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Not invited to Mexico, invite to shower?

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Originally Posted by TonyandTricia View Post
To me, a shower is for your closest friends and family and if you didn't think they were close enough to invite to the wedding I wouldn't invite them to the shower. I would probably think it was kind of rude to be invited to give someone a gift and not invited to share in their day with them. "You want a gift from me, but not for me to share in your wedding with you?!?" If you were only inviting a few people to the wedding then maybe I could understand, but 70 people is a lot.

You will most likely still get gifts from them for the AHR if that's the point of inviting them to your shower.

Just my thoughts...
I agree with TonyandTricia as well. I've always heard that you don't invite people to the shower who aren't invited to the wedding (with the exception of work showers).

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I would definately not invite people to the shower who aren't invited to the actual wedding. If they had just chosen not to attend the wedding then that would be different. If they weren't close enough for the wedding then they aren't close enough for the shower!! You don't want to insult them!

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My fiance and I wanted/ could only afford a small wedding. We had an engagement party and invited everyone even if they weren't invited to the wedding. I know this is "bad etiquette" however I wanted to celebrate with everyone even though I couldn't afford to have them at our wedding.

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I agree with not inviting people to the shower that are not invited to the wedding. But I have a different issue. So many of our guests are from all over the country. Do I just invite those people who I think might be able to attend? (ie locally or close by) or invite everyone and wait and see if they attend? My FI mother is throwing me a shower in October and wants a list of those people I would like to invite. And I don't know what I should be doing? Any help?

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I'm kind of torn on this topic. I was invited to 2 showers, attending 1 for a friend & then wasn't invited to the wedding & I thought it was pretty rude. She had her wedding in another state & the shower that I did attend was a stock the bar party, in which they used that alcohol for the wedding...that I wasn't invited to!!! On the other hand, I have a group of about 10-15 long time girlfriends that I have been to EVERY bridal & baby shower for the last 10 years & my best friend wants to throw a shower for these girls. I really don't see a problem with it.

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