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I want 3 BM, FI wants one. Help!

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10 replies to this topic

#1 SonyaR

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  • 299 posts

    Posted 20 April 2010 - 11:20 AM

    I need advise on this. I have 3 best friends I have grown up with. One is my cousin who I've always said will be my MOH as she is like a sister to me. My other girlfriend I met in pre-kindergarten and the other in high school. I would love to have all 3 in my wedding party but my FI only wants his brother as he does not have close friends like I do.

    Is it weird if we have 3 bridesmaids and 1 best man?

    I also have 2 really good male friends who are also friends with my FI and I have suggested we ask them to stand up for both of us but on the guys side and he said he think about it but never seems to want to give me an answer when I bring it up.

    What should I do?

    #2 boscobel

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      Posted 20 April 2010 - 11:22 AM

      My personal opinion is that the sides don't have to match. I had 3 BM's and 5 GM's at the wedding in Jamaica and then 7 BM's and 5 GM's at the AHR. I think it's more about having the important people standing by you, then about matching sides.

      #3 JUSTUSTWO


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        Posted 20 April 2010 - 11:27 AM

        It is not weird at all & I totally agree with Carly. I was in the same boat & was going to have more BM's than GM's. Everyone here convinced me that being uneven was no big deal & it wouldn't look funny.
        In the end, I had 1 MOH & DH had 1 BM, but had I decided to have a larger bridal party, it would have been uneven & I would not have had a problem with doing it that way.

        #4 AishaB

        • Sr. Member
        • 2,350 posts

          Posted 20 April 2010 - 12:01 PM

          I dont think they have to match. Two girls can walk up individually and then maybe the MOH and BM can walk up together. I think that will be fine. I totally understand your predicament though.

          I have my sister who automatically thought she was going to be my MOH and then I have two best friends. My one friend who I have known longer had already started saying, she knew that she was my MOH so everyone else should step aside. Well, I am happy to say that for budgetary reasons I was able to take the punk way out. I am not having any BMs at all. Which makes my life much easier. I have four sisters (and we are all very close) plus my two really good friends. I have no lack of help with wedding planning and I will be asking my two friends to be ushers.

          Good luck!
          BDW the best place for my TYPE A personality!

          #5 mnh1983

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          • 743 posts

            Posted 20 April 2010 - 12:45 PM

            I don't think the sides have to match. My fiance and I initially said we were just going to have one each, but now he wants more. I don't want to add anyone else, mostly because I think it is tacky to ask someone after everyone knows you are just having one, but now he refuses to add anyone to his side unless I do because he doesn't want it to "look weird." I never thought I'd see a guy get so emotional about evenness!

            #6 MDLady

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            • 433 posts

              Posted 20 April 2010 - 02:43 PM

              The sides don't have to match but I know that I actually would like them to.. It's just nicer that way but it is not the end of the world by any means if it doesn't happen. If you are anxious about it, just ask your fiance again if he is up for having the 2 guy friends in the wedding just to make you feel better. And if it's not a huge deal to you, then don't sweat it. Whatever the numbers end up being, it will be beautiful :)

              #7 hunniebee724

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              • 340 posts

                Posted 20 April 2010 - 03:49 PM

                I have 4 on my side and FI has 5 on his, but his best man may not be able to make it because he's deployed and my maid of honor is having financial difficulties and may not make it up here from Georgia (she's a non-sailing guest)....either way it will be uneven. I'm not worried about how it looks though. I want the pictures to focus on me and FI anyway lol.

                #8 SonyaR

                • Jr. Member
                • 299 posts

                  Posted 20 April 2010 - 10:09 PM

                  Yeah, thanks girls. I feel so much better and spoke to my FI about it and he said sure, have uneven numbers. I can't wait to ask them. Now I have to think of a cute way to ask them.

                  #9 skadow

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                    Posted 23 April 2010 - 01:42 PM

                    Originally Posted by SonyaR
                    Yeah, thanks girls. I feel so much better and spoke to my FI about it and he said sure, have uneven numbers. I can't wait to ask them. Now I have to think of a cute way to ask them.

                    Congrats! and remember...Your the bride..Do what you want anyways =)

                    #10 Diva

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                      Posted 23 April 2010 - 01:47 PM

                      I am in the same boat! I have 3 BMs and he has NO GM!! So I have dealt with the fact that it will be uneven, and oh well!!

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