The Never Ending Guestlist

[Sheree10]

Follow Up: Thank you all for sharing your stories. FI and I had a meeting with FMIL this weekend. We knew that we didn't want to add any more people but I also wanted a compromise. FI stood his ground. We played Good cop/Bad cop. We went over the list to make sure those she wanted to invite were there. I allowed her to add five more people.

 

FMIL is planning to have an AHR for her family and friends so she can invite whoever she wishes to it. Now that we're done dealing with this, it will be something else soon. lol.

[JOSIE]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sheree10 Follow Up: Thank you all for sharing your stories. FI and I had a meeting with FMIL this weekend. We knew that we didn't want to add any more people but I also wanted a compromise. FI stood his ground. We played Good cop/Bad cop. We went over the list to make sure those she wanted to invite were there. I allowed her to add five more people. FMIL is planning to have an AHR for her family and friends so she can invite whoever she wishes to it. Now that we're done dealing with this, it will be something else soon. lol.

trust me, there is ALWAYS something else! I'm glad it's over for now! Good compromise!

[YoursTruly]

Like the girls have said, bank on a third of those guests coming. We made it very clear from the beginning that budgte dictated our actions. If our parents wanted us to invite them, it was contingent on them covering the difference. Simple.

[Jo 2010]

I am so glad that other girls are having this struggle!

 

The whole reason we decided to have adesination wedding was that we had an engagement party with 150 people and it was crazy! I didn't see my FI except when we cut the cake coz we had to split up to cover all the guests! All my family and friends travelled at least i.5 hours to be there and I felt like I saw each one of them for about 2 minutes each! I spent the whole day feeling guilty that I only spent a couple minutes with so-and-so, when my closest friends had flown in from all over Australia to be there and all I wanted to do was spend some time with them!

 

We wanted a wedding that was small, with only our nearest and dearest, so instead of offending a whole lot of family, we decided to have a DW - and now eve thats getting out of control!!

 

I don't know how its even possible but there are more poeople on the guest list to the wedding then there were to the engagement party!

 

and then there's FMIL's firneds from work etc etc. I know this is a holiday as well as a wedding and people want to bring their friends too - but this is crazy.

 

I like the good cop bad cop idea! might have to start pulling that out

[Sheree10]

Quote:

Originally Posted by YoursTruly Like the girls have said, bank on a third of those guests coming. We made it very clear from the beginning that budgte dictated our actions. If our parents wanted us to invite them, it was contingent on them covering the difference. Simple.

Hey I notice that you're from Central Jersey. I may be making the move there after the wedding. Not sure if I'm ready to be a Jersey girl!

At this point I hope we don't get too much more than we budgeted. I want to really enjoy everyone's company. I agree that the budget will dictate our actions also. The more people we have, the less things we'll be able to include- which will suck since that's the reason we're having a DW.

[Sheree10]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jo&Daz 20-10-2010 I am so glad that other girls are having this struggle! The whole reason we decided to have adesination wedding was that we had an engagement party with 150 people and it was crazy! I didn't see my FI except when we cut the cake coz we had to split up to cover all the guests! All my family and friends travelled at least i.5 hours to be there and I felt like I saw each one of them for about 2 minutes each! I spent the whole day feeling guilty that I only spent a couple minutes with so-and-so, when my closest friends had flown in from all over Australia to be there and all I wanted to do was spend some time with them! We wanted a wedding that was small, with only our nearest and dearest, so instead of offending a whole lot of family, we decided to have a DW - and now eve thats getting out of control!! I don't know how its even possible but there are more poeople on the guest list to the wedding then there were to the engagement party! and then there's FMIL's firneds from work etc etc. I know this is a holiday as well as a wedding and people want to bring their friends too - but this is crazy. I like the good cop bad cop idea! might have to start pulling that out

Oh wow! 150 people at the engagement party!!! I can see how your guestlist is getting out of control. You and your FI just need to decide what you want and if you can afford to invite all of those people. Just inviting them is expensive because you have to get invites ( didn;t realize how expensive they were!), assemble them and send them out( postage costs too!). So it all adds up. You want to be able to spend time with FI on your wedding day and not have to keep greeting guests. The good thing about a DW is that you can spend a few days with your guests.