Need some advice!
Posted 25 November 2008 - 11:54 PM
One of my best friends got engaged several months ago and then she was sent out to Iraq (she's in the army). Then I got engaged while she was away. On a side note, we're in each other's bridal party's. She told me she was planning for Feb/Mar 2010 but was going to set an actual date when she returned. She told me to go ahead and select a date. I let her know that we were thinking of end of 2009 or beginning of 2010 but finally decided on Jan 2010 (that's the only time my family from Europe can come). She seemed fine with that but she just returned home (thankfully safely) and left me a message saying that she's surprised that I want my wedding so close to hers. I've called her twice, sent an email and still have not heard from her. I don't understand why she's so upset. Am I in the wrong for wanting to get married in January? errrrrrrrrr. This is too much drama for me!
Thanks for your help!
Posted 26 November 2008 - 12:30 AM
I would just let it go, not worth getting upset about. Perhaps she is dealing with other things and is easily agitated.
Posted 26 November 2008 - 12:46 AM
This did cause some tension within the family and was a concern financially.
The bottom line is you have to do what is best for you. You gave her fair warning saying that you were looking at late 09/ early 10. You also have ample time to start saving for both weddings. You have to consider if it is worth it to have a friend at your wedding and not you family.
I don't think this needs to be a dramatic situation if you can get it addressed soon and are open with each other as planning goes on. Like Yari said, she probably has a lot on her plate right now and very sensitive. I would let it go for now and try not to read anything into it. I hope you can get everything resolved. Good luck!
Posted 26 November 2008 - 09:40 AM
Thanks for your advice!
Posted 26 November 2008 - 07:30 PM
I do hope things work out.
Posted 26 November 2008 - 08:05 PM
2) if january is the only time when your family from europe can come, then that is the only time! that's what's best for you.
she should have NO bearing on your decision. she told you to go ahead and pick a date- now she doesnt like the date you picked. someone should be telling her she cant have her cake & eat it too. instead she should be happy she has someone to go through this with who is on a similar timeline. you two could really help & encourage each other if she would drop the bullshit act.
Posted 26 November 2008 - 08:16 PM
Just let it go - she'll probably get over it in time. She might just be bugged by other things right now and will see the bigger picture at some point.
Posted 28 November 2008 - 10:01 AM
If she's just come back from Iraq there will be all sorts of shit going around her head and probably the wedding isn't the biggest part of that. You have no idea what she saw and what situations she found herself in. I only know this cause FI is in the army and I have friends that have been killed over there.
Keep trying to contact her once you get through you'll probably find that isn't so much of a problem and it was just the tip of the iceberg.
Posted 28 November 2008 - 11:16 PM
Posted 03 December 2008 - 10:41 PM
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