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Small wedding - ppl assume they are invited


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#1 bride7474

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    Posted 13 April 2009 - 10:22 AM

    Hello!

    So my FI and I have decided that we want a small, intimate wedding (50 people MAX). Co-workers and people we have only known for a short time have been making comments like "I can't wait for your wedding" "I hope I can get the time off work" "when do i get my invite" etc. Infact someone just made a comment about it on my facebook status last night! How do you tell them that they are not invited without sounding rude?

    #2 jk1101

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      Posted 13 April 2009 - 10:29 AM

      We have the same thing!
      Isn't it funny - people keep telling us "We'll Come!"
      I just keep saying "It's going to be very small" and "We're only inviting very close friends and family" and "We're not having a big wedding"
      Just remember it's YOUR wedding...

      I think it's rude for THEM to ASSUME they will be invited!

      #3 Outdoor_girl1010

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        Posted 13 April 2009 - 10:33 AM

        I am kinda in the same boat as you. We are keeping ours to Family and Our best friends. We arent inviting family friends from either side. That is what we are having the party at home for after the wedding, but my soon to be MIL keeps saying well so and so is most likely going and they werent even invited. My FI told her on Sat. Mom we arent inviting them how many times do I have to tell you we are keeping it very small. So I really feel your pain. Are you guys having a party in your city when you get back? If so just tell them you are keeping it small, but there will be a party when we get back. That is what we have been telling people.
        Cory & Jennifer
        March 13, 2010Punta Cana D.R.!!http://i150.photobuc....3/IMG_6740.jpg

        #4 bride7474

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          Posted 13 April 2009 - 10:43 AM

          We had thought about having a party when we get back to down, but my fiances extended family is on the east coast, mine is on the west coast, and we live up North, so if we did, only the friends from the city we currently live in would be able to come to it and a lot of them are already invited.

          I agree, it is incredibly rude for them to assume they are coming to my wedding and they don't seem to get it. This one girl I work with, I am not close to her at all she made a comment before my FI and I even got engaged, she said "I can't wait for the day that Chris (my FI) asks me how to propose to you" I was completely weirded out because I dont think my FI has even met her, she is just someone I work with.

          I think I am just going to stick to saying "we are having a very small, intimate wedding with close family and best friends"

          #5 Outdoor_girl1010

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            Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:01 AM

            Girl, stick to your Guns. It is your day! Why have more people there then you really want. And to me there is nothing rude with saying that.
            Cory & Jennifer
            March 13, 2010Punta Cana D.R.!!http://i150.photobuc....3/IMG_6740.jpg

            #6 Dana_C

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              Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:02 AM

              I completely understand- I went through a similar situation with my co-workers and some friends of the family, but I wasn't smart enough to put my foot down so now my invite list is growing and I feel really bad because there are a lot of people invited that I really don't want to come! I'm really crossing my fingers and hoping that they won't come! I'll still have a blast, but I was hoping for something small and intimate...Stick to your guns and don't invite them!!! Good luck!

              #7 bride7474

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                Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:04 AM

                Yeah I have no problem putting my foot down there. I think that you wedding is such an intimate, emotional day and you don't want people there who are there for the party.. you want people there who really care about and want to be there for you

                #8 jk1101

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                  Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:25 AM

                  I've also told people "If we wanted a big wedding, we would get married in Jersey..." The whole point for us to do the DW was to have a small wedding with only the people we love most. We've already went up from 20 to almost 50 people being invited! We didn't realize we loved so many people!

                  #9 Michelle613

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                    Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:30 AM

                    We have the same problem. My mom said to just invite everyone to be nice...but I know when it comes down to it, half the people wont come (fingers crossed!). In this economy not everyone can take a vacation.
                    Michelle & Arsen
                    Dreams Cancun June 10, 2010http://img.weddingco...r/qmwm5sy8q.png

                    #10 bride7474

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                      Posted 13 April 2009 - 11:46 AM

                      Yeah they say to bank on 50% of people invited to the destination wedding to show up.




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