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Snswedding2016 Planning Thread - Jan 9 2016 (Azul Fives)


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@@veryvalentine @@yycbride2016 @@ashhtayy @@acw271011 @@TinkerSofi @@krystalball @@maybeoneday

 

Thanks so much ladies for all your kinds words!! We had such an amazing time during the shoot and with 3 hours we didn't feel rushed to get our photos done by a certain time. We had time to relax and just explore the grounds. I can't thank my photographer and friend enough! She is a great photographer but also just an awesome person to hang out with. It was the best way to end the long weekend! I feel like I'm still on a high from it! :)


I also can't wait to meet you Toronto ladies very soon for drinks!  :D


@@veryvalentine loved your chandler reference - made me LOL! Love that episode!!

 

I definitely recommend doing an engagement shoot if you're on the fence, I know I was until both of these opportunities presented themselves. It really gets you comfortable in front of the camera - great practice for the big day. You also just have a lot of time to focus on you and your fiancé and get excited about your wedding! It's also a nice break from the planning stress!

Edited by snswedding2016
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So it seems like a couple of us are having some bridal party issues these days. I almost feel silly posting this because it really isn't that big of a deal but the situation did upset me so here we go...

 

So for over a month I've been trying to organize a bridesmaids day. Two of my girls still need their dresses (I've let them pick their own style but staying within a colour palette). One bridesmaid asked me if I would go shopping with her and I thought that would be a great opportunity to plan a bridesmaids day. We were going to go for brunch in the morning, shop for dresses, maybe work on the OOT bags and then go see something silly like Magic Mike XXL - haha! I thought it would be a really fun day to hang out with the girls especially because I haven't done anything like this since I've been engaged. It took some planning with everyone's schedules and the fact that one of my maids of honour has two kids, the youngest one only 1 1/2 months old but we finally settled on this Sunday. 

 

I feel like I've been a pretty low maintenance bride when it comes to planning and organizing and mostly by choice. I love planning and sometimes I'm too ahead of the game and get things done so quickly that those who wanted to help don't get the chance. I realized that when some of my girls were a little sad they weren't there to go dress shopping with me. i've mentioned it before but the thought of wedding dress shopping has always overwhelmed me and so I went on my own to custom design it. I felt bad that my girls missed out on that part of the process that they wanted to have. All of the other sourcing, shopping and planning I've pretty much done on my own. My maids of honour have come with me to some dress appointments and we've gone accessories shopping but that's pretty much it. This is why I thought this day would be great way to spend time together doing some wedding stuff. 

 

So today I get a call from one of my maids of honour asking me what time the dress appointment was on Sunday (this MOH has her dress already). She said she wanted to confirm the dress appointment time because her boyfriend's family is planning a surprise birthday party for her boyfriend's dad on Sunday. She wanted to know if she could do both (you read what we had planned for the day though right...umm..). I told her I was pretty sure it was 1 or 2 and she was like "oh...we'll you're going for brunch right? So I'll just come to that but I won't go to the dress appointment because I already have mine and that way I can go to the party". To be honest was shocked and a bit stunned. It was so much about going to the birthday party - I totally get wanting to be there for your partner's dad's birthday but it was how she went about it. There was no apology for just finding out now about the party and that she feels bad for missing out on the day we had planned. She almost laughed it off, as if it was going to be a waste for her to be there anyway. To be fair she may have forgotten or didn't realize that this was this important to me but honestly that makes me a little more annoyed. I've been engaged since October and this is the only thing for the wedding that I have planned in advance with my bridal party to do as a group. I feel like I she should have at least realized that this would be really disappointing to me. 

 

Not to mention that aside from the fact that I haven't had any wedding planning requests (with now less than 5 months left) that I've lost two bridesmaids in the process. I'm not mad about this particular situation or the other two having to drop out for very good reasons, I'm just really disappointed. This bridal party situation just starts to feel pretty sad and pathetic. I know I'm probably being hyper sensitive about this situation but I was just really looking forward to this Sunday after everything and now this happens.

 

Despite this particular situation this MOH has been really great and she's super excited to be a MOH and plan a shower and bachelorette. Somehow she just doesn't see how this weekend is important to me. To be honest if she approached it differently today saying she just found out and she doesn't know what to do about the situation because she should and wants to be at the party, I would have told her to go...but it just wasn't handled that way. 

 

The other issue that I feel really helpless about is that I have two MOHs. We've all known each other for the same length of time - we went to university together. I want both of them up there as MOH and I couldn't choose between them. Although we have know each other from the same place, I have different friendships with the two of them. The one with kids, we were friends since second year and became close friends very quickly. She was my go to place to crash when I didn't want to commute back to the suburbs from downtown. I treat her kids like my own - her oldest daughter is our flower girl. I'm actually one of the few people she actually refers to as auntie and we're not blood related. The other MOH and I were friends in university but we've really become close in the last 5 years. 5 years ago the other MOH got married and we were so thrilled for her but the two of us were in terrible relationships that we were convincing ourselves were not as terrible as they were. A couple months after we both broke up with our men (within weeks of each other) and that really brought us closer together. We were back on the dating market at the same time, we helped each other through heartbreak and new relationships. She was at a place that my other MOH was not and so it really shaped our friendship. 

 

I just found out tonight that it hasn't been easy being co-MOHs. I guess I should have seen that coming but I figured them being such close friends too it wouldn't be an issue. Apparently one feels like she isn't really getting a hand in planning and that the other one has taken over with her ideas. Or that she didn't think the other MOH would want to speak during the MOH speech because she is shy. I just want them both to feel like they are MOHs but maybe that's impossible and I'm living in a fantasyland. They also both hate confrontation so I know they won't talk to each other about it. I guess I should just let it go but I don't want one of them to feel left out. 

 

I know! I know! these really aren't that big a deal but it's starting to feel like it is all piling up. By the end of today I was feeling really emotional about it and disappointed that it isn't working out the way I hoped it would. Sean's also away right now on a boy's trip and he would be the one to console me about this. We talked a lot about this tonight and I feel a bit better but I just miss him too. Sigh.

 

@ I'm really feeling for ya! Emotional day for MOHs today...

 

sorry ladies for the crazy long venting session....there is no judgement if you skip this post to the next one that will hopefully be a little more upbeat!

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Updates and To Do List:

 

Last night I met up with a bunch of the Toronto BDW brides for drinks and it was great!! I really hope we can do another girls night soon! There were a bunch of girls from the other end of the table that I didn't really get to talk to that much so we'll definitely need another catch up.  :) (see the GTA brides meet up thread for pics!)

 

The planned Bridesmaids day - so I ended up talking to my co-MOH about it and reminded her that it was supposed to be a whole day. Apparently she completely forgot, which was slightly annoying but at least she didn't purposely back out knowing that it was supposed to be a big day. In the end when she realized she changed her plan immediately and said should wouldn't miss it. It was good to talk to her about it and realize that she really wanted to be involved. After all that was settled I found out that my other bridesmaid's father isn't doing very well. He's been battling cancer for a while and he's taken a bit of turn for the worse. I'm really hoping he pulls through and sending them lots of good vibes. She said she wasn't sure if she could make it on Sunday but that she would try but I told her not to worry about that at all! In the end I'm just going with one Maid of honour to go dress shopping and having lunch. It will be a nice day to spend together nonetheless!

 

Room Upgrade - I don't think I posted this earlier but after we upgraded our deluxe pool view to the 1 bedroom suite, that qualified us for the sky suite!! Woohoo!! I'm so excited!! We were really hoping to get the upgrade to the sky suite so that we could host mini events up on the rooftop deck.

 

post-281055-0-51584600-1439684945_thumb.jpg

 

 

New bookings and cancellations - It turns out that one of Sean's sisters may be backing out. She has a condition that she's been dealing with for a long time and we thought this might happen. We'll see it's still not official but at the moment it isn't looking good which means that right now only one of his siblings will be at the wedding. It's been tough for him and he might ask his biological dad to see if he can help out to get them there but I'm not holding my breath. I would pay for them if we could but as it stands we're already paying for his mom and step dad and my mom's trips which is a huge chunk of our budget.

 

I think I've mentioned that two women of our confirmed guest list found out after putting down deposits that they were pregnant and obviously can no longer attend the wedding. So right now we have some 'maybes' who still need to book and I've been trying to get them to fill those rooms so that the new bookings get the same rate and that the people who can't go anymore don't have to lose their deposits. This week we had one new booking that has taken over one of the rooms and I think we'll be able to fill the second one too. 

 

Getaways - Sean and I both had little mini trips planned with friends. He went on a boys trip to Ottawa/Montreal/Mont Tremblant and I went to NYC to visit a friend. It was so nice to get away for a couple of days and visit with a close friend who I haven't really had a good catch up session like that in a looonge time. She just found out that she'll be in a production in the winter which is super exciting but it also means she won't be able to make it to the wedding. Her and her husband will be playing and singing our first dance song (recorded) so at least I'll have a part of her there on our big day. 

 

We're also going to Mexico next month for the Brides Dress Rehearsal at Azul Fives - I'm getting excited to finally see the resort in person and I think that's when Sean is going to kick it into high gear for his side of the planning. haha 

 

Alt. to sand ceremony - Sean and I have been toying with an alternative ceremony to do rather than a sand ceremony or unity candle. We're thinking of either a unity cocktail or unity grilled cheese (although the grilled cheese will be harder to maintain until we need it - it might just get really soggy :wacko: ). 

 

Azul Fives garden gazebo - I received the gazebo dimensions for anyone who needs it in the garden. We might want to hang some items from the top of it so I wanted to know the height.

 

post-281055-0-57554900-1439685190_thumb.jpg

 

The To Do List:

 

I still feel like there is so much to do but I feel like I'm really moving slowly through everything. Work is really busy and I'm finding it hard to put in the time to wedding plan. I try and make myself feel better that when I read about all of you planning...it's like I'm planning for mine as well. lol!

 

-Finalize legal ceremony (trying to figure out a date so that our witnesses can be there)

-Organize getting our groomsmen to order their outfits (items chosen already - not sure if we want to gift it to them as we can't think of any gift ideas for the groomsmen yet)

-Sean's outfit - go shopping or decide to go with original plan from Moore's (I want to make sure he loves what he's wearing)

-Go shopping with my mom to finalize her outfit (she hates shopping, so this is a bit of a task haha)

-Summer shopping - bathing suits, more sun dresses etc.

-Music - get recorded music from my in laws and friends (ceremony music and first dance song) 

            - make CDs of recorded music as favours

-Finalize playlist -get programmed into QLab
-Wedding bands!!!! (we've been shopping on and off and I think we need to finally make a decision)

 

This is what I'm thinking of right now. Picture the one on the far right in white gold.

post-281055-0-54559000-1439685211_thumb.jpg

 

-Work on paper items (welcome letter, itinerary, menu, wedding programs etc. -we're going to wait until after the BDR in Mexico next month) - @ I may be sending you a message through your etsy site

-Other DIY projects - centrepiece quotes on candles, Mr & Mrs sign?, other signs on guest book table?

-Finish putting together OOT bags

-Still need to find some books for centrepieces (old hard covers...I'm being picky - I'm on the hunt for blue books only)

-Remind guests about final payments, renewing passports, tips before we leave

-Travel insurance for our parents (they have health conditions so it is easier to wait until we pay the for trips in full)

-Marriage license 

-Write Vows!!!!

-Keep paying for the wedding in chunks - month by month!! ;)

Edited by snswedding2016
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Oh I'm so far behind in the threads! I've missed so much over the last 2 weeks!

 

It was so much fun to meet you last night! I really hope we get another chance to do it again!

 

I'm really sorry that you've had drama with your bridal party too. I hate it for all of you. It's awful that the plans didn't come together the way it should have, especially since you planned it ahead of time! I hope you and your MOH have a lovely day tomorrow!! It will be well deserved! I wish I had some words of wisdom for all of you but I don't. I really wonder if it's because it's a destination wedding that seems to make all of these bridal parties so uncooperative! I just don't think they fully understand that just because it's being held somewhere else doesn't mean there is any less planning work. Well, there is a bit less but there are still things that need to be done.

 

I hope your numbers work out ok. I know we say that we understand that people can't make it for various reasons whether money or time off or whatever, but when it actually does happen it doesn't make it any less disappointing. I hope you can fill the empty spots and keep your numbers where you want them to be.

 

You absolutely have to give a report on AF when you get back. As much as I love the resort we picked I'm still just a tiny, tiny bit disappointed about AF. I so had my heart set on that pier lol So you have to take some pics!

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Your to do list has also really shrunk! lol

 

I love the bands but I'm absolutely partial to the sparkly one! I think they look so elegant, especially with an e-ring as pretty as yours.

 

I have to ask - what's Qlab? I've never heard of that.

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@@acw271011 It was great meeting you too!! I really hope we can arrange for another get together!

 

Thanks for all the support on the bridal party front. It's all coming together and we had a great day today even though we were missing one. There has been more bridal party drama with the one that is no longer a bridesmaid due to her planning on getting pregnant....but that's a much longer story for another day. 

 

I hope we maintain our numbers too!! Fingers crossed!

 

I will definitely give a full report on AF when we return at the end of Sept. I'm so excited to go!  :)

 

My other MOH has her dress now!! Yay!! This is one of my best friend's who has just given birth in June so she was waiting until the end of summer to look for a dress. She was nervous - she gets easily overwhelmed by this kind of shopping but luckily she found some great options and picked one today! 

 

post-281055-0-26037700-1439785331_thumb.jpg

 

I love it - it's really pretty with nice detail on the back. My MOH likes it and looks great in it and I can tell she feels comfortable in it so I'm so happy that she has her dress now!

 

I also picked up swatches from david's of the palette although the malibu doesn't look at all like it does on dresses for some reason.

 

post-281055-0-69097800-1439785438_thumb.jpg

 

Malibu is the one on the far right but on dresses it looks like this (all the dresses in the store looked like this blue):

 

post-281055-0-14489000-1439785529_thumb.jpg

 

This is also my other bridesmaid's dress 

 

We have one more bridesmaid to order her dress but she's the one whose dad isn't doing so well. I'm a little nervous that she doesn't have hers yet but I know it will all work itself out. The dress my MOH ordered today will come in by the latest on Dec 6th (which is a bit close to the wedding but should be fine). 

 

Post-reception dress: I've been debating on getting a second dress to wear after the reception. Our reception will be in the garden until 10pm and then after we'll be heading to the bar/lounge for more dancing. I have been thinking about changing into a short dress. I found a really cute Marilyn Monroe inspired dress and it was only $100.

 

 post-281055-0-72300700-1439785892_thumb.png

 

To finish up the day we went to see Magic Mike XXL - hehe...there was a lot of giggling! :P

Edited by snswedding2016
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Both dresses are gorgeous!! I absolutely LOVE the bridesmaid dress with the ruffle down the back! That's so pretty!! Your after dress is beautiful and is perfect for later in the evening! Malibu is the colour I'm using too, along with Begonia which is the hot pink or fuchsia. But yes, I find sometimes the colours just don't match up with the samples.

 

I'm glad your day out went well. And giggling at Magic Mike is a good sign! Will definitely have to check it out!

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Glad the day went well. All the dresses are lovely. You'll find with David's Bridal they don't seem to match because the swatch is satin and most of the dresses are chiffon! That was my experience anyways.

 

Hopefully not to much drama from the ex bridal party member :/

 

Her dress should come in waaaaay before December :)

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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