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Advise Please

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#1 SaraLynn

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    Posted 12 October 2010 - 08:37 PM



    My partner and I are planning on getting married in 2011. We fell pregnant not long ago and then miscarried. I didn't realize then how much it bothered me that we weren't married before kids but we both want to have kids very badly and soon as we're in our 30s now. So he proposed after we lost the baby...anyway, we've now started the process of considering what to do about a wedding...



    We wanted to do a destination wedding because he is Australian and I am Canadian. We were hoping to find a half way meeting spot to make it easier on our friends and family. We've just started the process of looking into costs, venues, destinations etc. and are bvoth totally overwhelmed and unsure about what to do. We intially thought about going to Hawaii but looking at costs it seems far to expensive. So we started considering Mexico, but we feel extremely bad asking our families to spend $3000 + to attend our wedding. We wanted to go somewhere that is all-inclusive, so that flights, airfare etc was included making it easier on everyone...but it seems impossible to do this for less than 3000/pp. I'm tempted to just elope but we discussed this with our parents and his Mom stated that she'd be devastated if we did this. Why is this so difficult? Any advice?



    #2 Valentine_Baby

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    • 452 posts

      Posted 13 October 2010 - 04:25 AM



      First off I am very to sorry to hear about your miscarriage.  It's never an easy thing to go through.


      Having kids before or after marriage is more of a personal choice.  Some people (like myself) have been trying for years to get pregnant but have had no luck.  Having a child will happen when the time is right regardless if you are married or not.  And age is just a number!!! I know its harder to deal with when you get older and I keep trying to tell myself that age is just a number.  It's all in how young you feel :)


      A destination wedding sounds like a perfect idea for your guys!  However it seems that you aren't going to make everyone happy.  A con of having a destination wedding.  There will always be someone upset but if its what you two want than you have to follow your heart!


      There are relatively cheap places you can married in Mexico and it isn't going to cost each person $3000.  Take a look around this forum, speak with a TA.  There is tons of help here with millions of threads!


      Good luck and follow your heart and your dreams!

      #3 DiamondGirl

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      • 710 posts

        Posted 13 October 2010 - 08:39 AM

        Sorry about your loss. I agree with valentine_baby.... If you have your heart set on a destination wedding, then do it. The people that matter will make it their business to be there. When it comes down to destination weddings, you'll never be able to please anyone. Therefore, as long as you and your fiance are happy.... that's what matters. There are definitely packages available for way less than $3000 pp. Good luck!

        #4 Natalie79

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        • 112 posts

          Posted 13 October 2010 - 08:48 AM

          Hi Sara!  I'm very sorry about the miscarriage.  For your wedding, where will people be coming from?  If people are coming from all over the world and will have to travel anyway, might as well have it in Mexico!  Also, what time of year are you looking at?  If you go during a non-peak time of year it will probably be cheaper.  I know for sure March - mid June is usually pricier...as well as around the holidays.

          #5 Le Reve Hotel & Spa

          Le Reve Hotel & Spa
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            Posted 13 October 2010 - 11:43 AM


            First of all, we are very sorry about your loss.

            Welcome to the forum! I am sure you will find the answers to all the questions you may have. Have you thought of the Riviera Maya? One of the best things about Riviera Maya is the fact that you can get everything you dream, and it goes from the simplest things, up to the most elaborated... I am certain that you would love it.

            To check out various resorts, a good place to go is the hotel review section on tripadvisor.com and the venue reviews here.  TA will not offer many wedding reviews, but the list is probably more extensive and you can come back here to learn more about wedding experiences. I would suggest using both resources. 

            Your wedding is going to be full of magic and this website will help you a lot!

            We wish you the best.

            Happy planning.



            #6 SaraLynn

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            • 2 posts

              Posted 13 October 2010 - 06:26 PM

              Thank you for all your replies, I really appreciate it.


              Has anyone ever had the experience of family coming from all around the world, what would be say the best location for people coming from both Australia and Canada?



              #7 Jessie

              • Jr. Member
              • 231 posts

                Posted 10 November 2010 - 09:37 PM

                Very sorry to hear about your miscarriage!  Congratulation on the engagement.


                I had my heart set on a destination wedding, and knew that whatever I decided, the most important people would make it.  That being said, I tried to make it somewhat economical for my guests bc I didn't want it to be a big burden for them to attend if they wanted to. 


                I don't know how much it costs to travel from Australia and Canada, but as far as resorts go, the one I'm staying at (a five-star resort) costs much less than $3000 per person.  The daily rate per person that I've gotten is $160.  I don't know how long your guests intend to stay, or how much airfare will go for, but I definitely think as far as a nice resort goes, you could find something for $160-$200 per person per day.  Hopefully that helps as far as trying to estimate costs for you and your guests. 


                Also, I highly recommend contacting a travel agent.  You can tell them how much you want your guests to spend, and they can help you find a place within those parameters.  Good luck!

                #8 780chick

                • Jr. Member
                • 263 posts

                  Posted 20 November 2010 - 09:33 AM

                  I think you should talk to a TA who can find you something that is both affordable and what you want.  It's your special day and your family and friends should be supportive whatever you choose.

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