Unique issue with guests staying at the resort. HELP!

[DWbridetobe]

I have a problem, and I've searched the forums pretty extensively to make sure this wasn't posted before. If it has been, I apologize for the duplicate.

 

My FI and I are having our wedding at a Sandals resort in St. Lucia in November. There's 3 resorts within a 10m ride from each other. Sandals provides the transportation. Sandals offers a "Stay at 1, Play at 3" promotion, in which they can all use all 3 resorts for dining, relaxation and entertainment. Also, there is no day pass required to attend the wedding.

 

Many guests on my FMIL's "list" plan on staying the entire 2 weeks, which FI and I are fine with. Our only request was that they stay at one of the other 2 Sandals resorts. This was so that we would have some sense of a 'honeymoon'.

 

My FMIL keeps telling me how tacky this is and how hurt our guests will be, however I can't find any etiquette advice about it. Whether it's proper or not really isn't the concern, but how our guests feel. I don't want to offend anyone, but at the same time, it's OUR wedding. Does anyone have any input on what the best course of action would be?

 

Oh, and did I mention... 75% of the guests that are planning to come are people that she, personally, invited? Our original reason for planning a DW was to keep the wedding small and intimate.

 

I'm a bit of a train wreck dealing with the FMIL, and the wedding is still 9+ months away! AURGH!

[whitechocolate]

Ew, what a sticky situation... I don't know of any specific etiquette that applies here, but I can see being a little offended if someone told me I could/should only go to two of the resorts. I totally see where you're coming from, wanting a true honeymoon...hopefully the guests will have enough sense not to follow you around..?? Good luck!!

[DWbridetobe]

Unfortunately we have guests interested staying at all 3 resorts, due to the amenities that are available at each. If we don't "restrict" one resort, we can't completely escape our guests, even for a few days.

[Island Bride]

im kind of in the same boat in a way.. theres only one resort where im getting married and most of the guests are planning on staying an extra week so there goes our little honeymoon were just having this mini one for now cuz we wanna go somewhere where theres lots of snow for our actual honeymoon which is not possible the month of May when were getting married! my suggestion to you is to just stick it out, then a couple months down the road plan a little get-away for just the two of you! hope all works out for you! good luck!

[daniepps]

I think you should marry at one resort and then relocate to another (the one that has the least amount of your guests staying there) You can make it clear to everyone that you're going on your "honeymoon" and would appreciate it if everyone respected that.

[carolina24]

definately put your foot down on this one. its your HM you dont want to spend it with family. if you havent booked yet, see where everyone else books then book a different resort. it might be sneaky but you need that time to connect with your new hubby. good luck!

[Sapphire723]

Do you have any objections to going to a different resort altogether, like Secrets, for your honeymoon? We're going on a cruise for our HM, so that we don't have to worry about sharing it with guests.

 

No matter which resort people stay at, if they want to find you and bug you, they will. If your FMIL doesn't understand why she's not invited to your honeymoon, then it's time for your FI to set some boundaries.

[JenniferSS]

You may want to try to stay for the honeymoon portion at one of the private suites such as a rondaval at sandals Grande st. Lucian -you'll have everything that you need -pool, hot tub, room service and lots orf privacy right at your finger tips! Or even one of the suites on the bluff at Sandals Regency La Toc - they are fairly private and set apart from the main area!

 

Plus with moving to a seperate resort or a different room category it signals to your guests that you are now "honeymooning"!

[DWbridetobe]

Thank you everyone for such great feedback. It's nice to see some validation of my feelings, just so I know that I'm not the one being a PITA here!

 

My FI and I are definitely going to sit down and take all of this into account, and come up with the best solution!

[daniepps]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sapphire723 Do you have any objections to going to a different resort altogether, like Secrets, for your honeymoon? We're going on a cruise for our HM, so that we don't have to worry about sharing it with guests. No matter which resort people stay at, if they want to find you and bug you, they will. If your FMIL doesn't understand why she's not invited to your honeymoon, then it's time for your FI to set some boundaries.

I completely agree!