, and another may not come either. So FI will have 4 and I might only have 2...

No matter what...as long as you and FI are there...everyone else will be icing on the cake

Don't stress...just imagine that beautiful beach and the wonderful life you will begin there

[sunsetbride1]

Ooo.. hang in there!!!

I agree wth everyone else so far!! Be a supportive friend and know that your wedding is about you and Fh!

We lost 2 GM's already.. and my sister backed out too.

I just keep staying focused on the fact that this is our day.. if our friends and family can share it with us that's wonderful; if not, it will still be perfect bc we are there celebrating our love and life together.

[Maybride2009]

Lots of hugs!
I might lose my only BM, she is having financial difficulties, so that would leave me with my MOH and 2 GM, but that's ok with me if the party is uneven, I just hope that she can come

[JayBee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by sunsetbride1 Ooo.. hang in there!!! I agree wth everyone else so far!! Be a supportive friend and know that your wedding is about you and Fh! We lost 2 GM's already.. and my sister backed out too. I just keep staying focused on the fact that this is our day.. if our friends and family can share it with us that's wonderful; if not, it will still be perfect bc we are there celebrating our love and life together.

I'm really sorry that your sister backed out. That would break my heart... but you are absolutely right- this is about our marriage, not just the wedding. it's about the conscious effort we're making to have a better life together. And although we want to share that with our family & friends, we really only need each other...

I've come to terms with the fact that I'm losing a BM, but now I'm just having trouble being a supportive friend. I feel like I'm always having to be there for her (and she's always in some sort of turmoil), but she's never able to be there for me... This feels like another one of those times. I don't know... maybe i'm being too dramatic. I know I need to come around, but it's draining me emotionally.
I feel so blue!

[JaimeLynne]

I'm sorry! I know how you feel - at least you have a place to "vent" so that hopefully you don't go crazy IRL!

I just lost 1 of my BMs the other week, and another hasn't really been talking to me (she's not mad, just super busy with work I guess..) lately so don't know what's up there! All in all, I will be SO HAPPY if just my MOH and my other BM make it (they're already booked for their deposits so that's looking good so far!).

I try to keep this in mind from past BDW brides: "You won't remember who is not there, only the people who are!" I think this will definitely ring true. We all knew these things would happen going into something like this. It still is very heart-breaking at times, I know. But I take comfort in the fact that so many other girls that I've become close to on here dealt with their ups and downs and in spite of the downs still managed to have some of the most amazing weddings I've ever seen!

[Ava]

I'm sorry :/

My FH's niece (who is 28, not 10 or anything) had to back out because she was pregnant, and her first daughter was our flower girl. I'm happy for her, but I know FH is disappointed she won't be there (they are so close in age, they were raised like siblings).