I really need to vent, and if anyone will understand it will be you.
I don't even have to say this, we all know that when it comes to destination weddings, some people will be there and book without hesitation, some will say yes and not book, and some will not be able to attend. What I'm finding extremely difficult to process and understand is the complete lack of communication and respect my own family and "close" friends have for me and my fiancé.
We get a group rate and reserve seats, give months of advance warning and in every reminder email I have sent I have expressed that they are more than welcome to make their own accommodations, however they may not get the same price or the hotel may not have room for them when they do decide to book.
My booking deadline is next week. I have 6 people who have guaranteed me they will book by this date. One of my friends texted me to let me know she's booking on Saturday, she obviously didn't read the last email I sent where I let everyone know the agency is closed on weekends, it's no problem, she can call Monday, but then I thought, shoot - maybe I should let the others know. So I text one of my "close" girlfriends, she then asks me "do we have to pay by October? because I can't". No problem, you don't have to but there is a early booking bonus included in my rate and you will have to pay that if you miss the deadline and told her to feel free to look into other options. She then says "Your wedding is in April LOL, I don't get why we have to pay so early, I travel to resorts quite a bit and they're never sold out in April". Trying not to be rude I let her know that I am not psychic and have no way of knowing if the price will go up or down, and if the resort will sell out or not, all I did was negotiate a group rate and reserved some seats so my closest family and friends can hold their spot. My fiancé has worked in travel all his life, we did a lot of research before choosing this resort and date. The final straw of this conversation: I tell her, I get it, it is an expense and Colin and I need to have our payment in by October too. She says: Oh, you guys have to pay? I just thought you were trying to get a certain amount of people to book so you could get a free trip. It made me feel like I'm being perceived as a scammer and I should not feel like this when I'm trying to plan my wedding. Yes, sometimes we get incentives on trips if a certain number of people book, but if she was such a close friend she would have talked to me about how my wedding plans are going so far and realized I am no where near even getting one comp ticket. It doesn't matter to me, we are getting married, it's an expense, a comp would be a bonus but that's not the reason I arranged a group rate. I let her know that when we looked at this resort for 2015 a couple weeks before our dates it was sold out so she can take her chances, we ended the conversation by her patronizing me "Oh really? I've never seen that, must have been spring breakers. Woooo" And we agreed for her to look into other options. I'm at the point right now where I don't care. Do what you want.
The other shocker in my current situation is my Dad's side of the family. He has 5 siblings, they all have kids and some of them have kids. I have always been close with them, they know my dad and I have always had a great relationship especially through my parents divorce and we have always stayed in contact. My Dad will be the only one from his side at my wedding. I understand not being able to afford it, and that is completely okay, but when my cousin got married in Nova Scotia, they all went. Another just got engaged that lives there and I'm sure they will all go. Some are even going down this summer. When I was trying to collect their addresses for my invites it was so difficult, then I send the invitations and I don't even get a reply, nothing to even say they can't make it. This really upsets my Dad, so he who is scared to even use a computer posted a FACEBOOK message to his family. No one responded. So now he's calling everyone individually, and as the declines roll in, I'm not upset, I'm upset with those family members who my dad has spoken to and they still haven't contacted me, and those family members who he is chasing down, he shouldn't have to chase them down. He had planned to share a room with one of my cousins, my cousin has ignored every phone call from him, every message from me, but told other family members that he can't commit right now and will probably book later. Why couldn't he tell one of us that? My dad was left to find someone to share a room with and luckily a friend of mine from elementary school needed a room-mate. It makes my Dad really upset, which is not fair to him.
Trying not to let it bother me and focus on the fact that we have 32 of our closest family and friends from Canada and the UK with their deposits down. That is more than I could ever ask for.
Thanks for letting me rant