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Bachelorette Party Etiquette


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#1 tinabop

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    Posted 20 September 2007 - 10:30 PM

    Hey girls!

    So, my FI and I have decided to do our bachelor/bachelorette parties in Cancun the Thursday before our Saturday wedding. This will work out great for all of our guests that can come, but some of my friends were sad that they not only cannot come to the wedding, but since they can't come, they also cannot participate in the bachelorette party. So we decided to do one here too, as quite a few of my friends from NY cannot go to the wedding. My question is this: can you invite people to the bachelorette party that aren't invited to the wedding, or is this tacky and rude? If it were a normal wedding where we were inviting 200 people, I would def. think this was tacky and rude, however, since are really only inviting about 40 people to the wedding, I feel like it's different. I tried to put myself in that position, but I still can't decide what I would think. What do you ladies think?
    Kristina & Brian
    Playa del Carmen MX
    http://www.faheywollenberg.com

    #2 StephanieMN

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      Posted 21 September 2007 - 12:06 AM

      I would say it is rude to not invite them to the wedding but invite them to a party for you. What I would suggest is just having a girls night out so you can all party . It would be like having a wedding shower and inviting people you are not inviting to the wedding.

      #3 diana2008

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        Posted 21 September 2007 - 12:31 AM

        Are you having an at home reception? If so, and if they're invited to that, then I'd say it' s ok to invite them to the bachelorette party. But otherwise I wouldn't. Although my FI claims that it's different with guys and he's inviting people to his bachelor party that aren't invited to the wedding.
        Diana & Robert
        July 5, 2008
        Cabo Surf Hotel

        #4 rodent

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          Posted 21 September 2007 - 06:41 AM

          I think it depends on what the event is like. For showers I think it's rude because people feel pressure to bring gifts. I never think showers are much fun either so I wouldnt want to go to extra showers if I'm not going to the wedding.

          If the party is more like a fun night out, I think you should be able to invite whoever. For mine we are just going out dancing. I imagine there will be girls invited that I don't even know to well b/c they are my friends friends. really anyone who wants to go dance that night.

          If gifts are involved I think it's different.

          #5 Spazz

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            Posted 21 September 2007 - 07:16 AM

            Almost every bachelorette party I've been to, there have been girls there that aren't invited to the wedding. It's usually more of just a night out to party, not a formal wedding activity. I'm a bridesmaid in a wedding and we have her bach. party next weekend. I know that a lot of the girls are bringing friends, I may bring my sisters, etc. I think you can invite anyone you want!

            #6 rodent

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              Posted 21 September 2007 - 07:21 AM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Lizz
              Almost every bachelorette party I've been to, there have been girls there that aren't invited to the wedding. It's usually more of just a night out to party, not a formal wedding activity. I'm a bridesmaid in a wedding and we have her bach. party next weekend. I know that a lot of the girls are bringing friends, I may bring my sisters, etc. I think you can invite anyone you want!
              Yeah, this is what I'm used to too. I was invited to one where I didn't even know the girl. I think people would rather be included in the party even if they aren't invited to the wedding than excluded.

              #7 tinabop

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                Posted 21 September 2007 - 11:59 AM

                Thanks girls, I appreciate your opinions! It is definitely not a shower thing, and there will definitely not be any gifts. It will probably just be dinner, and then going out. Maybe I just invite a small group (aka the girls invited to the wedding) to dinner, and others out to the bar or club after. OR I'll plan something with the girls invited, and if it comes up with others (who weren't invited), and they seem interested, I'll invite them. Which one would be better?
                Kristina & Brian
                Playa del Carmen MX
                http://www.faheywollenberg.com

                #8 Wisco4

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                  Posted 21 September 2007 - 12:05 PM

                  Do you already have girls that are interested in coming but aren't invited to the wedding? If so do the first choice. If not, do the second one.
                  ~Amanda

                  #9 TATrisha

                  TATrisha

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                  Posted 21 September 2007 - 03:29 PM

                  I was actually just thinking about this today! And I think there will end up being people invited to my showers who weren't invited to the wedding. Mainly work people. I am close to them at work... but it's a "small intimate" wedding of our closest family and friends. I think that says enough. It's not that I don't want them there,... hmmm... I guess yeah it is. Dang.

                  Ah well, my answer is invite your friends!

                  ~Trisha~

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