advice needed - groom's bro's gf
Posted 28 January 2008 - 10:48 PM
my bachelorette party was this past sat. night...a few close friends went into nyc for dinner, drinks, etc.....
included in this group of close friends was fi's brother's girlfriend. they've been together for 4 1/2 years, and live together....fi's family HATES her...she's growing on me, but she lack social graces that normal people have (saying please and thank you), and doesn't really know how to talk to people.
however, she communicated well with some guy at a bar on saturday night - so well that she was tongue wrestling with him in the bar. she admitted to me that it wasn't the first guy she kissed since she's been w/ fi's bro, and also admitted that she's still annoyed at fi's bro b/c he got a lapdance at fi's bachelor party....we literally had to TEAR her away from him to get her to leave.
i grabbed her, and took her to the b-room when i saw what she was doing. i asked her if she knew what she was doing and if she wanted us to 'save' her. she said no, she liked this guy, she knew she shouldn't but he was so cute she couldn't resist.
i told fi when i got home; he didn't care...he thought it was effed up, but said we shouldn't tell his bro b/c it wasn't our business. i feel like it's my business - they are talking marriage and i was there, watching....this isn't a friend of a friend, or something like that - it's family now. my best friend said i should tell the girlfriend that she really needs to fess up. fi says if i really feel a moral obligation to say something, i should wait until after mexico (so about 4 weeks)...i also thought about having my best friend or my sister slip in mexico, b/c they have no attachment to any of these people.
so what would you do? i'm so confused!
(sorry so long, and tia for any advice!!!!)
Posted 28 January 2008 - 10:58 PM
Posted 28 January 2008 - 11:02 PM
Posted 28 January 2008 - 11:15 PM
Tulum..uhh I mean Cancun, MX
Posted 28 January 2008 - 11:23 PM
Something like that happened to me and my friend when she came to visit me. But I wouldnt tell her husband. Now they are happy with 2 kids. I can only imagine what their lives would be like if I had told.
Posted 28 January 2008 - 11:31 PM
Posted 29 January 2008 - 12:30 AM
Planning Pics! PV and Wedding ReviewPro Pics (1); Pro Pics (2) By Nataly Lemus Photography and Rodolfo Arpia Photography Teaser Pro Pics from Nataly Lemus PhotogaphyTeaser Pro Pics from Rodolfo Arpia Photography
Posted 29 January 2008 - 12:54 AM
Posted 29 January 2008 - 12:55 AM
Posted 29 January 2008 - 01:47 AM
2) if your FI does not want you to tell his brother, dont. you have to respect that. case closed. however, if you feel morally obligated, which i wouldnt blame you - i would too, i would also avoid having your sister or whoever slip and say something at your wedding. that is going to create a whole lotta drama you dont need on your day. my suggestion is that after the wedding, you personally take it up with the girl and tell her it really upset you, and that if she doesnt tell her BF then you will. give her some kind of time frame, and you can also tell her your FI knows about it and is prepared to tell his brother (she doesnt have to know the whole truth). she will be so scared that hopefully she will confess on her own. if she doesn't, well then you have to decide what is best for you and your FI to do in telling your BIL.
good luck, its a sticky situation for sure. let us know what you decide!
0 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users