| Originally Posted by Amarillis |
I have heard of this, and would say that it is the norm.
I would definately question the bride by asking "why can't we choose a different resort", if the response was "so I (as the bride) can save $ per plate", my honest answer would be ok, then we'll kindly decline the invite.
If you cannot afford to cover the cost of your guests -- whether at an at home wedding or a destination, then you should rethink your choice, or drum down the guest list. It really is simple.
In a sense this relates back to 'at home non-DW brides' having an expectation that if each plate costs $x, then the gifts from guests should at least cover the per plate cost, this simply is not the case.
Weddings are about having the celebration you want, with the people you want, in a capacity that the bride and groom can afford. With no expectation of 'coming out ahead'.
Sorry if this is harsh, but I truly believe it is a reality.
Keeping with your dinner plate analogy - I think the question to ask is would you pay extra for someone who wanted say a lobster dinner when you have already pre-ordered & paid for a stuffed chicken dinner?? KWIM? She is not asking guests to pay for their meals, but for the guests who go outside of the pre-arranged plans to pay for their passes & extra costs to meals. Personally, I would make the guests pay for their day passes and then see if the resort will eat up the extra costs for the meals.