Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  
cfinkenbine

When To Have Children?

Recommended Posts

I found an old thread on this…but it is a topic I have really been wondering about. How long after you get married are you planning on trying to have children? My FI and I will both be 23 when we get married, and will have been together for over 5 years. We have lived together for 3. I have been itching to have a baby for quite some time, and have agreed to wait until we are married. That being said the FI and I have both agreed we would like to start having children immediately after we get married. I have discussed this with my mom, and she seems very unsupportive. While she said it is OUR decision, she thinks we need to wait a few years after getting married before having kids. I want a large family, and I want to be a younger mom (I would 24 at the earliest and even this is older than what I would have liked!) What are everyone else's plans on starting a family?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We won't be having any children together as I have twins from a past relationship. They are close to 9 years old. Given our ages (34,40) and those of my kids we feel it's best to bask in them :) I also had some surgical work done that would be all for not having more kids!

 

That said I was 25 when mine were born and felt it was a perfect age.

 

Timing is all up to you. If you are ready once the wedding is over and in a good spot in your lives (financially secure, done school, etc) then I see no reason not to start right after your married. Not sure your moms reasonings??? Unless maybe she wants you to enjoy being a married couple and work on this new bond first?

 

School is much easier single than with kids - I did nursing school with newborn twins and it was tough!!! I'd recommend to get that all done first.

 

Good luck! And happy baby making when it's time hehe

 

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Edited by calgarybride2015

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My fiancé has an associates degree (automotive), and I have my LPN (Licensed Practical Nurse). I will go back to school at some point to get my RN or BSN, and I know that would be more challenging with children. But having children would outweigh the stressor to me. (I REALLLLLLY want kids!) Financially, we both work full time and are just saving for a house and our wedding. My mom's reasoning is that we should enjoy being a married couple because children change everything. "Yessss mom I know…" But FI and I have lived together for several years already! We already ACT like a married couple. I want some babies :)

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i slightly agree with mom :(  enjoy being married, at least for a year , just to spend time together with the new meaning of the relationship. its something youll never get back. no need to rush ;)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I agree with above, and your mom. Take some time together first. Enjoy being married, buying a house and putting all of your personal touches on it. Go out to dinner. Go to a movie. Do the things that newlyweds do. Travel even. Because yes kids do change things. I had both of my kids by the time I was 25. They're now 33 and 32. Back then having kids young was what you did but looking back on it now, I wish I had waited just a little bit longer. Even just another 2 or 3 years. Have some fun while you're young. You never get that time back!

 

Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have no advice but I would enjoy your the first few years of being a married couple. I got pregnant with my daughter when I was 24 (had her at 25) and we had already been together for 6 years while becoming new homeowners. Our daughter is almost 4 years old and we are doing everything completely backwards. I love my daughter than life itself but if I could do it differently, I would have enjoyed my youth a little more. Got married first, enjoyed my newlywed stage, travel and do other things. Good luck with whatever you decide to do. :) 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

It sounds like you already know you want to do!

 

 

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My sister got married last year and got pregnant on her honeymoon! She joked about doing so, but didn't think it would ACTUALLY happen. Well, as happy as she was to get pregnant easily, she would tell you that she should have waited a little bit. Not that it isn't manageable, but she felt like she missed out on that newlywed phase completely (and they were together for 5 years when they got married)!

Edited by beckys98

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I just had my first baby so I can tell you it is amazing BUT you Don't get US time... Ever. Lol. So I can completely understand the "wait" view. It will give you time to adjust to your new wife status. A baby is a completely different status. You Definatly sound like you want a baby so I say go for it, maybe wait a few months. Pregnancy lasts and additional 10 months so that should give you lots of time. However I highly recommend buying your house first before that baby. It will allow you to get used to house expenses before expensive babies come in to play!

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  


  • Best Destination Wedding Sponsors



    Facebook Pinterest Google+ Twitter
  • Posts

    • I have stayed at Dreams La Romana and Dreams Dominicus.  The two resorts are very different in style and decor. A few comparison points are below and fact sheets are attached for both.   Both resorts are approx 45 minutes from Punta Cana airport, close proximity to Saona Island, Catalina Island and Altos de Chavon. Top championship golf courses in the Caribbean are just minutes away including Teeth of the Dog, Dye Fore, The Links and La Estancia – all designed by world-famous Pete Dye. Restaurants are similar at both resorts.  Both offer the Explorers Club for Kids.  Dreams Dominicus  Brand new resort and in 2016 488 rooms (however additional construction was underway) More contemporary style & decor Good beach area Rooms were very nice Preferred Club located in main lobby and adjacent to main pool & beach front Food was good Center plaza area with nighttime entertainment Main lobby is small, but outdoor bar off lobby is nice Dreams La Romana Originally built in 2003 & opened as Dreams La Romana in 2008 756 rooms Recently renovated and new preferred club adults only lounge & pool added  Rooms are more traditional Caribbean decor Grounds are very lush and tropical Good beach area food was good    Dreams Dominicus fact sheet.pdf Dreams La Romana fact sheet.pdf
    • My sister has done it but with the destination wedding, only super close family members and friends came since it was expensive and farther. It was great though.
    • Thanks! I had it printed out. Very useful!!
    • Hello Guys, Are you looking for affordable wedding venue, reception halls, party rentals, outdoor event venue, birthday party venue in mobile al.  Choose Anne-Marie Cottage for your special occasion. Our cottage is an affordable venue for your intimate wedding.   Thank u 
    • Flower girl dresses tend to follow the latest trends in bridal party and thanks for sharing Great website that provide  good collection & services with affordable price .
  • Topics

×