My FI says "he is feeling trapped"...
Posted 26 June 2008 - 04:35 PM
while a therapist is a great idea in theory, i know that my dh would never go for it unless i blindfolded him and dragged him in. however, if you're both willing, you can work on resolving this yourselves. i think you both need to lay it out on the table and form a plan. if you're like dh and i, it will involve a lot of yelling, tissues, and maybe even some door slamming, but at the end of the day, it's all out in the open. your plan will have to involve working on yourselves (losing weight, feeling sexier, etc) and working together (talking about why he's feeling trapped, rather than accusing you of trapping, maybe going to ww together).
nothing will make it disappear if you don't deal with it.
that being said, we'll support you the whole way.
Posted 26 June 2008 - 04:40 PM
| Originally Posted by Dez921714 |
Everyone seems so soooo happy and in love...makes me wonder about us...
Just try talking to him about what's on his mind. Have a heart to heart. Planning a wedding can be so stressful.
Not everything is "paradise" and NO relationship is perfect, dear. NONE.
Posted 03 July 2008 - 03:51 PM
Threatened to take all the money out of our joint account, so I moved all but $280 into my account and changed my password (I don't want payments to bounce).
It's all BS and I don't deserve to put up with this. I think I'm done. I don't know how or what I'll say if/when he comes back but I can't keep putting myself through this. I love him, but is it worth it?
Posted 03 July 2008 - 03:52 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 03:57 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 04:07 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 04:18 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 04:20 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 04:30 PM
Posted 03 July 2008 - 04:38 PM
Now, I agree with the suggestion that you should at least get counseling for yourself. Your FI will follow, IF he's ready to make change. If not, and you two do decide to part ways, just know that you will be OK and things will get easier over time. We all have our issues, and sometimes as women we take on our mate's issues, to our own detriment. Trust me, I know about the over the top yelling and arguments and actually taking action to leave. I had to question whether or not it is worth it also. There is something to sticking out the fight, especially since knowing that no relationship is perfect, but you have to decide for yourself if this is healthy for the both of you.
I know he left and things aren't good, but give him time to chill out and give yourself time to think. Follow your heart...and mind.
Sorry you're going through this. I do know how trying these times are.
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