No Kids -- Need advice!!!

[LCBride2007]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Christine Okay Ladies, as many people have said this is an issue that everyone is obviously feeling very strongly about and we have worked really hard to create a helpful, happy, and peaceful forum, so please let's end the arguement and understand that everyone has their own opinions about this...

no worries - i don't think anyone is arguing - i think a healthy debate is what this forum is all about! though i do find it funny that the original question wasn't at all about if she should have children there or not, but rather simply what she should do about the 1 person that RSVP'd saying they were bringing their kid. everyone loves a good debate - at least i do! no harm done.

[Christine]

I guess arguing was a strong word, I find a debate healthy sometimes too.

[starchild]

Viva debate! When things are typed you can't evoke tone and I think sometimes things can be read a little more harshly than they were intended to be. Or maybe they are meant to be harsh, but whatever the case we can all respectfully agree to disagree. That's why I like it here, there are other websites/forums to get down and dirty on should the need arise...lol You should hear some of the insults thrown around on a social justice forum I recently subscribed to!

[LCBride2007]

i think as long as everyone is respectful, which is typically the case here, we're all good with sharing our differing opinions!

[CaboDate]

Wow.. I had seen the previous thread about this .. and WASN'T trying to stir up debate again. I was just looking for a little advice on how to handle MY specific situation. I appreciate everyone's opinion's on the matter.. really I do.. but the fact is.. I'm doing it my way.. I was just looking for some guidance..

 

That said.. We told everyone on the Save the Date it would be a no children affair.. but we researched a good hotel with Childcare services for anyone who wanted to bring the kids on the trip.. We're having a welcome party and children are invited to that. Just not the day of the wedding. So this couple was told previously, and there was a note inside the invitation again reiterating that the WEDDING DAY would be no kids.

 

So my fiance emailed his friend.. we haven' heard back yet. I know they're completely booked because we had dinner with them a month ago and they're making it a big trip and staying for a week.

 

I'm 90% sure they are very aware it's a no kids function. For now I'm letting my fiance handle it (it's his friend, I don't know them well).. but if I don't hear something in the next week. I'm going to have make a phone call. I would feel horrible if they showed up with their son, and my close friends and family followed our wishes and didn't bring their children.

 

UGH!!

[CaboDate]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaboDate Wow.. I had seen the previous thread about this .. and WASN'T trying to stir up debate again. I was just looking for a little advice on how to handle MY specific situation. I appreciate everyone's opinion's on the matter.. really I do.. but the fact is.. I'm doing it my way.. I was just looking for some guidance.. That said.. We told everyone on the Save the Date it would be a no children affair.. but we researched a good hotel with Childcare services for anyone who wanted to bring the kids on the trip.. We're having a welcome party and children are invited to that. Just not the day of the wedding. So this couple was told previously, and there was a note inside the invitation again reiterating that the WEDDING DAY would be no kids. So my fiance emailed his friend.. we haven' heard back yet. I know they're completely booked because we had dinner with them a month ago and they're making it a big trip and staying for a week. I'm 90% sure they are very aware it's a no kids function. For now I'm letting my fiance handle it (it's his friend, I don't know them well).. but if I don't hear something in the next week. I'm going to have make a phone call. I would feel horrible if they showed up with their son, and my close friends and family followed our wishes and didn't bring their children. UGH!!

BTW.. I HOPE THAT DIDN'T COME ACROSS BITCHY.. TO EACH HIS OWN, RIGHT?

[starchild]

Right...you're good )

[Christine]

Quote:

Originally Posted by CaboDate Wow.. I had seen the previous thread about this .. and WASN'T trying to stir up debate again. I was just looking for a little advice on how to handle MY specific situation. I appreciate everyone's opinion's on the matter.. really I do.. but the fact is.. I'm doing it my way.. I was just looking for some guidance.. That said.. We told everyone on the Save the Date it would be a no children affair.. but we researched a good hotel with Childcare services for anyone who wanted to bring the kids on the trip.. We're having a welcome party and children are invited to that. Just not the day of the wedding. So this couple was told previously, and there was a note inside the invitation again reiterating that the WEDDING DAY would be no kids. So my fiance emailed his friend.. we haven' heard back yet. I know they're completely booked because we had dinner with them a month ago and they're making it a big trip and staying for a week. I'm 90% sure they are very aware it's a no kids function. For now I'm letting my fiance handle it (it's his friend, I don't know them well).. but if I don't hear something in the next week. I'm going to have make a phone call. I would feel horrible if they showed up with their son, and my close friends and family followed our wishes and didn't bring their children. UGH!!

Amy, is it possible they are just RSVPing for three for the entire vacation? I didn't even think about that.

[michelle08]

Quote:

Originally Posted by akh maybe they were just letting you know that the 3rd (the child) would be coming on the trip - maybe they don't intend on bringing them to the wedding afterall. i'd definitely talk to them, just to clear things up - hopefully it's not a huge deal!

Good point ann!

[CaboDate]

I doubt they'd be replying to the whole vacation.

Our reply card was VERY specific:

 

Wedding/Reception ___yes ____no #attending_____

Welcome Party _____yes _____no #attending_____

 

The wife put down 3 for both.

I just have this gut feeling she's ignoring our wishes. I hate to sound mean about it. But my fiance has tried to get us all together to do things in the past and she's blown us off a number of times (the husband is my fiance's old roomate). Then I invited her to my shower and she asked if she could bring her son along. Mom mom booked a restaurant room, actually to small for the number she invited.. so I had to tell her no.. simply because the restaurant wouldn't allow the extra bodies. (yes lots of kids were at this event)

The event was in the same town as her family, her husband was at home, and still she opted not to come at all since her son couldn't join her.

She's a number of years younger than me and my friends and doesn't know anybody.. so I get the feeling she feels out of place. Which is really too bad, her husband is a fantastic guy so I imagine she probably a perfectly lovely person.