7 replies to this topic

[VA_Bride]

I see similar threads to this and have taken some of the advice from them as well, but I thought I would put my particular circumstance out there and see what folks have to say.

Our wedding is small. 10 people plus me and the fiance kind of small. I did ask my sister to be my MOH, and she is excited about it. FI will not have any groomsman standing up with him. So,

Question(s) #1: Does my sister walk down the isle before me? Stand up front or then sit down? Does my brother-in-law walk her down since there are no groomsman? And thoughts/experiences with this are much appreciated!!

Question #2: I personally would prefer walking down the isle by myself. It just seems lower key and more my style. Is this fairly normal? Have others had any issues with parents or family not liking the non-traditional walk? My dad is pretty tough and I don't *think* he will mind, but I do worry a little about hurting his feelings.

Any and all thoughts on how to make folks feel special while keeping it easy going and informal are appreciated!

Thanks ladies!

[mnh1983]

I think you should do whatever feels "right" for you. I don't see anything wrong with wanting to walk down the aisle by yourself. Just explain your reasons to your dad, and maybe say something about wanting to see his face with everyone else's when you come down the aisle. As far as your sister goes, I think either having her walk before you or just standing up there would be fine.

[hat0112]

I don’t know how your Dad is but mine would be hurt and very upset with me if he didn’t walk me down the isle. He also insists on a father/daughter dance, but I don’t think we will have enough people come to the wedding to have a private reception.

I think having her walk before you or having her stand there would be fine. Maybe ask her what she would want to do.

[MDLady]

I think since your sister is your MOH, then her hubby can be sort of the BM. Or at least walk her down the aisle. But it really depends on how you want to do things.

[Ayita]

Question 1 : I ended up with only one BM (that became my MOH...) and FI had one Best woman and one GM... (the swine flu hit us). So we ended up having BW+GM walk down, then my MOH walk by herself.

It was really OK even if she did not have anybody with her.

Question 2 : whatever feels good for you and does not hurt your dad's feeling is the right answer... there is no "must" or "must not do" there... it's YOUR wedding not anybody else's.

[VA_Bride]

Thank you all for the suggestions! I think I will probably put my MOH/sister and the front during the ceremony and so what if things are asymmetrical without a BM. Its just family and best friends there so as long as we are happy with things it will work out. Plus, we have plenty of time to entertain other ideas.

Regarding the Dad question. While I still lean towards preferring to walk by myself, my FI surprised me by answering he thought my Dad would really want to walk me down the isle when I asked him. He doesn't care either way, but I wonder if his male intuition picked up on signals from my Dad I didn't, and if so I certainly wouldn't want to leave Dad out and hurt his feelings.

Thanks for the thoughts. I will just have to see how details emerge as we continue planning, but it is so helpful to hear what other people do and bounce ideas off of folks here.

[AishaB]

I agree with the ladies, I think your way would be just fine. It really depends on what you want to do when it comes to your ceremony. I bet it will be perfect whichever way you decide

[jhartford19]

I think you should at least talk to your dad to see how he feels about the issue. My dad and I don't have the closest relationship, but I am pretty sure he would be hurt if he didn't walk me down the aisle. Personally, I would rather walk down the aisle myself, but I don't feel it is worth it to hurt his feelings. So check with him first.

As for your sister, I would have her walk down the aisle and stand up at the front like you would normally do. The groomsmen don't always walk down the aisle so this will not appear odd.

In the end, it is your day so you need to do things the right way for you!