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JODEY

Babies...have them already or plan to ?

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Hi ladies,

 

This is something I havn't come across on a thread yet so forgive me if there is one.... I was just wondering your thoughts on children, We havn't got children yet but we have decide for me to come off the contraceptive pill after the wedding and if it happens it happens, we don't want to put too much preasure on us announcing that we're "trying for a baby" I have a friend that has been trying for nearly a year and I know she wishes she had never said anything because people are forever asking her if theres any good news yet.... What are your plans ? Does your H2B avoid the subject or is it him thats getting broody and not you ?

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I say once you get married people are going to ask you about kids regardless if your trying or not. Yeah you can tell them your not TTC, but they will still ask.

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We actually started trying and got pregnant before the wedding (I was about 4 weeks pregnant at my wedding). We didn't tell anyone we were trying and didn't tell anyone I was pregnant until I was 12 weeks along.

 

I swear as soon as we got engaged we had questions about when we were having a baby. And they continued even more frequently after we got married. Even though I was already pregnant, I found it all sort of annoying. What if we didn't want kids? Or what if we actually ::gasp:: wanted to enjoy our time as husband and wife before having kids?

 

I think putting so much emphasis on TTC and having this set idea of when you want to start having kids turns the whole babymaking process into a chore. People need to have fun at least the first year. Don't go in to it with charts and graphs and expectations right away.

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We tried for 3 years and finally 5 months before our wedding date we got pregnant. You never know how long it could take and sometimes it's better to just not say anything at all....but. after our heartache, that is just my opinion.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by TA Maureen View Post
I agree people will ask anyway once you're married but I also made the mistake of telling everybody that we would be trying right away so I found it extra annoying when it didn't happen right away. I thinkit's a good idea not to put too much pressure on yourselves right away. i made myself nuts with TTC. Luckily it all worked out but I think i definitely put unnecessary pressure on myself and DH.
Wow ! Only six weeks pregmant, congratulations ! Can I ask a personal question... You don't have to answer if you don't want - Were you on the pill a long time before you came off to get pregnant and how long was it before to got pregnant since you started trying ? I will have been on the pill 10 yrs when I come off after the wedding and I'm a little worried that its a long time .....

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I know several people who came off the pill and were pregnant in their first month...so I wouldn't worry about being on it for 10 years :)

 

I want kids and we plan to start trying as soon as we're married...Everyone knows I want kids...we joke that we'll have a baby 9 months after we get married. I wish everyone didn't know because I don't want that kind of pressure, but ever since I was a kid, everyone knew I wanted kids...so....oh well :) We'll see

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When we got engaged 1.5 year ago, I said, that right after the wedding, I wanted to try for a baby. But now that it's 18 days away, I don't feel that way anymore. It is a HUGE thing. I know when I get pregnant and it happens, no big deal, but I guess I'm scared of the prospect of having kids and what a major thing that is. I sometimes feel like I'm alone in that sentiment since most people want to get pregnant the moment they wed. I'm just afraid cause I have never had a child or have never cared for one. I do want children some day and I'm sure it will happen when it's meant to. I'm sure it would be a great blessing in my life. But I am scared.

 

Does anyone else feel that way?

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we did not tell anyone we were trying, because we really were supposed to just be off the pill for a year then start trying, but it happened right away for us...I think it depends on the person, I was off and on the pill for a long time and was able to get pregnant first time out, however I know a lot of people who needed to be off the pill for a while before it works. You really only have a 20% chance of getting pregnant every month.

As for people asking you, they will ask you at your reception...honestly.

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I don't think we'll be trying for kids anytime soon. I really do want to enjoy our time as husband and wife without children...plus we have a dog already, and he's SO much work that it's definitely showed me that I'm not ready for kids yet!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by cmmdee View Post
When we got engaged 1.5 year ago, I said, that right after the wedding, I wanted to try for a baby. But now that it's 18 days away, I don't feel that way anymore. It is a HUGE thing. I know when I get pregnant and it happens, no big deal, but I guess I'm scared of the prospect of having kids and what a major thing that is. I sometimes feel like I'm alone in that sentiment since most people want to get pregnant the moment they wed. I'm just afraid cause I have never had a child or have never cared for one. I do want children some day and I'm sure it will happen when it's meant to. I'm sure it would be a great blessing in my life. But I am scared.

Does anyone else feel that way?
Of course it is scary but you will do great!


I plan to come of my contraception just before the wedding. I don't want to get pregnant until after the wedding. I'm on a contraceptive implant so can not get pregnant until it is removed

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