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Advice on Bridesmaid dilemma

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#11 technoqueen

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    Posted 12 September 2010 - 07:14 AM

    Planning a wedding is probably one of the most exciting and (perhaps) stressful things you will do in your life. 


    My advice...kindly tell your friend that you are disappointed that she is no longer willing to share your special day with you, that you are sorry that she is afraid to fly, and that you wished she would change her mind.  Then move on and continue planning the most beautiful day of your life.


    Don't talk to her anymore about your wedding details, as this will only make it harder for you to accept that she is not coming if she shows no interest in what you are telling her.  Ultimately your wedding day should be all about you and your fiance and no one else. 



    #12 lucy<3woody

    • Jr. Member
    • 166 posts

      Posted 13 September 2010 - 08:51 AM

      I tend to agree with Technoqueen. Don't make this harder on yourself than you have to!  One drawback of a DW is the fact that many people who we wish could attend will not. It is a disappointment, but don't let it ruin the fun of your planning!


      If she asks you about your planning then I can understand discussing it with her, but don't offer up anymore information to her now because she isn't a positive person to discuss it with. You shouldn't have to feel bad after you talk to anyone about your wedding planning and it sounds like she is a 'debbie downer'!


      #13 delgadot

      • Jr. Member
      • 284 posts

        Posted 13 September 2010 - 08:58 AM

        I believe that the people who truley love you and your FI will be at your wedding and will make it happen no matter what. For the people who choose to not make the effort to come then you see where they stand in your life.

        #14 jaimeLe318

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        • 59 posts

          Posted 13 September 2010 - 11:36 AM

          Thank you everyone! I needed some extra support but decided to not talk about my wedding any more in her presence unless she asks and it may seem rude but I'm not even sending her a save the date because I don't feel like pressing the issue anymore. It hurts that I care so much about her day and she cares so little about mine, but I have many people coming that are excited so I am grateful. Thanks girls!!

          #15 Brandy

          • Sr. Member
          • 2,628 posts

            Posted 14 September 2010 - 05:10 AM

            I totally see where your coming from on the aspect that she doesn't even care about your wedding, even if she cant come she should still care and be honored that you asked her to be in your wedding, my friend since the 1st grade is not able to make it to our wedding due to financial reasons but I told her I understand and would love if she was still involved with everything like dress shopping and stuff like that she was so honored and touched that I still wanted to include her even though she couldn't come and she was more than happy to say of course Ill go dress shopping with you and of course Ill help you with anything you need, just because she cant come she should still make an effort in my opinion especially if shes your best friend!

            #16 MsClarke724

            • Jr. Member
            • 244 posts

              Posted 09 October 2010 - 06:29 PM

              her "craziness" just might ruin your special day anyway - a blessing in disguise

              #17 sinesbride

              • Newbie
              • 53 posts

                Posted 12 October 2010 - 03:13 PM

                Either she trully has a phobia of flying...which some do...ME included, however i still fly, but the poor soul sitting next me has claw marks and bruises on their arm from me grabbing a hold of them during flight...LOL...I sweat my azz off the whole plane ride. hehehe...However, if it's not really a phobia...then maybe she is just embarrased top admit she can't afford the trip...you did say she is getting married too. Maybe the cost of her wedding and the trip are just too much for her. it'ss no excuse though for the attitude.

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