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raisinblur

Inviting "Plus Guest"

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My only concern with "and guest" for the singles was that we were really selective about our guestlist. We didn't include a lot of people we wanted to just to keep the list small. It would be weird for us to have total strangers as an "and guest" at the wedding knowing there were a ton of other people we know and love and didn't invite just to keep the list small. Does that make sense? It's early here and my brain is muddled.

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I totally hear what you're saying. If it were me, I wouldn't write "and guest" on any of the invites, but like the other girls said, if someone asked - I would definitely say yes...esp 'cause it's traveling situation. Also, if you are having BM's and stuff, they can be good about communicating that too...that way if people don't want to pressure you with the question, they can still kind of find out how you feel about things, you know?

 

The only people I included an "and guest" for at my wedding was anyone in the bridal party and also a FSIL who was dating someone - not serisously, but I wasn't sure if she'd want to bring him etc.

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I agree with Glenda, when I was single I hated getting invited to a wedding by myself, it sucked, all these happy couples around and you're all by yourself & the fact that they're travelling and will be there for a couple of days and may not have anyone to hang out with, that would be a reason why I would probably not go, I just am a person that doesn't like situations like that, especially if the majority is couples, I hate being a 3rd wheel.

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I'm going to invite just my friend's boyfriends,.. not casual dates or random guys.. I don't think my friends will bring someone to my wedding.. and besides this wedding it's costing us a LOT.. I don't want to pay for people I don't know..

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I'm with the majority. I'm writing "and guest" on my single friend's invites. I wouldn't want to go to Mexico by myself either. Also, a lot of our single friends aren't friends with eachother, so they really wouldn't know very many people at the wedding.

 

I have one single friend who isn't going to come because she doesn't have anyone to go with, and I don't blame her..

 

just my 2 cents.

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I still feel so torn about what to do. I have single friends who are part of a group, who I know wonâ€t mind going stag, so I donâ€t want make them think they should be bringing dates by putting “and guest†on the invite. But I also have friends not in a group who might feel uncomfortable going solo.

 

I think Iâ€m going to go with not putting “and guest†on the invite but reassuring people that they can bring a guest if I think theyâ€d be uncomfortable going alone. It is a lot to ask of someone to travel to a foreign country for a wedding if they didnâ€t know anyone at the wedding but me.

 

Iâ€m just getting started in this whole wedding planning process, but there seem to be so many of these minefields I have to go through! Fun stuff…

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Kay my two cents now...I really don't think that if you write "and guest" on an invite a person will feel obligated to bring a guest, that is to a DW...at home celebrations or weddings would probably be different, but for our wedding we had I believe it was 14 singles who came down and we wrote to all of them "and guest" and even the ones in the longer relationships didn't bring their guests down! We asked them afterwards why their partners didn't come and it was because they didnt feel comfortable going to a wedding where they wouldn't know anyone! For our singles who did come, the first night in PV we went out with all of them for dinner, drinks, and then dancing and we lucked out cause they all met each other and then hung out together for the rest of the week on and off! I think we were probably totally lucky with that but people are sometimes a little more up for going with whatever when they are on vacation and we loved it!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by raisinblur View Post
I still feel so torn about what to do. I have single friends who are part of a group, who I know wonâ€t mind going stag, so I donâ€t want make them think they should be bringing dates by putting “and guest†on the invite. But I also have friends not in a group who might feel uncomfortable going solo.

I think Iâ€m going to go with not putting “and guest†on the invite but reassuring people that they can bring a guest if I think theyâ€d be uncomfortable going alone. It is a lot to ask of someone to travel to a foreign country for a wedding if they didnâ€t know anyone at the wedding but me.

Iâ€m just getting started in this whole wedding planning process, but there seem to be so many of these minefields I have to go through! Fun stuff…
For the 1 single person that literally knows no one but us I will include "and guest." But all our other single friends that know us and each other are being invited alone... if someone wants to bring a guest than that's fine but I'm not encouraging it (especailly because our guestlist is way bigger than I wanted or planned for!)

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we were selective with the "plus guest" invites - we sent them to those who had a steady SO but those like FBIL who's bedroom may as well have a revolving door we didn't

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I guess I should clarify what I'm doing. If there is a single that knows no one else I'm doing and guest - eg. my one friend from work I'm inviting. All the other singles know everyone else invited so it's not like they are alone. We all travel together all the time and usually SO's aren't invited at all - even husbands.

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