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"YOU MUST STAY AT PPR!! " - Bride says to Guest???


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#11 BachataBride

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    Posted 21 August 2009 - 10:46 PM

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Amarillis
    I have heard of this, and would say that it is the norm.

    I would definately question the bride by asking "why can't we choose a different resort", if the response was "so I (as the bride) can save $ per plate", my honest answer would be ok, then we'll kindly decline the invite.

    If you cannot afford to cover the cost of your guests -- whether at an at home wedding or a destination, then you should rethink your choice, or drum down the guest list. It really is simple.

    In a sense this relates back to 'at home non-DW brides' having an expectation that if each plate costs $x, then the gifts from guests should at least cover the per plate cost, this simply is not the case.

    Weddings are about having the celebration you want, with the people you want, in a capacity that the bride and groom can afford. With no expectation of 'coming out ahead'.

    Sorry if this is harsh, but I truly believe it is a reality.
    I have to disagree as well Amy...

    Keeping with your dinner plate analogy - I think the question to ask is would you pay extra for someone who wanted say a lobster dinner when you have already pre-ordered & paid for a stuffed chicken dinner?? KWIM? She is not asking guests to pay for their meals, but for the guests who go outside of the pre-arranged plans to pay for their passes & extra costs to meals. Personally, I would make the guests pay for their day passes and then see if the resort will eat up the extra costs for the meals.

    #12 MilitaryMrs.s-to be

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      Posted 22 August 2009 - 10:45 AM

      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Amarillis
      I have heard of this, and would say that it is the norm.

      I would definately question the bride by asking "why can't we choose a different resort", if the response was "so I (as the bride) can save $ per plate", my honest answer would be ok, then we'll kindly decline the invite.

      If you cannot afford to cover the cost of your guests -- whether at an at home wedding or a destination, then you should rethink your choice, or drum down the guest list. It really is simple.

      In a sense this relates back to 'at home non-DW brides' having an expectation that if each plate costs $x, then the gifts from guests should at least cover the per plate cost, this simply is not the case.

      Weddings are about having the celebration you want, with the people you want, in a capacity that the bride and groom can afford. With no expectation of 'coming out ahead'.

      Sorry if this is harsh, but I truly believe it is a reality.

      I don't think anybody is trying to "come out ahead" Its all just keeping everything within budget...With us, the place we originally wanted to go was an extra $85 per person above 14 people, we have 24 confrimed and we had no problem paying the extra for the ten over that, however we had another 10 people that wanted to wait until the week before we leave and get a vacation at around $800 bucks for the week, so that would be another $850 for their meal and $600 for their day passes all on top of what we already paid for our wedding. I just don't feel like its fair to us or to my guests who paid top dollar to come down to the wedding, for those guys to pay next to nothing and still get to come to the wedding for free. Like I said, if they were booked with us I would have no problem paying for the extra to the resort. Thats just how I feel. Sorry.

      #13 nmoreau

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        Posted 22 August 2009 - 11:58 AM

        It s a tough call but you know your guests the best.
        In my opinion if it is a day pass issue I would have the guest pay for choosing to stay elsewhere. If it is a resort reception, wedding package issue I think that is the reponsibilty of the bride and groom just as choosing a private reception with a per guest fee.

        #14 Outdoor_girl1010

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          Posted 23 August 2009 - 09:42 PM

          I will tell you with the aqua package after 20 people you will have to pay for each dinner over that. So depending on how many people come you will have to pay for that, but the people who don't say will still have to pay for there day pass.
          Cory & Jennifer
          March 13, 2010Punta Cana D.R.!!http://i150.photobuc....3/IMG_6740.jpg

          #15 MexicoBeachBride2010

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            Posted 24 August 2009 - 09:13 AM

            Are you set on PPR? I know it is pricier than some of the other resorts. Could you get married at a different resort that's more cost effective than you and your fiance go to the PPR for your honeymoon portion? Just a thought! I picked the majestic colonial for my wedding since it was better for families, price was good, etc. but my fiance and I are moving over to the elegance side to the club adults section for 7 nights after the wedding. I would have done my wedding on that side but it was more money for our guests. This is a tough situation but realize whatever you decide you have to be happy with. If some guests don't come will you be ok with that? Good luck!

            #16 BachataBride

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              Posted 24 August 2009 - 09:31 AM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by MexicoBeachBride2010
              Are you set on PPR? I know it is pricier than some of the other resorts. Could you get married at a different resort that's more cost effective than you and your fiance go to the PPR for your honeymoon portion? Just a thought! I picked the majestic colonial for my wedding since it was better for families, price was good, etc. but my fiance and I are moving over to the elegance side to the club adults section for 7 nights after the wedding. I would have done my wedding on that side but it was more money for our guests. This is a tough situation but realize whatever you decide you have to be happy with. If some guests don't come will you be ok with that? Good luck!
              Great advice!!! As an addition to this - know that you cannot please EVERYONE with anything that you chose! But if there is someone that has to be there, you should discuss all options with them. Good Luck! :)

              #17 Stamperamma

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                Posted 24 August 2009 - 10:17 AM

                I have to agree with what some of the other brides are saying. If I was told this is the resort I must stay at and I had chosen a different location for whatever reason, I would simply decline the invite.

                #18 Amarillis

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                  Posted 24 August 2009 - 10:47 AM

                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by BachataBride
                  I have to disagree as well Amy...

                  Keeping with your dinner plate analogy - I think the question to ask is would you pay extra for someone who wanted say a lobster dinner when you have already pre-ordered & paid for a stuffed chicken dinner?? KWIM? She is not asking guests to pay for their meals, but for the guests who go outside of the pre-arranged plans to pay for their passes & extra costs to meals. Personally, I would make the guests pay for their day passes and then see if the resort will eat up the extra costs for the meals.
                  I really do think and maintain that this is one in the same. The Lobster/chicken comparison is precisely what I mean.. but in this light.

                  Scenario:
                  2 Brides, same budget
                  Bride A chooses chicken as the main course
                  Bride B chooses lobster as the main course (knowing that she may go into debt)

                  Bride B is the kind of bride that will pipe up and complain about guests gifts, as the gifts were not enough to cover the per plate costs.

                  Translate that into the current situation.

                  The Bride is booking a resort, where the day passes cost $X. The Bride KNOWS that she has chosen a premium (+$400) above average resort, and is anticipating that some guests may choose to lodge elsewhere.

                  This is more than she can afford on her budget, and she is looking for guests to cover the balance.

                  In my opinion this is unacceptable and not any different than the chicken/lobster bride.

                  The poster that said - consider choosing the premium resort for your honeymoon has hit the nail on the head... this is how you can live within your means.

                  #19 BachataBride

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                    Posted 24 August 2009 - 11:28 AM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by Amarillis
                    I really do think and maintain that this is one in the same. The Lobster/chicken comparison is precisely what I mean.. but in this light.

                    Scenario:
                    2 Brides, same budget
                    Bride A chooses chicken as the main course
                    Bride B chooses lobster as the main course (knowing that she may go into debt)

                    Bride B is the kind of bride that will pipe up and complain about guests gifts, as the gifts were not enough to cover the per plate costs.

                    Translate that into the current situation.

                    The Bride is booking a resort, where the day passes cost $X. The Bride KNOWS that she has chosen a premium (+$400) above average resort, and is anticipating that some guests may choose to lodge elsewhere.

                    This is more than she can afford on her budget, and she is looking for guests to cover the balance.

                    In my opinion this is unacceptable and not any different than the chicken/lobster bride.

                    The poster that said - consider choosing the premium resort for your honeymoon has hit the nail on the head... this is how you can live within your means.
                    Ummm...I don't kwow if we are talking about the same thing here.
                    I was more or less saying that the bride has made a choice, and if the guests choose something other than what the bride has planned then she should not be responsible for the extra costs incurred.
                    Anyhoo...we can agree to disagree on this one Amy!

                    #20 Lindsay521

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                      Posted 24 August 2009 - 12:18 PM

                      I am getting married at the PPR in March 2010. We have 43 people coming so far and 14 of my guests are staying at the NH Real which is right next door. Although this was not our first choice (obviously we prefer everyone at the same hotel) it is the price we have to pay for having our wedding at one of the nicest and most expensive resorts on the island. It was more important for us to have it at the PPR and have it be amazing then to settle for somewhere else we did not love as much.
                      We are aware of the fee that guests will have to pay if not staying at the hotel and we are willing to pay this for the day of the wedding. I spoke with Teresa in length on Friday and she explained to me exactly how it works with guests from other hotels so let me know if you want more information but basically it costs $24 + 16% tax per person. So it is costing us about another $400 and we are willing to pay this.
                      I do not think this is outrageous at all but everyone has different priorities!!!
                      Lindsay and Seth
                      March 28, 2010 - Paradisus Palma Real, Punta Cana




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