I am in some serious need of advice right now. I am doubting my choice for my Maid of Honour.... Here is a bit of background: I have known her for about 5 years and she used to be my best friend, the last few years however, we have barely seen each other and she always uses the fact that we are both in school as an excuse; but even during the summer break I have only seen her twice. She has been together with her boyfriend for 11 years and I know it must have been hard for her to find out that I got engaged sooner than her. I never assumed that this could get in the way of her being excited for me so I asked her to be my MOH and she agreed. I thought she would be very happy for me, but it took her a good week and only after me texting her to meet up a few times she agreed to meet me for a quick coffee and talk. She told me she was going through some family issues and there was lots going on in her life so that's why she couldn't come see me sooner.
Anyway I told her that many people had been asking us about an engagement party but that my parents had already told me they would not be able to host it for us but would help us pay for the wedding instead; I guess part of me was hoping that she would offer to organize it but she never did and I ended up saying I was going to organize it myself. Her response was oh so you are having an engagement party & a bridal shower & a destination wedding? That will be too expensive for people. I said I wasn't expecting any gifts for the engagement party and I mainly wanted to do it so that close family and friends could get together and celebrate. She didn't seem too excited. I then told her how I wanted to do a bridesmaids meet and greet and we set up a date. She didn't offer to help plan anything for the meet and greet and it wasn't until I called her the day before to ask her if she thought I should get anything else and told her how other bridesmaids were bringing a few snacks and drinks, that's when she offered to bring a few snacks.
That was the last time I heard from her about the wedding or about anything at all. She didn't come to my birthday, which did hurt me a little because on her birthday I kept my whole day open and she said she wasn't doing anything even though I told her I would like to take her out for dinner and could even bring our guys along. I bought her a cake which we ate at the bridesmaids meet and greet, and for my birthday she went camping a few days before but was supposed to be back and ended up staying the extra day.
I am starting to get the feeling that we aren't as close as before and that maybe my expectations were a little bit too high. I thought she would be very excited for me and would want to plan everything together, because that is what I would have done for her.
I have two sisters and one of them was a little hurt that I didn't choose her as my MOH, so now I am starting to regret my decision and kind of wish I had chosen my sister instead.
Is there a way to tell her I changed my mind without ending the friendship? Or should I just tough it out and deal with it?