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What to do??!!


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#1 Jocy

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    Posted 18 September 2008 - 11:49 AM

    I would love some opinions on a rather sticky situation!

    I appologise if it's long winded!

    So, me and my FI have spent the past 2 months trying to pick a destination for our wedding. I'm sure all of you can relate to the hours spent pouring over Countries / Islands / Resorts....so much so, that we both just want to run away to avoid the hassle! Anyway, to make our situation a little more complex, I'm Scottish so we need to factor in half the guest list flying in from the UK while the other half will be flying in from the US.

    We recently started to like the Idea of the Dominican Republic, flights aren't ridiculous (compared to other places) and the resorts are the most reasonable we've seen. We both really like the Iberostar resorts, since there are 3 right next to each other in Punta Cana and you are able to use the facilities of all three.

    So racking my brains i remember my sister (and bridesmaid) took a holiday to the DR several years ago. I e-mail her to ask her about the color of the sea / sand (my two vitals!) and about the Island etc. Turns out she stayed in the EXACT same resort we've been looking at! AGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    I want to scream.

    So not only would i be asking her to re-visit a country she's already been to (a big no no in my family as we love to travel so re-visiting a places is almost like knocking something else off your list) but it would be to stay in the exact same resort she's been to before.

    So here's my question: Should i just scrap that whole idea and start searching again for a new resort

    What would you all do??

    #2 Michelle

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      Posted 18 September 2008 - 11:54 AM

      Heyy....well honestly I wouldnt worry that your sister has already stayed there...if its where you want to get married that I would only really worry about where you want to stay :)...if you start trying to accomodate EVERYONE that you want to go than you will get frustrated and want to scrap the whole thing probably and thats not fair to you and your FI. So i say just stick with that resort and I am sure your sister will understand.

      #3 Oscar_Ernie

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        Posted 18 September 2008 - 11:57 AM

        Hmm...this is a tough situation! Part of me wants to advise you that it's YOUR wedding, not your family's, so do what you want. HOWEVER, I totally understand how difficult it would be to ask your family members to go back to an exotic location they've already discovered on their own. When she returned your email, did she hint at all at being upset that you might choose this locale for your wedding? I know since you've been struggling to decide on a place this might be a difficult question, but have there been any other places and/or resorts that keep coming up as well? I guess what I'm asking is, do you have any second favorites? I know that's a terrible question to ask!

        I'm just not sure what I'd do! Maybe keep exploring? No, I don't know!!! Sorry I'm not helping!

        #4 JUSTUSTWO

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          Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:05 PM

          If thats the resort that you & FI picked & you both love it & would realllly like your wedding there, then I'd go with it!
          Yes, you want to accomodate friends & family, buttttt, in the end, its your wedding!!! You have to do whats going to make you happy.
          I don't want to sound inconsiderate, but its just my opinion.
          Having a DW taught me that as much as I tried to keep everyone elses needs in mind, the only thing that should've been high on my priority list was me & hubby. And I'm only saying this because you will try to please everyone, but it won't work.
          Sorry about the rant !

          Really, I'm not into going to places twice either, but, everyone who went to our wedding had such a great time at the resort, that they ALL want to go back to Jamaica next year!

          Why don't you just tell your sister that you really like the resort & were thinking of having your wedding there & ask if she'd mind going back! Maybe she won't mind!

          #5 BachataBride

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            Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:05 PM

            Well...my MOH has been to the DR a few times and it is the only place she has been. She and her husband vowed that their next Carribean vacation would be anywhere but the DR since that is the only country they had been...but when I told her I was getting married in Puerta Plata she did not even give it a second thought...she said she would be by my side wherever I went...& so should your sister! This is your day/week!! She should be happy just to be with you on such a special day...no matter where it is!!
            The only thing that should be of concern is if she said it was a horrible resort!!
            Good luck!!

            #6 NJ_bride

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              Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:15 PM

              Hi Jocy! I have been to the Iberostar Domnicana last October for vacation/location hunting with FH. It was beautiful. My parents had gone the previous year and stayed at the Iberostar Bavaro.

              The appeal here is the 3 in one resorts so your sister could stay at one of the other 2 that she had not, they are all a little different. If she liked it I'm sure she would be happy to stay there again. One thing to note though, the Bavaro is the "nicer resort" if you stay there you can use the facilites of all 3. If you stay in the other two you cannot use the Bavaro's facilites. Bavaro has room service, a swim up bar, top shelf liquor, and better food. If we went back we would have stayed there for those ammenities. I will say the service was great everywhere and the entertainment is excellent.

              We did not decide to get married there b/c we felt there was a big communication barrier with the wedding coordinator we met with, she was a little rude and didn't seam to care. I know they have a high turnover rate so maybe the new one is better. I don't know how many people you are thinking of having but we new we would have a large group and the Punta Cana airport was horrible to navigate with people grabbing your bags and such. FH and I are experienced travelers but others would have had their luggage disappear in a heartbeat!

              Overall the location was great and I would say if you have a big group check out other resorts in the DR and contact their wedding coordinators. Several friends have stayed at Excellence Punta Cana and had a wonderful experience, also the RIU.

              Hope this helps!

              #7 BachataBride

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                Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:30 PM

                The RIU Complex in PC has 5 resorts..but the RIU Palace Macao is the only one that offers the "free" wedding. I have been in contact with someone who got married at the Macao recently if you would like me to ask her to contact you (just send me your email address). I looked into this resort, but decided on the RIU Bachata (PP complex) one - because it was cheaper & I would more than likely have more guests that could attend; and two - because of the amazing gazebo location!
                Good Luck!!

                #8 jajajaja

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                  Posted 18 September 2008 - 12:52 PM

                  Hmmm...personally I wouldn't give it a second thought. Lots of my family had been to PV before, and I really didn't care. I thought "cool- I don't have to explain what to do or justify why PV." I think you should have that same outlook. It would be tough to look at all the places your guests have visited and pick a place that's new for everyone. That's way too much work and effort if you ask me.

                  If your sister loved it, then I can't see why she would have a problem with a return visit. Just cause you have been to a place before, it doesn't mean you discovered everything that it has to offer. I'm sure there were a ton of things that she may have wanted to do on her last trip that she can now do on this trip.

                  So long story short- do what you want. If you start considering small things like whether your guests have been to that particular country, then you are going to have a rough time planning when you start thinking about all the other details. :) Good luck with your decision.
                  Happily married since 2008

                  #9 Jocy

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                    Posted 18 September 2008 - 03:42 PM

                    Thank you all so much for your advice!

                    When i e-mailed my sis asking about DR i never mentioned the name of the resort we liked so she didn't know it was one we were considering when she gave me her feedback about it. On the plus side she totally loved it and had great things to say about it in comparison to other All Inclusive resorts we've both stayed at on family holidays in other locations.

                    I know she would come and probably wouldn't even say a word about returning somewhere she'd been before. I just know how i would feel. Truthfully, I'd be totally gutted. If it was any other guest other than immediate family i wouldn't concern myself, at least they could opt out of coming!! My sister is coming even if it's on the moon!

                    We've also been considering the Occidental (anyone been there?!) so no decisions have been made. I hate decisions. I think I'll procrastinate this one as long as possible!

                    NJ Bride - thanks for the tip about people staying at the Punta Cana / Dominico not being able to use the facilities of the Bravaro. Do you think you'd then need to bye them day passes to come to the wedding??

                    We're actually meeting with our travel agent this evening so i will share my new revelation with her.

                    Thanks again,

                    I'll keep you posted! :o)

                    #10 kate.com

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                      Posted 20 September 2008 - 12:03 AM

                      Maybe she would feel special because she could offer you insight. You could word it as such: Since it is such an important occassion, we love that you have seen it and enjoyed it.
                      Remember you are playing host to your guests. Having someone that has been there is a huge plus in the planning. Just make her feel special and it will be great!




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