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RANT! I regret booking my best friend's mother as a vendor!!

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#11 jajajaja

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    Posted 18 July 2010 - 01:21 AM

    Maybe you can help educate her then. Find some slideshows and send her to see their pics so she can figure out what the style you are looking for looks like. I hate to say it though- if you hire someone inexperienced, you will get inexperienced.

    However, I don't see how she just can't take candid pictures and how that's hard for her understand. I mean, we all do it on a regular basis! Whether they turn out good or not is another story!

    Some people are just really set in their ways of operating, which will probably result in a decline of their business. I nearly booked a photog and during a phone conversation she tried to make me change my wedding time because she was very good at "sunset" pictures. I kept telling her that wasn't really as important to me and I'd rather have my ceremony during daylight. She was really pushy about how it was her specialty and signature. I ended up saying "no thanks!"

    I know you probably felt pressured to rehire her, but it's one of those "it is what it is" situations. You gotta decide if you'd rather keep peace or try to explain again and if she doesn't get it, fire her. I hope for your benefit, she finally gets it!
    Happily married since 2008

    #12 islandbride317

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      Posted 19 July 2010 - 09:27 AM

      Much love and thanks for your advice, ladies --

      And I 100% agree that it shouldn't matter WHAT the event is...and that she should just shoot it the way the client wants, period, but I think she IS just really set in her ways, and now I am stuck with it!

      She would try to tell you that she's not inexperienced (as she's been in the wedding-photog. industry for 10 + years), but most of that time, she was working for other area photographers, and I feel like she's stumbling a bit since she decided to go out on her own a few years ago.

      And while I'd like our photos of the AHR to be something I can be proud of, I realized from the start I wouldn't be getting award-winning photos from her, and accepted that (when I pretty much was guilted into/felt obligated to work with her) -- what a mess!

      I just want her to drop the attitude with me when I am TRYING to tell her we want -- is that too much to ask?!

      @ Rachel, yes, I think I just might try to get a few sample photos together and email them to her to show her was I'm looking for -- great suggestion! What bothers me most is that during our initial consultation, she said she was "all about" finding a nice balance of posed AND candid photos, and now she's acting like "capturing-the-moment candids" are a brand new concept! Gggrrrr....

      I'll keep all of y'all posted on any other developments in this photo-saga....thanks again for all of your help! :)

      #13 BachataBride

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        Posted 19 July 2010 - 09:37 AM

        I don't really have anything else to add that hasn't been said! I hope you can work it all out.

        #14 islandbride317

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          Posted 19 July 2010 - 09:47 AM

          Originally Posted by BachataBride
          I don't really have anything else to add that hasn't been said! I hope you can work it all out.
          Thank you, Manders -- you're right; everyone's suggestions are fantastic, and I just hope I can figure out a way to get through to this woman without compromising the personal relationship I've established with her family via my friendship with her daughter. Fingers crossed we all come out of this peacefully....and hopefully with a few nice photos, too! :)

          #15 BachataBride

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            Posted 19 July 2010 - 09:53 AM

            Do you have a friend that could be your "secret back up photographer" in case her pics are not what you are looking for??

            #16 T&C

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              Posted 19 July 2010 - 02:46 PM

              Originally Posted by jerseykitten
              WOW!!!! I'd be mad too!!! She'd NEVER say that to a client that she didn't know (or would she?)!
              What a terrible situation to be in - hopefully you can have a quick conversation with her - maybe she's never photographed an AHR before
              You can say something like:

              "Hey, I think there may have been some confusion...we're not having a second wedding, this is a party celebrating our marriage, so it's a little different, which is why I don't want all of those wedding-type pictures taken. I'm really excited to have you be a part of this, and I know you're going to do a great job - these are the pictures I would like you to take."

              Kill 'em with kindness...usually makes them back down!

              Good luck!
              This is great advice!

              #17 bride2b10

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                Posted 19 July 2010 - 05:33 PM

                So I'm all for "kill 'em with kindness" when you are dealing with some annoying relative that you have to deal with but as a vendor, I don't think you should go out of your way to be nice (just my 2 cents). Despite the relationship through your friend, you are paying her for a service (not to mention you are doing her a huge favor by giving up the quality of your photos). If it were me, I'd probably make it clear (politely) that I'm hiring her for a service, and that if she can't provide that service, then you can find someone who can. It sounds mean but pictures are so important - you'll have that memory the rest of your life.... and having someone tell you what to do (with attitude on top of that) is just not appropriate imo.

                just my 2 cents :)

                21 Booked + Bride & Groom!!!

                #18 islandbride317

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                  Posted 20 July 2010 - 01:11 AM

                  @ Manders -- unfortunately, I didn't see all of this coming, so no there is no "Plan B" for me -- I'm sad there is no back-up photog. up my sleeve! Wish now, more than ever, there was....

                  And @ bride2b10 -- I 100% feel what you're saying, girl! For as nice as I can be to the vast majority of people, I certainly also carry the "bit*h card" in my back pocket, so even though I'd love to take her through her paces, I am still trying to find a way to be decent to her and still get what I want, given the circumstance. That's why this ridiculous situation is so tough! Another ggggrrr......

                  #19 dstinationdrmr

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                    Posted 20 July 2010 - 01:45 AM

                    I'm sorry to hear this. I know we all want to be nice and help out others in need but the added stress on you is unfair. I hope it all works out. I see you still have 25 days so I'm sure you can come to some type of agreement.

                    #20 BachataBride

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                      Posted 20 July 2010 - 08:14 AM

                      Christie...I just meant have a few friends take pictures!! Or do you have a friend with a nice camera...have them as your "non-paid" backup!

                      Good luck sweetie...if I was there I'd totes be your "plan B"...not that I'm a great photographer or anything!!

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