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#31 LisaMatterni

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    Posted 07 December 2010 - 11:32 PM



    Originally Posted by LMango 

    Hi there,

     

    I'm scared to post, because I'm scared everybody is going to tell me there's nothing I can to do stop people from bringing their kids to my wedding.

     

    I'm recently engaged, and my FI's family has a lot of kids. Their own, grandchildren, adopted, and foster kids with "problems." I really can't stand kids. It doesn't matter why, it doesn't matter if I want kids of my own someday, it just matters that I'm having a VERY small, intimate wedding, and I do not want kids there. We want to have our wedding on a small island, where they do not have things like an extra house for kids to run around in. How do I ask them not to bring their kids for this one night??

     

    My dislike of kids is strong enough that if I can't arrange this as I would like, I will simply have a wedding with just our parents, my FI, and myself.


    Like other said here, you don;t have to be scared to post your concern on your wedding day. But at least you did post. 

     

    You can talk to your FI if you don't like kids to attend on your wedding day and expect his reactions. Although it can really offend people especially your FIs side, don't be scared to open you problems. After all it's your big day and your happiness matters a lot. 



    #32 LMango

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      Posted 08 December 2010 - 10:13 AM

      Thank you guys for your support! I love this website.....

       

      My FI and I just decided to subtly hint when we told his parents to expect the STD cards. He said something like, "We're sending the STD cards in December, so you guys can organize sitters for next July..." MYYYYYYYYYY sister was like, "HELL no I'm not bringing my kids! I want the night to myself!" I love one of his sisters with a baby, but I'm not sure how she'll take the news. I'm addressing the STD cards to Mr. and Mrs. **********" and my FI will call them to make sure they got the STD card, and he'll say, "yeah, we just wanted to give you guys time to get a sitter for **********" I think that's all I can do....I do have to let ONE kid come, but he's 14, and he's my FI's younger brother. I can't do much about him.

       

      I agree with the above poster, too; if if offends someone to have to leave their kid at home, then don't come!!



      #33 DmitryYakunin

      DmitryYakunin
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        Posted 08 December 2010 - 01:19 PM

        Anyway... children look great on the pictures)))))



        #34 LisaMatterni

        LisaMatterni
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          Posted 08 December 2010 - 07:48 PM



          Originally Posted by LMango 

          Thank you guys for your support! I love this website.....

           

          My FI and I just decided to subtly hint when we told his parents to expect the STD cards. He said something like, "We're sending the STD cards in December, so you guys can organize sitters for next July..." MYYYYYYYYYY sister was like, "HELL no I'm not bringing my kids! I want the night to myself!" I love one of his sisters with a baby, but I'm not sure how she'll take the news. I'm addressing the STD cards to Mr. and Mrs. **********" and my FI will call them to make sure they got the STD card, and he'll say, "yeah, we just wanted to give you guys time to get a sitter for **********" I think that's all I can do....I do have to let ONE kid come, but he's 14, and he's my FI's younger brother. I can't do much about him.

           

          I agree with the above poster, too; if if offends someone to have to leave their kid at home, then don't come!!


          Good for you! That's sound really exciting for your wedding. At least you are now calm and relaxed. Good luck on your wedding day!



          #35 cathrynprice

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            Posted 10 December 2010 - 01:34 PM

            Haha! Just tell them, I'm sure they'll understand.



            #36 smille50

            smille50
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              Posted 13 December 2010 - 07:48 PM

              I just didn't include the kids names on the invitations.  We have 35 people coming to our wedding and the youngest is 16.  It's also difficult to get a passport and travel with young children.  I think most people will understand.



              #37 schmizer

              schmizer
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                Posted 15 December 2010 - 04:00 AM

                I love kids, but not for our destination wedding.  If we were having a traditional wedding at home I would feel differently, but I really want a very intimate atmosphere and alot of our activities will be adult themed.  Your guests will understand.  Booking an 'adults" only resort may help with that, but be prepared that some feelings may get hurt.

                 

                I had a huge blowout with my mom a few weeks ago about something similar.  She and my stepdad got a dog after I moved out of the house that has become their surrogate child.  They literally take him everywhere.  I was talking to my mom about the wedding last week and she mentioned that they were planning on taking the dog and I had to put my foot down.  I mean, it's so unrealistic to take the dog to Hawaii.  What is she going to do with it when we have activities or have to go places?

                 

                To make a long story short, she got over it.  She was angry at me for awhile, but when I explained to her what my vision was  and why it was unrealistic, she calmed down.  This is your day, and you can choose to make it whatever you want.  Your guests will understand.



                #38 bmadzia1

                bmadzia1
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                  Posted 16 December 2010 - 11:37 AM

                  Just be clear with your guests. I'm in a different boat, I have a son of my own, therefore kids is a must. Coming from a person with a child, I would actually appreciate a holiday without a little one... the questions is; when all the adults go, who will stay with the kiddos.....

                   

                  Either way - it is YOUR day.. and you make how YOU want it.  You don't need to explain yourself to anyone, just say " Adults only wedding".. Simple and clear.



                  #39 june92012

                  june92012
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                    Posted 02 June 2012 - 06:04 AM

                    You only get this day once, so do what you want.  I do agree that everyone has their opinion, but it's your wedding.  You don't want to look back with regrets.  Present it as a great opportunity for them to have a vacation from their kids!



                    #40 cinnagirl

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                      Posted 02 June 2012 - 01:42 PM

                      We've have an adults only wedding. For the rest of the week, people can have their kids with them but not the wedding day. We have a babysitting service already set up for our venue. 

                       

                      I know of only 1 person in my family that will be upset about this (and about the price per kid as it's fairly high) but to be honest, every other parent that's inviting is treating it as a retreat from the kids. I say go for it if that's what you want to do! Stick to your guns!






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